aNewEternity

hi, I'll go by aNewEternity. I have been fighting hard against alcohol dependence and abuse since late January / early February. I put together a month of time during March/April, and also had periods of 12 and 9 days at different points. right now I am at 5 or so days, and only one drinking episode in the past two weeks. I feel pretty good, confident but hopefully not cocky.

I tried to get involved in AA but never believed in it. the more time I have spent researching, the more I feel alienated, intellectually and otherwise, from the 12-step model. I have moved towards embracing SMART and Rational Recovery. luckily there are 3 SMART meetings/week in my immediate area; I went to my first on Monday.

my substance abuse counselor upstate (I just graduated, back on Long Island now) recommended that I become 'immersed' in recovery, so I'm joining message boards like these and doing a lot of reading. trying to make recovery a 'hobby' of mine - luckily, I find it interesting as well as necessary.

OklaBH

Welcome! You will like it here! Great people!

scrambled2012

Good morning New~~~~welcome to SR~~~~!

congrads on your five days~~~~

Sapling

Welcome aNewEternity...This a good site...AA made you alienated intellectually?...Knd of makes me wonder why it worked for me. I had to look at recovery a little more serious than as a hobby.....My life depended on it. I hope SMART and AVRT work for you. How was the SMART meeting?...Did you like it?

BillyPilgrim

Welcome aNewEternity. You will find support here for whatever path you choose.

The destination is what matters to us

aNewEternity

I did like it. there was one woman who sort of monopolized the time, but that has happened to me at AA too. I also received a helpful packet from the 'facilitator'.

my main intellectual issue with AA is that I always found it hard to believe that a group of people in Ohio 80 years ago could by chance (without a method based on empirical analysis) author a program that had any sort of real efficacy beyond placebo (and all statistics I have come to view confirm this). it is/was helpful for me in a "bumper-sticker psychology" sort of way, but most people there seem to view the Steps and Traditions as Holy Writ, which I cannot get into.

also the idea of powerlessness and dependence on a higher power are hard for me to swallow. a good short video on the SMART response to powerlessness concept is on YouTube under title "SMART Recovery and powerlessness" (I can't yet post a link, sorry). instead SMART and RR are empowering, that I do have the ability to refuse a drink, and that there are ways for me to get better at doing this. I much prefer the way I am talked to in SMART than I am at AA.

all that said, I don't want to rain on anyone's parade. if you like AA and go there voluntarily, fine, but it is not for me at all.

tomsteve

hope it works for ya.
any empirical analysis on SMART of RR?

Sapling

I totally respect that it's not for you....I have no problem thanking God everyday I found AA...It saved my life....For that I'll keep coming back. I'm glad you found something you like...That's all that counts.

OklaBH

Its what works for you. What works today may not work tomorrow so keep your options open. Ive notice over the last year that people new to recovery comeo ut of the shoot saying "AA isnt for me" It took me awhile to grasp it. I stopped working it & stop participating in SR (and I can admit that now-it was my fault)

Its all the end result. Stay sober and enjoy a productive life.

aNewEternity

SMART officially says that "the efficacy of any group is unknown" -- non-step-12 approaches have been less than scrupulously studied and researched. however the difference for me is the nature of the model - SMART is willing to evolve with time, as new research becomes available, while the AA problem has remained and always will remain the same no matter the direction of the wind.

ACT10Npack

aNewEternity good to see your seeking help. I'm in the same boat with you. Not big in the higher power and also have trouble sticking with any program. I would go to it and then stop. It's one of those things I just want it to fix itself. But truly you will need to work on your recovery everyone until it gets easier. Still trying to do that myself. SMART is a lot more work then AA or SOS. So many things you will need to do to help yourself.

Do you know your triggers before you decided to have a drink? Are you trying the ways you live your life as in no bars, parties with alcohol or just having a glass of wine when making dinner?

Good diet, exercise and daily routine will have with staying sober. Some people just use SR for stay sober. You will need to find it out but from other people the longer your sober the easier it will be. Good luck and keep coming back.

2granddaughters

Nice to meet you. Good luck in your recovery.

AA will be there for you if you need it. I did.

All the best.

Bob R

aNewEternity

yes, it is, and thank you. the negativity I may display at times towards AA is towards the program and the 12-step model, not towards AAers themselves. I have met several very cool people through AA, it restored my faith in the possibility of relationships without alcohol. I also believe that the organizational structure is brilliant or even visionary. Charles Bufe writes a bit about how it is designed in accordance with anarchist principles of self-reliance/governance.

aNewEternity

I feel a need to clarify my "hobby" comment.

obviously I do take recovery seriously. I may or may not buy into the jails-institutions-death AA melodrama, but I do realize that sobriety is a total lifestyle makeover, requires developing new, adaptive coping mechanisms, building new relationships, the whole works.

I called recovery a "hobby" because I have taken to an intellectual interest in the topic which transcends my own desire to 'get better'. drug control policy has long been an interest of mine - I wrote at least two papers on the topic in college - and addiction, recovery, and recovery programs and societies interest me. I spend more and more of my time lately reading recovery literature that is not necessarily of direct relevance to me and hanging out on message boards like this one.

sugarbear1

Welcome to SR!

Glad you are here!!

Zencat

Welcome to SR.

I am bursting with joy that you are here. Its good to see that you find SMART and RR is a good fit for you. I am far out numbered here at SR as far as the type of recovery programs the members use.

I do attend AA open meetings for support and sharing my ES&H with others. I do this as a secular type of dude. As my recover choice was narrowed down after a very painful trial and error method of finding what will help me...nearly killed me in fact. I ended up using secular recovery principles once I recovered from my hellish ordeal of 'what I hear works from others' to be recovered tribulations.

Stick around SR, there is an active thread going on about the AVRT http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post3432714 if you would to see. Or please post around SR anywhere you find a need to. Truly hope to see you more around.

Dee74

welcome aboard aNE - good to have you here

D

DisplacedGRITS

Welcome to SR! I'm glad you found a program that's working for you. I'm agnostic but very spiritual and when i reached my spiritual rock bottom i went to AA and that's been working for me. I know most of the people there have a Christian Higher Power but people seem to make a point that they respect whatever another person's HP is so long as it keeps them sober.

I think what's really worked for me with AA is the actual Fellowship of AA. Going to meetings and being around people with varying degrees of sobriety is wonderful. There is so much wisdom at those meetings, it blows my mind every time.

Throwing yourself into recovery is a great idea. I had to turn my live upside down. Considering how effed up my life was, it needed to be turned upside down to be rightside up! I changed a lot of my habits, put myself on a strict schedule and most importantly, i started practicing rigorous honesty. That was the hardest considering that i was a skilled liar. I don't know if you're a liar/hider but if you are start practicing honesty. It will set you free.