Hardtofind

I'm having a hard time today. Nothing much to do tomorrow, I'm on summer break. Tonight the hubby is going to a work dinner and will be home kind of late. My brain is churning. I still have anxiety attacks and shaking. I have GAD anyways, so I need to learn a better way to handle the anxiety when it strikes than drink. Gonna work in my garden a bit and check back later for responses. Thanks to all who have been inspirational and supportive so far.

My plan is if I feel I want to drink, I'll go to a meeting. If I still want to drink after that, I can. Usually, that is the last thing I want after looking at people in the eye, sharing, and hearing their stories of whoa. I plan to go to a 6:00 and hope I can hold out till then

Michael66

Hi Hardtofind

I found the first couple of weeks pretty miserable. One thing that helped me was to keep a journal. This helped in two ways. Firstly I got all my emotions out onto paper, and that itself was cathartic (and also took time I would otherwise probably be drinking). Secondly it was really good to see after a couple of weeks my mood noticeably lift - I could see that even though I still felt a bit down I was so much better than in the first week or two. Looking back I can see a dramatic shift in mood between weeks 2 and 4. For me this was also a prayer diary so what I was writing was what I wanted to say to God. I don't know if you share in a faith, but that link was very important for me.

I'm sure lots of people will have other advice as well.

God bless you - it is a bit miserable to begin with but it will get easier and better. It's still early days for me (6-7 weeks) but I feel so totally different to this time a couple of months ago.

FredG

If you feel shaky on staying away from drinking and don't think you can wait for the meeting phone your sponsor. If you don't have one, get one or at least phone someone in the program that you can talk to. . Phone the local A.A. hotline if nothing else - It's in the phone book and/or local paper.

It's the way the program works. It helps me to recover if I can pass on what I know to others who need help so there are people in the program just sitting out there waiting for you to call asking for help.

ABOVE all stick with it - even though you can't see us, we're right there with you

walktheline1

Don't set yourself up to drink after a meeting if you don't feel better. You're giving yourself excuses to fail. Make a list other things you can do. Paint a room, clean your pantry, go running, take the dog on a long walk, etc. Anyways, congrats on 4! I'm at basically a month and feel a lot better than those first few weeks of hell! Stick with it! :-)

MycoolFitz

It's tough at first (and for me later on too) I too am blessed with GAD, I even get axious over maybe getting anxious. I find moving my body and my mind, such as working in my little garden, going to a meeing, taking a walk, reading and posting helps me. I'm also starting volunteer work helping others. The one thing I know for me drinking masks the anxiety momentarily but it always comes back with a vengence. My DR. prescribed some meds for anxiety attacks, which I rarely take but it helps to know I have them if worse comes to worse. I think your posting on SR is a great alternative to picking up. Have you talked with your DR.? All care to you.

SoberD

I found (in numerous attempts to quit) that the first 4 days or so are the worst. This time around, I am using "the list" as a way to remind myself why i am on this mission. A few months ago, I had 50 days sobriety and thought I was "cruising," had 2 beers for dinner, and then without intending it, was drunk for a month straight. Hang in there and stay focused on the big picture - IMHO there is nothing more demoralizing than having to start over again and again...

rc4dt1

check out intherooms.com - it's an online meeting site where you can create a profile and link up with other people trying to get and stay sober on the internet. it's a nice tool to use in addition to this forum, calling people, meetings, reading, etc.

good luck!!

Hardtofind

Ya, I'm going to a womens group tonight. The meetings I've been to are good, but most of the women there aren't much further along than me emotionally. I'm lucky to be catching this semi early compared to some. I'll try the central office if I need too. Getting my mind busy helped for this hour. Thanks for the reply!

Hardtofind

So if the first four days are the worst, I'm almost to the other side to start feeling better. Would be stupid to repeat them! Thanks.

Hardtofind

I love the suggestions from everyone. I am a christian, so faith is not a problem for me. It's just putting that faith into practice instead of relying on myself that is the problem at the moment. Nothings wrong with God, just me.

FredG

LOL - you have a failing that most of us have. I keep turning it over to God and then looking over His shoulder to make sure He's doing it right. Not sure I will ever get over playing tug of war with God, although every now and then he slaps me upside the head with a two by four to catch my attention about something important and I let go and let God

Dee74

I'm glad you came here for support HTF - enjoy your meeting

D

Sapling

Then use that. My first couple weeks I did a lot to increase my faith...I was just trying to make it hour by hour. Anytime I had the urge to drink I found The Serenity Prayer was great for taking it away...I said it a lot. Do whatever you have to do to not drink one day at a time. I prayed a lot and went to a lot of meetings....Got a sponsor and worked the steps...I wanted it with my life. I have 11 months sober now...And my faith increases every day I don't drink. And I thank God for that. You can do this...Have faith.

DisplacedGRITS

Keeping busy and going to meetings worked for me. I also read a lot. Jumping into another world when the one i'm in is driving me nuts really helps from time to time! I used to get stuck in a 4 day cycle. Get over the worst of withdrawls by Day 4 then hit the drink again. Just keep your focus on the next minute then the next. Don't think too far ahead. For me thinking about making it to Day 7 was too much. Heck, even thinking about making it to the end of the day was sometimes more than i could handle so i just broke it down to increments i could swallow. The end of the half hour, the end of the hour, when the liquor department closed, when the beer cave at the gas station closed, phew, day over! However you have to do it. Eat the elephant one bite at a time.