i wanna quit
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 1
i wanna quit
thanks for advance for opening this up & taking time to read my post. basically, i'm a 24 year old girl and i'm starting to realize that i may be an alcoholic. However, I'll give you some background info first.
I drank on and off since i was 15 until the age of 20, but nothing too excessive. At the age of 21, I met a guy who was Christian and he never drank because he had very strong views on drinking and he was completely against it. He had a very positive influence on my life because his views seemed very healthy to me, so I stopped drinking for one year and a half while I lived with him. I might have had some wine just a couple of times, but I did not get drunk....it was in healthy moderation.
However, he broke up with me in Oct.'11 and I moved back to my home state. At this point, I got myself a pretty good job and became pretty independent. But I took the break up very badly...so badly that I turned to alcohol again. I used to be a fun loving girl who had a lot of friends...but after my break up, I just wanted to drink by myself in my room. And so I did. I think the longest I've gone without drinking since my break up is one week and that was after New years Eve. Now my alcohol is starting to affect my job.
Basically I started dating someone new and we were together for 8 months...I found out he lied to me on Friday night and I just chugged a bottle of Vodka...I literally threw up in my sleep and called in sick to work the next day. I did the same thing last Thursday. Once I start to drink, I don't wanna stop. Here is where i decided enough is enough. I've drank in the morning in the past year and a half, so much that I got completely wasted and wasted my whole day away. I've also drank before work, and of course after work too. I really wanna stop drinking, because even after two days of not drinking I feel more alive and energized...the problems even start going away.
But why do I feel so triggered by certain things? I wish I didn't feel the need to drink every time I see an alcohol commercial or I hear a co-worker talking about it. I honestly don't have close friends I can talk to so I decided to post on here. I have a great family who noticed that I have this problem, but they're being more harsh than understanding and supportive. Please give me some feedback on what helps you guys fight the triggers and cravings. I really wanna move on from these break ups, alcoholism, and focus on positive things in life. Any feedback is greatly appreciated!
Sorry this is so long!
I drank on and off since i was 15 until the age of 20, but nothing too excessive. At the age of 21, I met a guy who was Christian and he never drank because he had very strong views on drinking and he was completely against it. He had a very positive influence on my life because his views seemed very healthy to me, so I stopped drinking for one year and a half while I lived with him. I might have had some wine just a couple of times, but I did not get drunk....it was in healthy moderation.
However, he broke up with me in Oct.'11 and I moved back to my home state. At this point, I got myself a pretty good job and became pretty independent. But I took the break up very badly...so badly that I turned to alcohol again. I used to be a fun loving girl who had a lot of friends...but after my break up, I just wanted to drink by myself in my room. And so I did. I think the longest I've gone without drinking since my break up is one week and that was after New years Eve. Now my alcohol is starting to affect my job.
Basically I started dating someone new and we were together for 8 months...I found out he lied to me on Friday night and I just chugged a bottle of Vodka...I literally threw up in my sleep and called in sick to work the next day. I did the same thing last Thursday. Once I start to drink, I don't wanna stop. Here is where i decided enough is enough. I've drank in the morning in the past year and a half, so much that I got completely wasted and wasted my whole day away. I've also drank before work, and of course after work too. I really wanna stop drinking, because even after two days of not drinking I feel more alive and energized...the problems even start going away.
But why do I feel so triggered by certain things? I wish I didn't feel the need to drink every time I see an alcohol commercial or I hear a co-worker talking about it. I honestly don't have close friends I can talk to so I decided to post on here. I have a great family who noticed that I have this problem, but they're being more harsh than understanding and supportive. Please give me some feedback on what helps you guys fight the triggers and cravings. I really wanna move on from these break ups, alcoholism, and focus on positive things in life. Any feedback is greatly appreciated!
Sorry this is so long!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,138
Hi Freefallin and welcome to SR! You'll find a lot of great support here, so keep posting.
There's many different methods to help you quit drinking. I found the Rational Recovery method to be really helpful in dealing with triggers and understanding why I felt compelled to drink at times. You can read about Rational Recovery in our secular forum.
I'm sure others will be along soon with other suggestions.
It's very dangerous to drink to the point where you throw up in your sleep -- a lot of people have died that way. Good job on reaching out for help. You can get sober and put all of this behind you -- and it does get easier with time!
There's many different methods to help you quit drinking. I found the Rational Recovery method to be really helpful in dealing with triggers and understanding why I felt compelled to drink at times. You can read about Rational Recovery in our secular forum.
I'm sure others will be along soon with other suggestions.
It's very dangerous to drink to the point where you throw up in your sleep -- a lot of people have died that way. Good job on reaching out for help. You can get sober and put all of this behind you -- and it does get easier with time!
Last edited by Dee74; 06-05-2012 at 03:51 PM. Reason: removed commercial link
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Tempe, AZ
Posts: 15
FreeFallin,
I just recently made the decision to quit after about 15 years of drinking. I'm 30 now and realized that it causes more harm than good. I was drinking a 12 pack or more every day up until last week. I quit cold turkey but I think it was the best decision I could have made.
It sounds like you are on the right track if you are looking for an avenue of support. It feels good to be encouraged by others and it is also empowering to know that it is YOUR decision and not something that is being forced on you. So keep it up. I know relationships and certain types of people in relationships can "drive you to drink" but that's just an excuse and you can be stronger than that impulse...
I just recently made the decision to quit after about 15 years of drinking. I'm 30 now and realized that it causes more harm than good. I was drinking a 12 pack or more every day up until last week. I quit cold turkey but I think it was the best decision I could have made.
It sounds like you are on the right track if you are looking for an avenue of support. It feels good to be encouraged by others and it is also empowering to know that it is YOUR decision and not something that is being forced on you. So keep it up. I know relationships and certain types of people in relationships can "drive you to drink" but that's just an excuse and you can be stronger than that impulse...
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Here, Now
Posts: 4,268
Thanks for posting on SR, that's a great start. Realizing you have a problem and you use alcohol to self-medicate is valuable knowledge. I'm sure you will get much good advice and support here as you read and post. I just want to say welcome.
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 557
You've got lots of friends ... you just haven't met them yet.
My suggestion is to try out a few A.A. meetings. Not saying that you are an alcoholic, just saying that there are a lot of people there that know what you're going through and they can help without judging.
Personally I chased the chicken and egg theory for a while. My problems and issues caused me to drink and my drinking caused my problems and issues. Someone told me that the solution to this particular theory turns out to be extremly simple. Remove the drinking and then I can work on my problems and issues. Worked.
Problems and issues are a part of life. I can only grow by dealing with them. Alcohol just allows me to hide from them. When I sober up they're still there and maybe they've even grown because I've allowed them to fester.
You'll find lots of support here on SR but in my opinion there's nothing like a friend that understands me. I found lots of them in A.A. and the nice part is that it doesn't matter where I go, they will be there to help me get through the tough parts in life
You're way to young to throw your life away hiding behind a bottle. You're 1 year younger than I was when I quit. It's a great life out here, why don't you join us, love to have ya.
My suggestion is to try out a few A.A. meetings. Not saying that you are an alcoholic, just saying that there are a lot of people there that know what you're going through and they can help without judging.
Personally I chased the chicken and egg theory for a while. My problems and issues caused me to drink and my drinking caused my problems and issues. Someone told me that the solution to this particular theory turns out to be extremly simple. Remove the drinking and then I can work on my problems and issues. Worked.
Problems and issues are a part of life. I can only grow by dealing with them. Alcohol just allows me to hide from them. When I sober up they're still there and maybe they've even grown because I've allowed them to fester.
You'll find lots of support here on SR but in my opinion there's nothing like a friend that understands me. I found lots of them in A.A. and the nice part is that it doesn't matter where I go, they will be there to help me get through the tough parts in life
You're way to young to throw your life away hiding behind a bottle. You're 1 year younger than I was when I quit. It's a great life out here, why don't you join us, love to have ya.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Indianapolis, IN
Posts: 889
For me, the reason I drank was because I liked the affects that alcohol gave me. Good day, bad day, getting fired, or getting a promotions.. all were reasons to drink. Personally I see a lot of looking outside of yourself at the problem. Kind of, if this didn't happen or that didn't happen I wouldn't have drank so much. I'm not being hard on you, I'm just trying to point out the denial that our disease (or addictive voice) uses.
The jist is I have had many nights like you describe. I've said, "NEVER AGAIN - AND THIS TIME I MEAN IT" literally hundreds of times.
Here is what I want you to really pay attention to.
I can not stay sober based on self knowledge.
If I could have, then I would have quit when I was 18. My understanding is, for a real alcoholic (like me), I have a metal obsession with alcohol. AND a physical craving once I drink. What that means is I can't stop thinking about drinking (maybe for a day or two, but that's it) and when I drink, my body can't stop wanting it. Once I learned this, it helped me a ton.
My life has been completely dictated by alcohol. I'm either drinking, planning on drinking, or planning on not drinking. Before recovery it was always something I was kicking around in my head.
For me, I had to find a way that I could deal with lost relationships, crying kids, nagging boss, broken down car, etc... and not drink.
I found it in the rooms of AA.
Best of luck to you! You're not alone...
The jist is I have had many nights like you describe. I've said, "NEVER AGAIN - AND THIS TIME I MEAN IT" literally hundreds of times.
Here is what I want you to really pay attention to.
I can not stay sober based on self knowledge.
If I could have, then I would have quit when I was 18. My understanding is, for a real alcoholic (like me), I have a metal obsession with alcohol. AND a physical craving once I drink. What that means is I can't stop thinking about drinking (maybe for a day or two, but that's it) and when I drink, my body can't stop wanting it. Once I learned this, it helped me a ton.
My life has been completely dictated by alcohol. I'm either drinking, planning on drinking, or planning on not drinking. Before recovery it was always something I was kicking around in my head.
For me, I had to find a way that I could deal with lost relationships, crying kids, nagging boss, broken down car, etc... and not drink.
I found it in the rooms of AA.
Best of luck to you! You're not alone...
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: mo
Posts: 183
I, like many others, made the promise to cut back many,many times. And I wouldn't do it because I could always find an excuse or impulse to drink more. To me, the issue of "alcoholic- am I or aren't I?" is irrelevant. Drinking was harming my life, damaging my relationships, keeping me from dealing with life's obstacles or enjoying its triumphs, and keeping me from living MY life as I hoped to live. Only get one shot at this. Once I made a decision that I would not drink ever again (big plan in AVRT words but I use all inspirations in recovery) it made it easier to focus my mind on what did make me happy and fulfilled around me. When I hang out with friends, I don't focus on a lost opportunity to drink or sorry for myself that I cant drink. I choose not to drink, yall! I focus on the chance to laugh with my friends, listen to music, enjoy the night sky, hold my boyfriends hand...all the things I didn't notice when I was impaired.
Also, I suggest finding some recovery help that speaks to you (AVRT, SR, AA, Smart, etc) to motivate, educate, and comfort you. For every person on here is a different path to sobriety. Congrats on taking the important first step in moving forward with your life.
Also, I suggest finding some recovery help that speaks to you (AVRT, SR, AA, Smart, etc) to motivate, educate, and comfort you. For every person on here is a different path to sobriety. Congrats on taking the important first step in moving forward with your life.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 277
Welcome to SR, Freefall. Whatever you have been going through, all of us can relate to it and we have been through same hell.
You have taken a very important 1st step to open up and express that you have a problem. This is called " opening up " so that the monster ( Addictive Voice ) inside us , can be thrown out or killed. As you read more and more posts on SR, lots of facts will become clear to you. Keep reading and keep posting on SR .
You are just 24. You have a full life ahead of you. A precious life which is a priceless gift from God to us. We will not trade it for any price. Start loving your current life, the way it is. Accept everyone around you , as they are. Slowly , you will be at peace with yourselves. Best of luck and good wishes ..
You have taken a very important 1st step to open up and express that you have a problem. This is called " opening up " so that the monster ( Addictive Voice ) inside us , can be thrown out or killed. As you read more and more posts on SR, lots of facts will become clear to you. Keep reading and keep posting on SR .
You are just 24. You have a full life ahead of you. A precious life which is a priceless gift from God to us. We will not trade it for any price. Start loving your current life, the way it is. Accept everyone around you , as they are. Slowly , you will be at peace with yourselves. Best of luck and good wishes ..
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome FreeFallin10!
It's great that you're taking an honest look at your drinking. It can sneak up on you and slowly take control of your life.
I know you'll find lots of info and support here - it's been a life-saver for me!
It's great that you're taking an honest look at your drinking. It can sneak up on you and slowly take control of your life.
I know you'll find lots of info and support here - it's been a life-saver for me!
A girl can dream...
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Recovery Road
Posts: 388
Originally Posted by artsoul 
Welcome FreeFallin10!
It's great that you're taking an honest look at your drinking. It can sneak up on you and slowly take control of your life.
I know you'll find lots of info and support here - it's been a life-saver for me!
It's great that you're taking an honest look at your drinking. It can sneak up on you and slowly take control of your life.
I know you'll find lots of info and support here - it's been a life-saver for me!
I started drinking at 15 too and my story sounds very similar to your's. Except I waited until last month to join SR at the age of 45. Better late than never I say. You've realized what you need to do early in life so keep on track and do whatever you need to do so you don't wake up 20 years later and wonder "Why didn't I do this sooner?"
Support will always be here.
Help will always be here.
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