auden67

Today is my Day 7, which feels great. I've made a decision to never drink again, and I'm sticking to it. Still hard sometimes though. I realized that several times my boyfriend left the house to go to the store, and I didn't run to the fridge to down a couple of beers before he got back. I might have before. Changes!

Unfortunately, today is also the first day I am dealing with the depression that many of you are so familiar with in early sobriety. I don't have a desire to drink, and I know this will pass, but it's a challenge nonetheless. It started last night, as I started feeling emotional while, of all things, watching TV. I'd had a very productive but tiring day and was starting to slow down. I watched TV, and was suddenly acutely aware of everything I had missed. Movies I ignored, music, but then also friends and milestones and YEARS of always mentally distracted toward drinking. Even if I wasn't drinking, I'm fairly sure too much mental energy went into planning around drinking, anticipating it, coming down from it, or orchestrating complex sneaks and lies to be able to drink. I woke up overwhelmed and down.

I figure a lot of it is my brain chemistry getting back on track. I know from my research that the addicted brain is accustomed to being overly reinforced by the drug, and underreinforced by normal, natural reinforcers. I know I have to work up to a more balanced state. Anyone have any good tricks they learned, stories, of getting through this "blue" period?

Also, a guy tried to steal my phone from my hands at the train station today. I screamed and held on. I was checking SR when it happened. He was caught, and now in jail and being charged with attempted robbery. Thanks for looking out for me, in some small way.

Reed22

Congrats on Day 7 Auden!

Your mentions of rushing to the fridge to down a few beers and the mental energy spent sneaking around and devising complex lies and schemes to avoid getting exposed for drinking too much are all too familiar!

I am at that point too... I feel... tired I guess would be the word. I am just starting out at Day 1... Today is the first day I've come back to this site is quite a while.

I hope that we can both report many sober days ahead!!

walktheline1

I'm on day 28. The biggest thing that helped me through those first weeks was a supportive group (I used my friends and family, others use aa or similar), keeping busy, and excercise. I'm still not 100%, but I'm better than I was. And like you said, it takes time for our brains to readjust. Congrats on 7!

Hevyn

Great job on Day 7! It took me a few weeks to start feeling really hopeful, but every day I was a little better. It does feel like something's missing in the beginning - but I promise that feeling will fade, and you'll be so glad you're no longer numb & foggy.

I hated that sneaky stuff too - did plenty of hiding and lying. It's so nice to have that chapter of our lives behind us.

Congrats on Day 28, walktheline! Proud of you.

auden67

Thanks everyone! I really appreciate your responses. Exercise is a really good suggestion; I think I've been craving too much junk, and getting in a good routine will help with the down and fog of the first few days. Overall, it's been a wonderful experience, and plan to continue and work on it everyday. My tiny support team has been wonderful, and you all have been the knowledge and support to keep it up.

tzivia

Hi auden, I'm on day 7 also. Good luck to us both! I'm not feeling down, but I do have that feeling that Hevyn mentioned of something missing. It gives me hope that those of you who've been sober longer say that it starts getting better. I've never made it to 30 days in all of my quits, so I'm hoping by that point I'll start to notice a difference. I feel like if I can hang on til then, I can prove to myself that I can do this.

Also, I think I need to be prepared that depression could hit me too. I've never thought about it before, but I don't think I would have stayed sober if hit with that. Now that I know it's normal and goes away, I'm going to stick in there and not throw away my sobriety because of it if it happens.

Thanks for this thread. It has been super helpful to me.

Dee74

I think there's so good advice here Auden...I think a certain amount of readjustment is required and sometimes maybe even a little grieving for the past...but it is a finite period and you will get through it

I'm really glad you weren't hurt at the train station

D

dr4t7

Congrats on day 7! I am on day 5. Tomorrow is my birthday and I know I can make it through without having a drink.I made this last weekend a lot easier by just staying productive, getting projects done around the house etc... Keeping busy helped me a lot to stay positive and I got a lot of stuff finished that I definitely would not have if I would have drank last week.

Hevyn

What Dee said is so important, and some of us are hesitant to mention it. There is a grieving period for most when they first quit. It isn't instant sunshine & rainbows. After all, we're learning to live in a new way - without our buffer. Once the fog lifts we can see our new world begin to unfold. No more numbing ourselves or living in a zoned out state. No more hiding, deceiving, covering our tracks. We begin to feel free. It becomes so worth it!

Hevyn

Congratulations to tzivia for your Day 7 - and dr4t7 for your Day 5! So proud of you