Blew it
Blew it
So last night I was so depressed.. And just had to get out of the house.. Being 83 days sober and making some huge decisions lately.. Just felt overwhelmed and trapped in my house.. And since my x boyfriend took the tv.. Thought I'd go see a movie. So I went to sushi.. And sat there and ordered a Kirin light.. Stared at it and then poured myself a glass. Took three sips of it.. Tasted horrible! Then ordered a diet coke. Mad at myself this morning. Does this mean I have to start from day one again.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: North America
Posts: 1,628
how you count days is really up to you and your own knowledge of what is honest and true. what's really important is that you stopped yourself instead of being foolish and saying "well one sip means I screwed up, I might as well drink it all and get some more."
For me, early sobriety requires a lot of planning in terms of avoiding people, places, and things that will trigger you. Keeping these at a great distance recognizes my own flawed humanity and my openness to temptation and conditioned responces. You have learned something here, and not blown it whole hog. Take what you have learned, and move forward~~~~
glad you posted Yoga~~~~!
For me, early sobriety requires a lot of planning in terms of avoiding people, places, and things that will trigger you. Keeping these at a great distance recognizes my own flawed humanity and my openness to temptation and conditioned responces. You have learned something here, and not blown it whole hog. Take what you have learned, and move forward~~~~
glad you posted Yoga~~~~!
Miko and scrambeld.. Thank you for your responses.. I was down on myself this morning.. I was looking forward to getting my chip this Saturday for 90 days sobriety. Think I need to be honest with myself and start again from day one. I didn't recognize that it was more an act of strength then blowing it. Thank you for pointing that out that made me feel a lot better..
Days, chips, time, etc. is not that big a thing to me. Growth, is the really big thing. The real thing is that every day is day 1, the rest is history. It is making the best of this day that is important. I think you still deserver a 90 day chip if that is important to you, though I am sure there are some sick individuals with 10 years without a drink that would say you definitely do not. I don't place a lot of faith however in any group which still has to classify its meetings as smoking or non-smoking meetings. Is that the same as non-drinking addicts meetings and sobriety meetings? Sorry just rambling, but don't get down on yourself for your indiscretion. Learn and move forward.
Thank you totfit! I have been back and forth with meeting. Only been to to meetings in my whole sobriety. So not sure what works for me yet. I was doing so well cruising along. Then a bunch of **** happened..all at once got way overwhelming my old nature was to drink the pain away. I was staring at this beer.. Thinking do I want that crappy life again or do I want to move forward.. Glad I switched to diet coke and ate then went to my movie.. Men in black.. Will smith can always make me laugh.. Movie was cute thank you for replying
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 82
I don't think it is that big of a deal. If you want to start over, that is up to you. What you did reminds me of when I picked up the wrong glass when a few frinds were over. I picked up a glass and took a big swig thinking it was my diet coke. I got a mouthfull of Vodka and it tasted horrible, I almost did a spittake.
I drank on my 100th day. I have drank another two nights since then, not back to back. I don't like the taste of alcohol any longer and had one horrible hangover to remind me that alcohol no longer has a place in my life. I decided not to start over, it was a slip. But at six months sober, I no longer count the days either. It was very important to count for me though during my first 90 days.
I drank on my 100th day. I have drank another two nights since then, not back to back. I don't like the taste of alcohol any longer and had one horrible hangover to remind me that alcohol no longer has a place in my life. I decided not to start over, it was a slip. But at six months sober, I no longer count the days either. It was very important to count for me though during my first 90 days.
Wow, is it possible to leave a drink unfinished? After only 3 sips? You sure did show a lot of strength! Don't feel too badly, you must be really committed to your sobriety to be able to put down that drink. And right after a break-up too. You are a tough girl, hang in there.
My ex-sponsor would say you have to start over because you drank it. I say no dont start over. What you did is 10 times harder than not drinking. Taking a few drinks and stopping---holy crap! There is no way I could do that! Lets learn and have a good Sunday!
Yogagirl, friend, the strength and courage you have in taking a few sips and shoving it aside for a diet coke, then posting about it is beautiful! Tis only a flesh wound.
Your honesty with yourself and the friends of SR is something special. No matter the result of pin or no pin, you are still 83 days sober (not drunk, in this case) today. You go-ga-girl.
Now I'm hungry for suishi.
Your honesty with yourself and the friends of SR is something special. No matter the result of pin or no pin, you are still 83 days sober (not drunk, in this case) today. You go-ga-girl.
Now I'm hungry for suishi.
Thank you all and crew ( my buddy) for your responses. It really helps me. And writing about it helps me too. My mom once said to me you can write a novel about how you feel and your life but you babble when you talk and don't make much sense.. Then of course I always have that nervous giggle when I'm uncomfortable..so talking in meetings is difficult for me. This site helps me a lot and I thank you again for responding.. Now I feel proud I walked away from it.. Diet coke tastes so much better anyways.. And the sushi was amazing.. Maybe next time I won't sit at the actual bar and order from a table..that was an old habit of mine sushi saki Kirin light.. Doing shots of saki with the sushi guy saying Kung pi or whatever it is they say.. Glad it didn't go that far.. Glad I stopped myself and realized I didn't wanna go that path. Funny I envisioned my night if I didn't stop myself and so glad I didn't pursue it. Would have a hot mess..yikes.
I agree with much of what has been said here. You didnt finish the drink....you only took a few sips and then pushed it aside. I would not have been able to do that. You should consider your sobriety intact.
You just ran through a burning house while covered in gasoline and came out unharmed. I hope you know better than to tempt fate like that again.
You just ran through a burning house while covered in gasoline and came out unharmed. I hope you know better than to tempt fate like that again.
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