Newbie
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
((hope)) - Welcome to SR! I lurked here for over 2 years..got some clean time (I'm a recovering crack addict), went back out, repeat. I wasn't ready, but when I finally WAS ready? I knew right where to come. I had never been on a forum, so didn't sign in here until I had 6 months clean.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 568
If you try to moderate, I really hope it works out for you. I've tried it numerous times and always end up losing control. And over the years I find myself drinking more frequently, in greater quantities, and earlier. So I'm not one of the lucky ones who can handle moderation, which is why I'm here. Whatever you decide to do, there is a lot of great support on this forum and no one here will judge you. Welcome!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 282
I do 12 hour night and day shifts hope. On my work days (2 a week) alcohol didn't cross my mind either. I loved it too but worried about my health and my quantaties. White wine was my drink of choice too and I could sometimes get up to two bottles in an evening be only slightly drunk and wake up without a hang over. Test yourself if u want. Go a week without and see how u feel. It's only a week. If u are like me realizing how addicted I actually was was pretty scary. Irritability was the extent of my withdrawals but the cravings and obsessions were the killer. All the best in what u choose to do 
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: US East Coast
Posts: 14,286
Welcome, Hope63! I can relate to everything you're saying. I was a white wine drinker. For 14 years I managed to have one or two glasses per year. The problem for me is that once I'm really stressed, as I have been in the past year, I slide right back into it. For the past year I kept thinking I could limit it to one or two glasses per evening. I even succeeded most evenings because I would go out every day in the late afternoon and buy a couple of 1-glass bottles or the 3-glass "boxes" and limit it that way. But then all of a sudden I'd buy a bottle of wine and drink most or all of it.
I finally decided it was easier to quit totally than live with the constant stress of trying to keep to my limits.
Yesterday was Day 5 for me and I had wine again in the evening. Today I'm embarrassed but realize the best thing is to go right back to staying sober.
There is a small part of our brains that acts like a feedback loop and for those of us who can't just take it or leave it as far as alcohol (and there are many, many of us, the chemicals produced in our brains when we drink result in production of other substances in the brain which then reinforce that feedback loop - and that results in cravings when we stop.
In my case, I have cirrhosis of the liver. If I don't strop drinking I may be in liver failure within 5 years and I am too old to have a liver transplant.
You are the only one who can decide what you are going to do. I wouldn't presume to judge anyone else's actions other than my own and I'm finally learning to be kinder and gentler with myself.
Whatever you decide to do, try to just take it one day at a time.
I finally decided it was easier to quit totally than live with the constant stress of trying to keep to my limits.
Yesterday was Day 5 for me and I had wine again in the evening. Today I'm embarrassed but realize the best thing is to go right back to staying sober.
There is a small part of our brains that acts like a feedback loop and for those of us who can't just take it or leave it as far as alcohol (and there are many, many of us, the chemicals produced in our brains when we drink result in production of other substances in the brain which then reinforce that feedback loop - and that results in cravings when we stop.
In my case, I have cirrhosis of the liver. If I don't strop drinking I may be in liver failure within 5 years and I am too old to have a liver transplant.
You are the only one who can decide what you are going to do. I wouldn't presume to judge anyone else's actions other than my own and I'm finally learning to be kinder and gentler with myself.
Whatever you decide to do, try to just take it one day at a time.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by Hope63 
really ashamed to admit this on here but just being truthful. Maybe I don't want this enough
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Hi Hope
My drinking defined me - I couldn't imagine not drinking....I tried every permutation of cutting back, resting, taking days off....I'm sure you've tried a few things too.
The trouble was, despite my good intentions (and they were good) once I drank they all went out the window.
That's why I ultimately decided moderation wasn't for me, and most people here have reached that same conclusion.
If you look around here, you'll find hundreds - thousands even - of happy satisfied people who used to never believe they could live without alcohol - but it is possible....and I can assure you personally... I didn't lose out on the deal at all
It wasn't all rose petals along the way sure - change is hard sometimes...but this is a great community with a lot of support - and I've never regretted stopping drinking - I've gained so much....I have my life and the old me back....
I hope you decide you're ready to try soon
D
My drinking defined me - I couldn't imagine not drinking....I tried every permutation of cutting back, resting, taking days off....I'm sure you've tried a few things too.
The trouble was, despite my good intentions (and they were good) once I drank they all went out the window.
That's why I ultimately decided moderation wasn't for me, and most people here have reached that same conclusion.
If you look around here, you'll find hundreds - thousands even - of happy satisfied people who used to never believe they could live without alcohol - but it is possible....and I can assure you personally... I didn't lose out on the deal at all
It wasn't all rose petals along the way sure - change is hard sometimes...but this is a great community with a lot of support - and I've never regretted stopping drinking - I've gained so much....I have my life and the old me back....
I hope you decide you're ready to try soon
D
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: London
Posts: 1,384
Originally Posted by Hope63
Thanks for that, truth is I love drinking .........white wine especially and only really want to stop because I worry about the effects on my health. I only ever drink in an evening never in the day, and believe a lot of it is habitual with me as when I work nights which i regularly do I don't even think about having a drink !However I cannot imagine life without alcohol :-(
Its an illusion/myth Brainwashing.
May I recommend Alan Carr easyway to stop drinking.
I think you really want to stop more than you will admit ?
It gets worse if you carry on, the obsession and thoughts about your health being damaged will always be there plus worsening hangovers and moods.
Life without Alcohell is liberating.
Stick around on this forum read posts and post.
Good luck !
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