Mm1231xx

Hi, my name is Marie and I'm an alcoholic addict. I just got home from my first meeting in years. This is my first day sober. I've been through this before, but I wasn't at rock bottom last time. Last night I finally understood what rock bottom means. I am powerless over alcohol. I always think, "Oh, I have a few weeks sober I can handle it now!" No. Never. One is neverrrrr enough. The past few weeks I've lost my friends, my car keys, money, other random things, and most of all, the trust and respect my family had for me. But today is the start to a new life. Tomorrow I have a detox appointment and I will be there for about 5 days. I'm really REALLY scared because today I have been withdrawing like I couldn't believe... Shaking, anxiety, sweating, itchy palms, I can't wait to go though so I can get over this hump. Then afterwards I will be going to 90 meetings in 90 days. I can do this. I NEED to do this.

HitRockBottom70

Mm,
I hope someone is with you because withdrawl can be very serious. Were you an all day every day drinker?
HRB

fight

ive been sober, booze for 5 yrs, but relapsed on white bad ... ever need an ear im here

Deserto

Congrats on 1 day Marie, and welcome to SR! You'll find lots of good support here.

It's good you're going into detox tomorrow, but don't be afraid to go to the ER if things take a turn for the worse tonight. Detoxing at home can be dangerous.

Looking forward to hearing more from you.

DisplacedGRITS

The 90 in 90 sounds daunting but can really be fun actually. I wish i'd made it that far but i let a vacation derail me. I made it to around Day 50 something and went to several days of double and triple meetings. You start getting to know people there and the community is just great (like here!) Welcome to SR!

Sapling

Everybody needs to do this...You have to want to do this....Hang around before and after meetings with people WORKING the program...Study the book...Get a sponsor and get working the steps....That's the recovery. Meetings are great...I love em...Those steps saved and changed my life...If that's what you are looking for...That's how it works.

Dee74

welcome to you both Marie and Fight
There's lot of support here
D

Jitterbugg

Hi Marie,
I think most of us here know what you are going through. Good luck in detox! You'll come out thinking clear and ready to move on with life.

eh1988

Welcome!!! Yea I think everyone knows at least half of what you're going through. I personally have never gone to detox but I know it's the best way to cleanse your system. Trust me, you don't want to do it alone like I did......Thought I was going to die....I could have died...

karilynn27

Marie and you too fight.
SR has become a huge part of my recovery. I'm glad you've got a detox program. The meetings are fantastic and if you don't like the first one you go to find another. This is a huge step and you should be proud of yourself.
:ghug3
K

JimJim

Hey Welcome! I found that I also came to I point I felt I NEEDED to give up, It was when I knew this time that I WILL give up.

sugarbear1

Welcome to SR!

Glad you are here!

sissy07

Welcome to SR!

Mm1231xx

Thank you everyone it means a lot to me!! Here's the thing. The detox program I was going to had amazing reviews from everyone I talked to about it. Yet, when I went in at 9pm last night, they sent me home. The reason was even though my blood pressure was through the roof and I was complaining about chest pains from the withdrawal, there was no alcohol in my blood anymore so they couldn't medically clear me as an alcoholic. So, since this took about 4 hours, I didn't have anyone who was awake to drive me home, so I had to pay $40 for a cab :/ (as if alcohol didnt already waste all my money, so is getting clean), And it made me want to use because I pretty much thought I was failing at getting help and when I fail I drink. But I didnt! I went home, and today my mom and I were fighting all day and it made me want to go out but I DIDNT!! I went to a meeting instead. But, the meeting isn't there anymore even though it was on the website. Like are you EFFING kidding me?!?!??!?!? But instead of drinking at the bar across the street I went and bought a Little Caesars pizza to reward myself for making an effort LOL. Now I am sitting at home and I don't feel like using. I know I will pry feel like it again tomorrow, but a friend I met at my Monday AA meeting told me about a meeting that is every day at noon not too far from where I live. So YAYYY at least I will FINALLY get to another meeting!!! Thanks again for everyone's support!

sugarbear1

Good for you, Marie! Call the local AA intergroup office, they are there to direct you to a meeting. See where one exists.

I'm excited for you! Keep staying strong and stay stopped!!

Hugs,

Sapling

Stay strong Marie...Just don't pick up no matter what. I did a lot of fighting with my mom...or anyone else my first few weeks...Trying out my new emotions without alcohol...That gets better like everything else...Hang in there...Keep doing what you're doing. Try this site out...Get to as many meetings as you can...Read the Big Book. That was my Bible. You're doing great. I found when that "Here comes an arguement" feeling hit me...Saying the Serenity Prayer helped me a lot.

Meetings in Chicagoland Area | Chicago AA | AA Meetings Chicago | Chicago Alcoholics Anonymous

MalkavianEmily

Welcome to SR.

Chrisy

welcome, so glad you are here.

heath480

Welcome to SR.Enjoy the meeting.

fight

congratulations! I just did an amazing meeting ! got a sponsor and am off to read big book tonight... took some time and the first few days are sooooo hard!
i left behind all of my old life to build a new life and so far its working, i could stress about alot of worry but , we need to focus on the positive future! new sober friends, good surroundings... I wish you the best !