Sapling

Prayers are with you brother. Hang in there.

eh1988

Thank you Sapling. I'm holding on as hard as I can but I really hate this ride

luckyfosho

Relaspe, I've relasped about five times in nine year. It has not been easy for me. I keep trying. That's what you have to do. I struggle constantly. Don't give up learn something from your relaspe you face issues in recovery take everything you can from it so if your faced with it agin you wil be ready amd it does not have to lead to relaspe. I..... I'm learning this

Hevyn

eh - Check in when you get chance. I'm sorry for what you've been though, but this can be the last time. Now you know (again) that drinking only leads to misery. There's no comfort or help to be found there. I wish I'd known that at 23. You're going to make it.

Luling

I'm really sorry for your loss. I'm glad you're going to go talk to your pastor and going to a meeting; these sound like excellent steps. Hang in there!

jsch

Prayers are with you. Sorry to hear about your loss. Your mind is on the right track. Get back into it.

eh1988

Thanks guys. Had a talk with my pastor and some of it hit me. Still trying to figure out how to stop this from happening again.

eh1988

Meeting went ok but to be honest AA is weird for me. I haven't found anyone I really can talk to... Or trust talking to about my personal problems.

Dee74

I think any new experience - be it AA, or counselling, or a new church or whatever - is probably going to be weird for a while tho, eh.

It's probably worth a second go?

D

Purplecatlover

Eh,sorry for this tragedy. I hope you can get through your grief & comfort your Gf. But you don't have to do this ever again.
You must believe deep down with every fiber of your being that alcohol will NEVER be your friend EVER.
No matter what lies it tells, no matter what circumstances occur in your life, it won't help anything but only complicate, compound & add more devastation to your pain & problems.
You just learned this. Keep it at the forefront of your mind ALWAYS.

I wish I stopped drinking at 23. I could've saved myself ALOT & I mean ALOT of pain.
You can do this, you've already done it for 3 months, keep going, don't look back.

eh1988

It has to be. My girl won't let me flake on tomorrows meeting. Cooking her dinner right now.... Lasagna. Picked something that will take up a lot of my time. I've probably apologized to her a hundred times... She told Me to stop saying that, I guess she's just that kinda person that doesn't need an apology. She just wants to help. God I love her... She has literally saved my life.

akazia21

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know how it is to turn to alcohol when you hear bad news. When I found out I had cancer that was the first thing I did, unfortunately my bender lasted months rather than one day. It only made things worse for me...alcohol never makes anything better.
I'm glad you are putting it behind you and being there for your girlfriend. I had a miscarriage when I was younger at three months along. It wasn't easy at the time and I thought I would never have children, but now I have a 5 year old daughter now who is the love of my life. You sound like you have a great solid relationship with her -don't let alcohol take that away from you.

artsoul

I'm so sorry, eh - I think any of us could have reacted the same way in early sobriety. It can feel overwhelming when something like this happens. Our knee-jerk reaction is to get rid of the pain, but you both can come out of this stronger if you can allow the feelings to be there and go through it together.

Sounds like you have love in your life, which is a real blessing, and you have 30 days of sobriety for a foundation going forward. Be good to yourself and enjoy dinner!:ghug3

eh1988

Akazia. I'm so sorry to hear about your illness. Hope you're doing ok