SarahK2012

I messed up and started drinking again after 3 weeks sober. Those 3 weeks were the longest I had been sober in years and I felt like I had beaten the cravings and problem. How naive.

I decided to allow myself the daily maximum limit which seemed to be okay for a while, surely I wasn't an alcoholic if I stuck to the RDA. Then gradually this ended up a bottle some nights because it was the weekend, we were out etc, and last Friday after work I just completely lost it, humiliated myself and my partner again in front of our work colleagues, and I'm probably glad I don't remember what exactly I did but I know how bad it was. I feel like I was possessed and my partner was so shocked and finally seems to see that I do genuinely have a problem. It really seems so hard for someone who is not an alcoholic to understand what it is like.

Anyway, I feel like I have been taught a big lesson, and will start again a sober life. It was so much fun drinking again and feeling relaxed, but the hangover on Saturday put everything back into perspective.

This picture seems to sum it up perfectly,

Healthyfood

SarahK2012

Well done on 3 weeks! Try it again and try to stay off longer.

Its easier to stay clean than start again from day 1 at least for me.

BillyPilgrim

Its a lesson we all learn Sarah

The first drink does the damage

2 simple rules to stop that

1 Dont have the first drink
2 Consult rule 1

BP

hypochondriac

Many of us have repeated that process ad nauseum Sarah, well done for breaking the cycle!

What's your plan for staying quit?

Jeni26

Glad you're back Sarah x. We hear it so many times don't we, thinking that we can just have one, but as Billy says, it's the first one that does the damage.
So glad you're back on board with us. Keep posting xxx

Soberween

The part where you say "it was so much fun drinking again and feeling relaxed," well, that will in time go away. It will not be any fun whatsoever and more a requirement to function. Remember, this is a progressive disease. It will only get worse.

Enough of the preachiness on my part though. Good job on breaking the cycle. A lot of alcoholics would continue to drink. I'm glad you are giving sobriety a chance.

Zencat

That's how it done for a once hopeless out of control alcoholic like me: relearning how to live life alcohol free.

It really takes a lot of fortitude to make drastic lifestyle changes. I'm glad to see your up to the challenge. Keep making the necessary changes that will keep you on the sober path. Good job on catching this relapse and returning to recovery. You can do this!

JJB

snap! I did exactly the same. Nearly three weeks without a drink and convinced myself it woulde be ok to drink again and at first it seemed to be the case. But as usual it crept up again and I ended up doing something very embarrassing/hurtful, three days ago.

Trying to see the positive side of it , my partner who was also involved has now seen what a problem this is for me and we have both seen that I really have to focus on my sobriety and nothing else.

Maybe the three weeks sober time somehow helped in the learning process that followed. It wasn't a waste of time .

Now I start each day reading a bit from the BB book. I've decided to read it everyday even BEFORE I feel any pull towards drinking. Have just read chapter one again . It makes me feel less alone. Coming on here has a similar effect, especially reading your post with which I identified so closely.

So thanks for sharing your experience and good luck for the minutes, days, hours, weeks and life to come.

sugarbear1

What's a daily maximum limit? In the US it's one drink for females per 24 hours.

Dee74

welcome back Sarah

D