Alcoholic Sharing Experience
 

Last Wednesday I went to the emergency room because I couldnt handle dealing with my alcoholism anymore. I had been binging too many weeks and my anxiety was insane. I am a 29 year old guy crying in a hospital emergency room because of what my alcoholism has done to me.
I'm 29 and I've been drinking since I was 18. Always had a problem, I never know when to stop drinking- drinking when bored, etc. Within the past year my drinking has become worse. When I'm not working I like to isolate myself inside my apartment and drink.
When I went to the hospital it was wierd to actually talk to other people about my drinking and they understood and were not judgemental.
It was the first push I needed to get help. They helped me find a facility nearby.
My biggest fear was that noone would understand my drinking or would not want to help me... (especially as a guy).
But people care and as soon as you open up and are honest things begin to feel so much better.
I have admitted to several people in the past week that I am an alcoholic for the first time- and while its hard, everyone has been so helpful and understanding.

People DO understand what you are going through.
There are people that can help you.

Ive only been sober for a week but for me this has been a game changer:
-admitting to others I have an alcohol problem
-joining a recovery program

Are you going to AA meetings CloudStrife?

I has a similiar experience when I finally gave up trying to quit by myself and went to AA. The fellowship of meeting with other people struggling with the same problem really helped me.

I havent been to an AA meeting yet.
While I don't think AA is the best solution for me to stay sober I still want to go to meetings and meet other people who are dealing with the same problem.

Then I think that is what you should do. If you want to go...Go. It sure won't hurt you. All you need to go is a desire to stop drinking...Sounds like you have that. You never know...Maybe after meeting some of those nice people that solution they have might grow on you. If not...Enjoy the meetings.

Great post - Thanks for sharing that, CloudStrife!

BRAVE.

Thanks for your example!

That is what I found so comforting when I walked into AA. Somebody finally understood the misery I put myself through and it was so nice talking to others that carried the same burden. The difference between them and me was sobriety. Some of these guys had 6 months, or 4 years, or 20 years but yet I knew they were legit by hearing them discuss what it was like.

I never could figure out why I didn't drink like other people. I had two friends that drank way more than me, and everyone else drank less. I was either judging the two that drank more saying "What a couple of drunks. They should slow down". Or I was saying to the majority that didn't drink like me "You guys are lame, live a little, let's get after it, etc..."

What I see in AA is a group of people that would not normally mix. You have literally all cross sections of life but what binds us together are our stories. Today I was at a meeting and there was a 60 something year old lady who was describing what it was like when she drank and it was literally like she was in my head. I identified with her completely.

When I drink, I'm living a lie. The lie that this time it will be different. That this time I won't drink that stuff, with those people, at those places, during that time of day. Every single time I get the same results.

You are not alone man. Keep coming here and reaching out. Nobody understands an alcoholic like and alcoholic.

Best of luck!

Cloudstrife,

Great post. Stop wasting time, and make this it. How I wish I would have wised up at 29....

Sobriety rocks. It is like living life in reality, a reality that you can make good and happy, because you are comfortable in your own skin. It just kind of evolves.

I have a lot of respect for you that you just walked into an ER and asked for help. You can do this. And you can have a great, healthy life. Go for it! I wish you the very best.

I may not be a 12 stepper, I do however attend open AA meeting for the same reason you are planning to do. The best solution that has made the biggest difference in my life as an ex-drinker is a secular recovery program.

There is more that one way to be recovered from alcoholism. I encourage to discover a way to live free from alcohol that honors your worldview.

How wonderful to hear of your positive experience in hospital. And well done to you for owning up to your problem and facing it. Recovery is a beautiful place - I recommend the support of other alcoholics to get there, whether you subscribe to their system of recovery or not, Fellowships are awesome for support in difficult times.

Commit to your recovery and work on changiong your thought patterns that lead to relapse and unhappiness and you'll be on the right track.

Hi CloudStrife, congrats on your sobriety. The first time I admitted I was an alcoholic I broke down and cried. It was so hard to admit it. But admitting it was the beginning of my healing. Welcome to SoberRecovery. I'm looking forward to reading more of your posts.

Glad you opened up. Give the meetings a shot because honestly you cant say it isnt for you, you have not even been yet. :)

As we say your way got you to that ER try something else now. :)