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-   -   Weekend binger, pot smoker (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/256186-weekend-binger-pot-smoker.html)

Butterfly112 05-07-2012 12:47 PM

Weekend binger, pot smoker
 
Hi There

I am new to this site, and want to introduce myself. I am a 32 year old mother of one. I have a wonderful man in my life and a beautiful home. I am very active physically and to the general public I look like I have it all together, and some people actually look up to me because of my enthusiasm for physical activity and my social front. But inside I feel like I am just waiting to go home to use. I am basically just sober for work and then after work, I am another person. I am addicted to booze and pot. I binge drink on the weekends and don’t usually drink during the week, but I smoke a lot of pot to manage. I am not sure which one I am most addicted to. I have been using both since 12 years old, and it was really fun up until a few years ago. I am at a point where I feel like a prisoner of my addiction and I dread the weekends to come because I know this weekend I will not be able to be sober like I plan to EVERY WEEK. Everyone I talk to says I don’t have a problem because I don’t black out and stuff, but I do. I guess you can say I am a functioning addict. I have the same problem as my father, he glorified these things when I was a child, I thought he was my hero, and now I am addicted to the same stuff as him. He is now 56 without a pot to **** in, and his brain is not working right……I am here because I don’t want to turn out like him.

sugarbear1 05-07-2012 01:13 PM

Big Book On Line

Read the first 43 pages, including the Roman Numeral pages. See if you can relate to anything. The textbook is the first 164 pages.

I'm an alcoholic. I smoked pot, too. My alcoholism showed up in my pot use. Alcoholism has little to do with alcohol/pot. Alcohol and pot was my solution. I needed to feel okay with the world (some call it stress, whatever).

Alcoholism doesn't know functioning or non-functioning. Even those who aren't working function quite well to obtain their money for their drink/pot/whatever.

Alcoholism doesn't know wealth or status; it does not discriminate. It has no age limit.

Do you drink/smoke for the effect? Do you get a feeling of "Ahhhhhhhhhh" when it hits the spot? Do you keep drinking/smoking once you had the first drink/hit? Does it make you feel okay within your own skin?

Read that book (click on a chapter to read it--I just found out the stories are on this link, too!).

Stick around here, try not to drink/drug tonight, but if you do, it's okay. Until you find another solution, that will work for now.

I wish you sobriety!
Hugs,

coming_clean 05-07-2012 01:21 PM

Pot is my DOC.

welcome,

keep posting,

ReadyAndAble 05-07-2012 01:29 PM

Welcome to SR, Butterfy. You'll find a lot of support here. It's good you're taking action, because it seems to always get worse as time goes by. Eventually the "functioning" label falls by the wayside. You're going to spare yourself and your child a world of misery by stopping now. :)

Dee74 05-07-2012 02:12 PM

Welcome Butterfly :)

I started that way too - pot and alcohol - work me was fine and upstanding...after work me was a hot mess....and got worse and worse....and worse

I think it's great you're here looking for support :)

D

artsoul 05-07-2012 07:17 PM

Welcome Butterfly!

I can relate to your story...... I should have known something was wrong when the highlight of my day was knowing I could start drinking after 5:00.

Glad you're here - there really is life after alcohol!:c031:

Hooped 05-07-2012 07:30 PM

Glad you are here.

I'm an alcoholic/pothead myself but I did manage to string together 8 months sober recently and actually found that once the sobriety kicked in my desire to smoke pot virtually disappeared.

Not saying the same will happen to you but that was my experience.

It was like not drinking became an actual high for me in itself and I had no desire to smoke up.

Welcome to SR, there are some wonderful people here.

kidwandering 05-07-2012 07:41 PM

I actually use pot to help get me through tough withdrawals, but your relationship it may be more destructive. Try to stay positive with yourself, and others, and maybe one day you'll wake up and think, ya know, I'm not gonna use today. Then, maybe you can do that again the next day! Good luck with everything!

Livinday2day 05-08-2012 07:01 AM

Butterfly, try giving up the pot first. I smoked up every day for years and years then 2 years ago last November I just stopped (mainly for financial reasons) and other than a little insomnia for a few nights it was easy! I don't think pot is really addictive, but just a habit we get into. I don't even think of smoking up any more. Maybe if you gave it up it would give you a clearer mind to help tackle your more serious addiction. Good luck and remember, one day at a time


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