Anyone else lie constantly when drinking?
 

For the life of me I can't figure out why I do, but I just do. I lie about stupid stuff. I'll say I went to one place when I didn't, or tell my buddy I'll call him back and I won't. Or tell my wife I'll call on a bill and not do it. Or tell my boss that I'll call on a company and won't. Or tell my sister I'll do something and then don't... Just flakey as hell...

You know when I started drinking again it was simple. Take everything I learned when sober, all the hours spent on this site, all the AA meetings, all the podcasts, etc... just take all of that knowledge and hold on to it - and at night, maybe once or twice a week, just drink in the evenings. What could go wrong???

Well for some reason, when I drink alcohol it's like an entire personality shift. I start living in the shadows, getting dishonest, not following through on things, isolating, and basically changing as a person. It's little by little. Just little white lies day in day out that eat at my soul and make me feel bad. That bad feeling I have inside me grows and grows until I can't take it anymore and need to quiet it with booze. I then drink booze, get that swagger back, then think feeling bad for lying is stupid (cuz EVERYONE lies) justify my bad behavior, then wake up hungover, full of anxiety, shame, remorse, etc... and over and over again...

It feels so good to be back on the recovery path again. I know I've said this before, but this time I mean it. I also know I've said that before, but this time I really, really, really mean it.

Today is Day 4 for me. I wish you all the best. :c031:

Good to have you back Reggie, you inspired me when I first came.

Let me ask you Reggie...I know you had some time in AA...Did you ever work the steps with a sponsor?

Alkies tend not to follow through with things, but they sure like to make commitments! We manipulate, lie and steal, even if that stealing is time......

You aren't alone, reggie!

Oh...As far as lying goes...I lied like a rug....I always liked the lies I didn't even remember....I said that?

HI REGGIE!

Yep. Sneaking. Lying. Hiding.

Feels great to wake up without that shame and remorse.

Glad you're back, congrats on day 4!

I always said, the first thing you do when you take a drink is lie. It seems like if you don't lie to someone else you at least lie to yourself. Sometimes I think the lie, to yourself, comes before the drink. You lie to yourself and say,,,, "I can handle it this time". Deep down you know you can't, but for some crazy reason you like the lie, and then you drink.

LMAO Reggie...your question implies the exception. You should have asked the other way around if you wanted strange responses. Meaning, anyone completely honest while drinking? I sure as hell wasn't. The more i drank, the better I lied. Like Dr. Evil's father, at one point when drunk, I started making outlandish claims like I invented the question mark (ok joking about the question mark, but I did tell somebody once that I designed Ford's Fuel Injection system). I don't even know what a carburetor is.

"I'm telling you honey...I only had two beers."

What frances said. :) Yes, indeed.

LMAO, that was one of the lies I was thinking about when I posted. Normies don't lie about how mush they drink

Sponsor to sponsee: "How do you know when an alcoholic is lying?"
Sponsee: "How?" Sponsor: "When their lips are moving."

That was an automatic response for me...I don't care how trashed I was.

The lie was 4 beers not 2.......when in fact it was closer to 8 - 10.

If you drink a 40 oz, does that only count as "one beer"?

You know something funny, I drank like a fish for years and years, and I never drank a quart or a 40. Although one time I did have a mug poured from a quart back in about 1981.

In college I couldn't hold my liquor. We used to buy 40's, and I'd puke maybe 12oz in. Roll the clock forward 20 years, and I probably still couldn't drink a 40. But give me 6 Pints of guinness, and I would wax poetic about the virtues of their hops. Oh, and that it was a low calorie beer. Hmmm...6 Pints x (16oz) - 96oz. Not a 40 though.

The first time I drank at 16 years old in 1977 I had 2 beers. The room spun and I puked my guts out. I cried "God make this stop" all night.

You would have thought I would have never taken another drink. But here is what I thought, I had a plan,,,,,,,, I figured if I drank more, I'd learn how to drink right. In my crazy head, I figured it was like learning to ride a bicycle, I thought I just needed to dust myself off and get back on and ride.

You know the "plan" probably would have worked if I had died at about 30 like I always figured. But the motorcycle wreck at 100 mph + or the airplane crash never happened. By 40 I was a really F ed up drunk with lots of problems.

Funny how the stinkin thinkin works isn't it?

Amen

I did have a sponsor. Great guy but not real "hands on". I only met with him and worked steps twice in 6 months. Not blaming it on him but that was our arrangement. This time I have a different plan. Meeting at least once per week with another guy. He's sponsored a few of my friends and they all are doing well.

So we'll see how it goes...

Great post. I can relate, just find that drinking would change the priority of things in my head, what was important sober becomes no longer important, my intentions no longer would be good. All in all a big mess. Not drinking now and starting to clean up my messes, feels good to be in control of my life right now!