Great Article
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Join Date: Jun 2011
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Great Article
I just read this and found it very interesting. Especially since I quit drinking without AA or any other formal program it's interesting to hear someone else's take on getting sober on your own. I especially liked his point about telling people that you have a problem with alcohol and that you want and need their help in quitting.
My Secret to Getting Sober - WSJ.com
Have a nice day, everyone.
My Secret to Getting Sober - WSJ.com
Have a nice day, everyone.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 96
Of course now I am reading the comments and a lot of people are very critical of him because of his comments about AA. I still think it's an interesting read and honestly, whatever worked for him to get sober and stay that way for two and a half years, well, good for him.
I am coming up on one year at the end of this month, so things are going pretty well for me. I did try multiple AA meetings and always felt uncomfortable, decided it wasn't for me. But I know plenty of people that wouldn't have been able to get or stay sober without it, so, really, whatever works!
I am coming up on one year at the end of this month, so things are going pretty well for me. I did try multiple AA meetings and always felt uncomfortable, decided it wasn't for me. But I know plenty of people that wouldn't have been able to get or stay sober without it, so, really, whatever works!
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Join Date: Sep 2010
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Step Twelve: Forget Everything You've Just Read
If it worked for me, it can work for anyone, right? Wrong. The chances that any of the advice here will work for you are vanishingly slim. So, too, are the chances that reading "How to Win Friends and Influence People" will result in your doing either of those things. In truth, all self-help guides are guaranteed to work only for one person: the person who wrote them.
The real secret to getting sober, and to repairing all the broken aspects of your life, is to take the time (probably through trial and error) to figure out the causes of your addiction and the aspects of your character that can be pressed into service in curing them. To do that, you'll have to figure out your own list of things you enjoy about drinking (for me: adventures, reckless spending, dating, etc.) and how you can keep those things alive through sobriety. Then you need to figure out what part of your personality will drive you to stay sober (for me: ego).
And then, as every recovering addict will tell you, it's simply a question of taking one step at a time.
If it worked for me, it can work for anyone, right? Wrong. The chances that any of the advice here will work for you are vanishingly slim. So, too, are the chances that reading "How to Win Friends and Influence People" will result in your doing either of those things. In truth, all self-help guides are guaranteed to work only for one person: the person who wrote them.
The real secret to getting sober, and to repairing all the broken aspects of your life, is to take the time (probably through trial and error) to figure out the causes of your addiction and the aspects of your character that can be pressed into service in curing them. To do that, you'll have to figure out your own list of things you enjoy about drinking (for me: adventures, reckless spending, dating, etc.) and how you can keep those things alive through sobriety. Then you need to figure out what part of your personality will drive you to stay sober (for me: ego).
And then, as every recovering addict will tell you, it's simply a question of taking one step at a time.
Perhaps a more appropriate title for the article would be "Reflections on how I got sober"
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Colorado Springs, Colorado
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Congrats on your upcoming one year of sobriety. And thanks for the terrific article! I too liked his wry self deprecating humor.
I find that many folks think one size fits all, and will keep try to squeeze round people all into the same square approach. Don't get me wrong, one size does fit all . . . of that one size, just not all sizes. For the rest we have to take them in, or let them out in different places, for each different body shape.
He approached his sobriety in his own way, and it worked. I used AA for the beginning and along with SR both have been a major part of my recovery. I emphatically agree with his assertion that quitting publicly is important.
Again, congrats!
I find that many folks think one size fits all, and will keep try to squeeze round people all into the same square approach. Don't get me wrong, one size does fit all . . . of that one size, just not all sizes. For the rest we have to take them in, or let them out in different places, for each different body shape.
He approached his sobriety in his own way, and it worked. I used AA for the beginning and along with SR both have been a major part of my recovery. I emphatically agree with his assertion that quitting publicly is important.
Again, congrats!
So it goes
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Manchester UK
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Congratulations on one year daisy. I think the thrust of the article is right, whatever works for you.
I like Step one of AA (I am powerless over alcohol, however I have a cunning plan now, I just dont drink it, take that puny alcohol!!!)
Telling people is important, as is not making promises to yourself or anyone that you wont drink. I just dont intend to drink now, I think actions speak much louder than words.
Dont care how anyone gets sober, just like to see them sober.
I like Step one of AA (I am powerless over alcohol, however I have a cunning plan now, I just dont drink it, take that puny alcohol!!!)
Telling people is important, as is not making promises to yourself or anyone that you wont drink. I just dont intend to drink now, I think actions speak much louder than words.
Dont care how anyone gets sober, just like to see them sober.
SoberOutlook
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 3,089
I think the reasons one drinks and continues to do so to oblivion vary from one person to the other. Similarly, we all have different backgrounds and histories in every way. What makes us similar is that we reached our fill; our limit of what we can or want to handle with booze. For me, it was no longer possible to keep checking out of life on a daily basis. I could see it was killing me and those around me. My only option to sobriety, in my twisted mind at the end of my drinking, was to check out permanantly, but I was too chicken for that.
It does matter how we get sober...to the extent that we are able to stay sober, and to grow past any underlying issues we may have, which is different for each. Thats why I like SR. We can all learn from each other regardless of our individual dogma.
Good thread. I learned by it. And congrats on your year, Daisy!
It does matter how we get sober...to the extent that we are able to stay sober, and to grow past any underlying issues we may have, which is different for each. Thats why I like SR. We can all learn from each other regardless of our individual dogma.
Good thread. I learned by it. And congrats on your year, Daisy!
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This quote below by the author resonated well with me.
If being powerless over alcohol were absolute, yes an alcoholic would be completely unable to stop drinking under any and all circumstances until death.
Please. You may be weak against alcohol, or seriously addicted to it, but powerless? No. If a drinker were truly powerless, then AA would be useless to him; nothing short of death could stop him from drinking.
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Originally Posted by Zencat 
If being powerless over alcohol were absolute, yes an alcoholic would be completely unable to stop drinking under any and all circumstances until death.
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Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
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Originally Posted by Sapling
How come it works for so many people then? Worldwide.
However conditional powerless is not absolute. That through some means powerlessness that is conditional can be subject to change.
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Originally Posted by Zencat
I understand absolute powerless as free from limitation, complete, unchanging and independent of any restriction. Not subject to change.
However conditional powerless is not absolute. That through some means powerlessness that is conditional can be subject to change.
However conditional powerless is not absolute. That through some means powerlessness that is conditional can be subject to change.
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
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Originally Posted by Sapling
Maybe that's why it works for me. I'm absolutely powerless over alcohol. And I'm also a permanent alcoholic.
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