Drinking is not an option?
Drinking is not an option?
I can tell you that as long as you leave the option of drinking open, or the choice available, you will have debates and fights. I use AVRT, and it is somewhat of a paradox, but I no longer choose not to drink. When I made a plan for permanent, unconditional, irrevocable abstinence, I effectively decided never to choose again, and in doing so, the power of choice was removed.
I have not participated in AA and will withhold my mostly uninformed opinion.
RR is a very empowering method that, once you to make the choice to quit drinking, gives you the tools to deal with the "great persuader" (you) and then allows you to move on with the rest of your life.
No relapses. It's simply not possible. Note I said simple, not easy.
This forum was integral to my sobriety. While I was using RR without knowing and had already made the choice to quit drinking, RR helped me to ferret out the little voice that was leaving the possibility of the future use of alcohol open.
My advice: read up on RR. Get the book. As TU points out it is relatively inexpensive...certainly less than a night drinking!
RR is a very empowering method that, once you to make the choice to quit drinking, gives you the tools to deal with the "great persuader" (you) and then allows you to move on with the rest of your life.
No relapses. It's simply not possible. Note I said simple, not easy.
This forum was integral to my sobriety. While I was using RR without knowing and had already made the choice to quit drinking, RR helped me to ferret out the little voice that was leaving the possibility of the future use of alcohol open.
My advice: read up on RR. Get the book. As TU points out it is relatively inexpensive...certainly less than a night drinking!
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
I am an active AA member, but I wholeheartedly agree with making your mind up 100% to not drink anymore and not consider it as a choice.. And if that voice speaks to you and tells you to take a drink. DONT BELIEVE IT. Best wishes on a long healthy sober life for all of you.
I've had more exposure to AA, and none with AVRTso I can't really say I like one better than the other, i just like telling myself, "drinking is not an option" didn't mean to promote AVRT. Whatever works for ya, that's all that matters. i hope i didn't start a war, sincerily
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: « USA » Recovered with AVRT (Rational Recovery) ___________
Posts: 3,680
I wouldn't go that far, but I get your meaning. As I said, it is somewhat of a paradox, and it often trips up AVRT newbies. I was on the RR forums once, and someone posted about 'choosing not to drink today', and Jack Trimpey replied along the lines of "I hope you change your thinking on that. If you have indeed decided to never drink again, and to never change your mind, then you no longer have a choice." I had to ponder that one... wheels started turning... duh! It made quite a difference in how much of a struggle it was, though.
Not trying to start an argument so if I have that wrong in someones opinion please don't be offended.
I wouldn't go that far, but I get your meaning. As I said, it is somewhat of a paradox, and it often trips up AVRT newbies. I was on the RR forums once, and someone posted about 'choosing not to drink today', and Jack Trimpey replied along the lines of "I hope you change your thinking on that. If you have indeed decided to never drink again, and to never change your mind, then you no longer have a choice." I had to ponder that one... wheels started turning... duh! It made quite a difference in how much of a struggle it was, though.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
They don't say that in AA...They say rarely...I've never seen anyone fail that thoroughly followed it. I just think if people are new to recovery and are dealing with a life threatening disease....You have to be kind of careful about what a program offers. I'm all for giving people hope....But saying relapse never happens is a little much.
For the record I wasn't trying to stomp on AA I know nothing about it so try to make no comments for or against. The last one I made may have been leaning the wrong way. But anyhow I was just trying to explain the RR point of view or definition of "relapse" as I see it, and can understand your concern with newcomers not having any knowledge of RR and its theroy could be mislead (perhaps not the right word) by that statment. It makes sense when viewed as TU like to say "through the lense of AVRT" but not everyone has those particular pair of spectacles on.
But I am in danger of hijacking the thread so will now be putting myself in a time out .
For me, I know little of AA but am beginning to learn after years of unfounded prejudice.
My stumbling block was admitting that I was powerless over alcohol. I didn't like that, and therefore didn't go to AA and carried on emanating power over my drinking by getting drunk every night
AVRT gave me a way in because I didn't have to say I was an alcoholic. It is empowering and very good for stubborn people like me.
However it does seem to exist as an antidote to AA and I think for a lot of people who have never been to AA it could exist in it's own right.
But there is no reason one fellow in AA shouldn't encourage another in AVRT and vice versa. The end result is far more important than the method and if one bicycle breaks down, you can always get on the other one.
I am pretty sure this is the one you are looking for Hypo some really good reading that.
This is a very helpful thread for me, at the end of the day I have made a healthy choice to take responsibilty for my recovery. Learning how not to drink is a journey, I dont want to ever think I have the sober life in my back pocket. If someone in RR, AVRT, Celebrate Recovery, the Pope, the Dali Lama, a homeless guy on the street, has a helpful message on the sober life for this AA guy, I will take it. The Big Book talks about the idea, that somehow someday we will be able to enjoy and control our drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker....and later it says, this idea has to be smashed (or we will wind up smashed lol). I agree with RR or AVRT on this one, they are saying the same thing in a different way. Drinking has ceased to be an option for me, today, tomorrow forever. Thanks everyone for feedback on this thread it is a good one.
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,685
I find its much better to believe I have a choice to drink or not. With the option to not drink, I can act accordingly with not drinking.
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