serious

well... as some might know, i am going through relapse (aka binge) ... trying to get out of it after 10+ months of being sober.

i'm glad i started posting here again yesterday, because i would not make through the day without SR support, not that i made it sober... but at least i didn't finish my typical bottle of 750/night.
anyways...
i was on my lunch break trying to get some sun and fresh air, as i was just walking down the street, and probably saw the most beautiful girl looking quite sad and having a glass of wine.
now, first of all, i am very shy to begin with... but i was feeling so crappy and delirious from not sleeping that i simply said "hi, rough day?" ...

to make the long story short we had a great conversation, i clearly "had" to buy more wine (at least not a bottle, like i used to). turns out she lost a friend (just like i did) and ... without "labeling" things i said that i am suffering from a drinking problem. never, ever, i mean ever would i say that to a stranger... i feel shy just posting about it here.

so the "crazy" part was that she gave me her phone number ... and she said "can you help me? i don't want to keep going like this". i cannot help myself at the moment, i would love to save her from making the mistakes i've done... but how? i'm again looking for a decent way out myself (no ER, like last time).

what can i do? i really want to help this person (whether it's a girl, boy, grandma, it doesn't matter)... i see suffering and hate seeing it, 'cause i've gone through enough myself.

Anna

It's understandable you want to help this young woman, but right now you need to focus on yourself and your recovery.

You could mention to her that AA is availble as well as other resources, but I don't think it would be a good idea to get involved with her beyond that.

You can help yourself and you do have a choice. Don't buy any alcohol today, no matter what. Drinking is not an option. You can do this.

serious

thanks, Anna. you are so right... how can i help anyone when i cannot help myself.
i did mention about SR and certain other things like Allan Carr book, i guess i didn't want or feel by going "overboard" with all this healthy advice or pretending to be an angel.

you know, maybe she listened to me... and will do something right. i don't know. to me it was really interesting, i guess, about how small this world is, and how simple it is to look for the solution in a very wrong place...

LoftyIdeals

Serious...I believe that angels come in all shapes and sizes.

Sapling

Why don't you two go to a meeting together?...Maybe something will click.

bryangt

Sounds like she was 'on your path' for a reason and maybe you did help her just by what you told her. BUT...much like being honest with yourself before being able to be honest with others, YOU must help yourself before helping others. Not that you can't assist or give advice or suggestions. But your program of recovery needs a foundation & solid footing before you can reach out to others & direct. Just my 2 cents...good luck...

serious

LoftyIdeals, it so interesting that you posted that... somewhat unique response.

i am not religious, in a sense that i do not to church, or temple or what have ya, yet i feel that there is definitely a higher being out there.

everything happens for a reason, karma is true (i have proof ). and maybe, just maybe something positive will come out of this whole situation. that's honestly what i'm just hoping for, at least for this moment.

serious

thank you. i might have mentioned in another post that i tried AA before... and i'm not quite sure if that was my thing. i also work 10-12 hours, so it's pretty hard to find a place given my in-between-drinking schedule (as of last few days).
it might sound crazy, but it's really not about a beautiful girl that i just met, i really want to help this person (and myself). and perhaps you are right about support and being there for one another... just as human beings, not really sure how i could i call and say... "hey, want to go to AA tonight?" ...

Sapling

How about saying.."I'm trying to help myself right now...And I'm going to try an AA meeting...Would you like to join me?"

Db1105

I found that I had to fix me, before I could have something to help fix others. That I had to have something to give, before I could give it to others. I'm also a big believer in Karma, and "things" happen for a reason. The whole 12 step program clicked over one drunk helping another.