Hello from a Newbie!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 2,308
Hello from a Newbie!
Hey y'all, I am new to SR and want to introduce myself. I am on day 3 after a relapse this week, but not entirely new to sobriety. I've quit drinking several times before, my longest stint being 6 years in my 20s - early 30s. However, since 2009 I have had many slips - too many to count. I seem to be able to go weeks and even months without drinking a drop, but then have a night where I really go wild and wake up with the worst hangover, promising to never do it again. I've been through outpatient treatment, I've been to AA meetings, I've also been to Women For Sobriety meetings. I am so sick and tired of being sick and tired! I've recently been through a divorce, and I know my slippery slope was related to the pain and suffering I've endured through the difficult times in my marriage and the subsequent split. However, I should have been on the up and up, since the worst of it is over, but I apparently need more than just myself to pull out of this self-destruction. It truly is self-destructive drinking - once I start, my warped brain says, I better get all my drinking in now because this is my last drunk ever!!! So, my last drink was 3 nights ago, and I am concentrating on one day at a time. I think one of my biggest problems is not wanting to be known as an alcoholic or problem drinker (so much for those that have encountered me while intoxicated)- how I wish I could have one beer so badly! However, as you all know so well, one is NEVER enough.....I need to fully accept that I can NOT drink. Thanks for all your support.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,560
Hi kittycat - great to have you with us. It is hard to admit we can never have another drink - that no amount of willpower will save us from this disease. Once we accept it, though - things become much easier. I was relieved to be free of the constant battle. No more hiding it, no more letting it rule my life.
You can do it - we're here to help. Keep reading & posting.
You can do it - we're here to help. Keep reading & posting.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Ireland
Posts: 1,641
Welcome Kittycat,
I just want to say HI!
and
This stood out to me, "I've been to AA meetings, I've also been to Women For Sobriety meetings."
The thing is, for most alcoholics, it is a lifelong battle/process.
If you get quit, you have to maintain the gift of sobriety.
Commit to your lifelong recovery.
A diabetic doesn't stop taking insulin once the glucose stabilizes.
Same with alcoholism.
And as with diabetes, life is just healthier and happier and calmer when maintained on proper "medication". Look at the different recovery programs and pick one for life.
Best of luck.
I just want to say HI!
and
This stood out to me, "I've been to AA meetings, I've also been to Women For Sobriety meetings."
The thing is, for most alcoholics, it is a lifelong battle/process.
If you get quit, you have to maintain the gift of sobriety.
Commit to your lifelong recovery.
A diabetic doesn't stop taking insulin once the glucose stabilizes.
Same with alcoholism.
And as with diabetes, life is just healthier and happier and calmer when maintained on proper "medication". Look at the different recovery programs and pick one for life.
Best of luck.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((KittyCat))) - Welcome to SR!! I didn't want to be thought of as an addict, either. That was when I was abusing opiates, I went on, later, to become totally addicted to crack. I couldn't deny the addiction to that.
SR has been a huge part of my recovery. I found that I can learn something from people who have all kinds of addictions..alcohol, meth, speed, crack, you name it, I can relate...even things I've never done, which, unfortunately, are rare.
We're like a big family here, we come here in all stages of addiction..not sure we're addicted, not wanting to be called an addict/alcoholic, and those of us who have finally had to admit..yeah, I'm an A (addict/alcoholic).
When I first came here (I lurked for over 2 years) I read and read, then read some more. It sunk in...the people here GET me, at whatever point I've been in recovery? There's someone here who's at the same place, or someone who remembers being where I was at the time.
Sooo, welcome to the family
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
SR has been a huge part of my recovery. I found that I can learn something from people who have all kinds of addictions..alcohol, meth, speed, crack, you name it, I can relate...even things I've never done, which, unfortunately, are rare.
We're like a big family here, we come here in all stages of addiction..not sure we're addicted, not wanting to be called an addict/alcoholic, and those of us who have finally had to admit..yeah, I'm an A (addict/alcoholic).
When I first came here (I lurked for over 2 years) I read and read, then read some more. It sunk in...the people here GET me, at whatever point I've been in recovery? There's someone here who's at the same place, or someone who remembers being where I was at the time.
Sooo, welcome to the family
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 2,308
Hi Impurrfect, from one cat lover to another! I so appreciate your friendly welcome (and all those that have posted). I can't tell you how glad I am that I found this site. After this week where I had two nights of crazy drinking, both times waking the next morning in a pile of shame and disgust, all of the posts have comforted me. I just don't have anywhere else I need to be right now, and that feels good. I can relate to the posts of relapse, and I so want all the happiness and contentedness I read in the sober posts. Wahoo! Happy Saturday evening!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((kittycat))) as someone who absolutely did NOT want to be an A (addict/alcholic..addict in my case), when I came here, I realized I wasn't alone. No one wants to be an A, but knowing we're not alone? Wow, that is pretty darned awesome. It's like a club that no one wants to be a part of, but it also makes us realize we're not alone.
For me? That was a big deal. I thought I was the worst person on the face of this earth, until I came here. I've been through a lot in my 5 years of recovery, some pretty tough stuff, but my first thought was always "just let me get to SR, and I'll be okay". I have NEVER been let down...not through the two robberies at work (the 2nd one I was pistol-whipped and later found out the kid who hit me murdered 4 people and a dog within 24 hours), not when loved ones are sick or have died, etc. There has been NOTHING that has happened in my life the last 5 years, that I wasn't relieved that I have a recovery family to come to.
I can come here and whine, vent, be grateful. It doesn't matter what I'm going through, there is always someone here for me, and it's the same for you. The really cool thing is that there are people here from all over the world and different time zones. I've come here in the middle of MY night, frantic, wanting to be numb, yet someone was here to talk me down.
SR isn't always enough for everyone..f2f support is important, but I have that in family, and I've been blessed to meet a few people from here. My dad teases me that "there is nowhere on this earth that you don't know someone from that recovery thing you're on"
When we're truly at the point where we realize that what we're doing isn't working, there are a ton of people to support us.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
For me? That was a big deal. I thought I was the worst person on the face of this earth, until I came here. I've been through a lot in my 5 years of recovery, some pretty tough stuff, but my first thought was always "just let me get to SR, and I'll be okay". I have NEVER been let down...not through the two robberies at work (the 2nd one I was pistol-whipped and later found out the kid who hit me murdered 4 people and a dog within 24 hours), not when loved ones are sick or have died, etc. There has been NOTHING that has happened in my life the last 5 years, that I wasn't relieved that I have a recovery family to come to.
I can come here and whine, vent, be grateful. It doesn't matter what I'm going through, there is always someone here for me, and it's the same for you. The really cool thing is that there are people here from all over the world and different time zones. I've come here in the middle of MY night, frantic, wanting to be numb, yet someone was here to talk me down.
SR isn't always enough for everyone..f2f support is important, but I have that in family, and I've been blessed to meet a few people from here. My dad teases me that "there is nowhere on this earth that you don't know someone from that recovery thing you're on"
When we're truly at the point where we realize that what we're doing isn't working, there are a ton of people to support us.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
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