RyanRyan

Scared and nervous waiting to go in...ugh

Nextchapter

Awesome step. Don't be nervous, just be honest

Sapling

That's right...It won't do either of you any good if you hold things back....It's a good start...

Anna

You're doing the right thing.

Let us know how it went.

Dee74

Hope it went well

D

donce

yeah, me to sober from beer

RyanRyan

I feel like a damn fool now. I should have never gone. After spilling my guts to this woman about some really personal #### she finishes up the session by telling me she cannot help me with my drinking problem and that I need to join AA. *She said she was not a recovery program. This after I told her how much I drink a week. Her reaction to that made me worried. She couldn't believe it. She said really? 12 bottles of wine a week? *And beer? (I think she thought i meant weekend now I'm even more paranoid)...you need help, she says...or you wont see your 40th birthday. Really lady, why do you think I'm here. I'm just waiting for CPS to come and get my kids that's how worried I am.

Yes moron I do need help, I dont know where to go, thats why I called you!

She agreed to see me further only if I join AA go to 3 meetings a week and get a sponsor and tell all my friends and family...Well if I did that I wouldn't need her....I am so pissed right now

What's even the point.

Psychologist....whatever.

Jabbadabutt

Perhaps it is like you are asking a bone doctor about your heart. If she can not help I suggest you find an alcohol and drug counselor. Yellow pages, google it, whatever but just do it fast. That is what they do and do that only. That is what I did and so far so good. It sounds like you are ready. Step 1 - stop drinking. Step 2 - get help. Step 3 - do whatever it takes to keep it going.

camedown

First I'd like to commend you on taking an active part in your recovery by seeing a therapist and for committing yourself to a sober lifestyle. I hate to say this, but she is right, a therapist isn't a recovery program, and she probably wasn't far off on the 40 years old thing either. I made it to 41, but wouldn't have hit 42 if I didn't quit. For me, the biggest part of recovery was doing what others advised me to do. I could not quit on my own, I needed help. I sought the help of a recovery program through Kaiser, and they told me to go to AA. I went to AA and they told me to get a sponsor and work the steps, so I did. I was willing to do anything so as not to be in that ICU clinging to life again. I am now closing in on one year after 25 years of heavy drinking and drugging. Point is, I did what others told me, others who knew more about sobriety than I did. Don't look at this as a negative experience, but as a guideline to your next step towards long term sobriety. Best of luck!!!

jimmydean

First off, just making the effort to talk to someone about your problems is to be commended. I had a similar situation when i met with a therapist. I told him my story and i could tell that he couldn't help me within 30 min of talking.

Don't feel foolish, just keep searching, stay focused and "begin with the end in mind" each day.

workingknee

Don't worry, no one is going to take your children away from you and you needn't run out and tell everyone you know that you have problems...

I would recommend never seeing her again. She sounds frustrating and judgmental - I'm sure there are drug and alcohol consellors in your area that will be uch cooler. First though, keep positive about your recovery, its you that going to be doing the awesome sober stuff, its you thats going to be so healthy, its you who is going to be the best parent in town and if not, the best parent for your children.

Follow the path of greatest support, you will find it, and SR is a great place - no one is going to be judgmental here.

Let us know how it goes, and congratulations on your sobriety: I believe you drank that much, and I believe you can live a happy and sober life!!!!!

Sapling

I don't know...Sounds like she gave you some pretty good advice....I guess you could keep looking for the perfect therapist...Or take a proven program that's free...I had to figure out that it works on my own....And I'm glad I did.

RyanRyan

I guess I'm just upset because I told this Therapist exactly what I needed help with. She should have been honest from the start and told me that she doesn't work with alcohol abuse, I didn't just walk in unannounced. I've looked up AA but really don't think it's for me. I've spent much of my life trying to put God in my life and I have just decided religion and God aren't for me. Please correct me if I'm wrong about AA being very God based? I do not wish to offend anyone it's just not my thing. I do like the suggestion of an alcohol counselor so thank you for that. I really don't want to make this a big deal for my family and kids. I dont want everyone to know, I just want to beat it and move on. I will keep looking for the right source for help. I will not feel foolish from this one bad experience. This forum helps immensely thank you all for your help!

Tonight instead of drinking I'm taking a walk with my wife and dogs

Zencat

G*d and religion is not for me either. As far as I know AA is faith based, a person can have a Higher Power or G*d that they pray to so as to lift them out of alcoholism. Its up to you what that HP is. Nothing to do with being religious tho.

I'm an atheist that goes to AA. My HP has nothing to do with G*d or religion or anything magical for that matter. My HP is the Helping People in AA. I may not have faith but I have experience and my experience with helping others has always been positive.

Jilllian

i think she did you a favor.
most therapists aren't drug and alcohol counselors and don't have the specified training, unless they specifically chose to take it separately.
she should have told you this upfront, or whoever did your intake appointment should have.
that first appointment you have where they ask about your whole life history pretty much, and then ask you why you're there, is when they should have referred you elsewhere.
drug and alcohol counselors have less training but focus *just* on that aspect.
at least you didn't waste a whole lot of time there...
glad you're getting help.
hope you stick with it.
best of luck!

IndaMiricale

AA is not religion its a spritual way of life. I hope you find something , so many and I mean so many people say excatly what you did. I read some on it ect. All I know is your way of thinking is not working try something that does.

sugarbear1

AA is about to celebrate 77 years of one alcoholic helping another alcoholic to achieve sobriety in daily living. 100 years before AA, The Washingtonians had achieved the same thing--one alcoholic helping another alcoholic. Today, we also have AVRT, SMART, SOS, Women for Recovery, Sober Recovery Website and others....it's still one alcoholic helping another.

We seem to be able to help each other like no one else can. Stick around SR.

Maybe do a search for that alcoholism therapist, they are listed online, but I'd suggest writing a list of question for you to ask them before meeting with them in person or for meeting them the first time--like an interview.

Stay strong and stay sober,

SOBERINNEPA

It's too bad you didn't find what you were looking for but she did give you some solid advice.

The first person I was honest with, about my drinking, was the intake nurse at rehab. Then I was honest with my counselor and then the members of my group. When I got out, I was honest with my wife, family and friends. For the first time in my life, 52 years, I felt like I had a support system because, for the first time in my life, all my cards were on the table.

In a way, you could be thankful. If she's doesn't have a background in addiction counseling, you wouldn't want to have her trying to fake her way through it.

There's as wide a spectrum of belief in AA as there is outside of it. Some people have a very God-centered program of recovery and some are atheists. There's also a wide variety of meetings. I've found a couple that I really enjoy and make sure I hit them weekly.

At the very least, I wouldn't reject a program out of hand until I'd investigated it. Good luck in your search.

LDT

R&R.... I applaud you for trying to find what works for you. Only you can know what fits. The different recovery programs suggested here are obviously working for others trying to get and remain sober. And I think that's fantastic! But there is little discussed here about getting sober on one's own with the help of a qualified addicitions therapist. And that's exactly how I got sober over 14 months ago. Some may refer to that as the " white knuckle" approach ( whatever )...Was it free? No. Was it priceless? Yes. It was also perfect for ME. I don't blame you for being upset after your first appointment. Seems you had done your homework
beforehand. But don't let that discourage you. Keep searching. Keep reading. Keep
listening. Sugarbear is right....in the end it's just one alcoholic helping another....no matter what course you take.

2granddaughters

That's a typical decision for an alcoholic to make as our lives spiral out of control. Our decisions get more and more illogical and self-defeating.
AA is "God, as we understand him" based, and all AA members are different. Some are GOD (Good Orderly Direction) and some are GOD (Group Of Drunks) etc. Whatever works for you and God will continue to change as you go along in AA.

You are not offending me, my point is it likely is "Just your thing" once you give it a try. It's worked for me for a while now.

Wishing you the best.

Bob R