Stay away from triggers...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: London
Posts: 299
Stay away from triggers...
Hello,
Another newbie question from me....
My younger brother has asked me to spend easter with him and my other brother. Younger brother is an alcoholic, other brother binges.
I love them both, haven't seen them for months so would be great to see them and I'm feeling lonely. But I'm 11 days sober. Is the whole points of recovery admitting you cannot be around situations like this in the early days? I'm thinking negatively as if I don't see them I'll be alone and at meetings, but I'm assuming that unless I get on and do this properly I'll slip back again and again.
Thanks.
Another newbie question from me....
My younger brother has asked me to spend easter with him and my other brother. Younger brother is an alcoholic, other brother binges.
I love them both, haven't seen them for months so would be great to see them and I'm feeling lonely. But I'm 11 days sober. Is the whole points of recovery admitting you cannot be around situations like this in the early days? I'm thinking negatively as if I don't see them I'll be alone and at meetings, but I'm assuming that unless I get on and do this properly I'll slip back again and again.
Thanks.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: London
Posts: 299
yes. you're right. I need to come to terms with this (I don't mean that negatively as I know rationally stopping drinking will be the best thing for me ever).
Meetings it will be. Do other people struggle with this thinking initially? I'm hoping so and I'm not doomed for failure.
Meetings it will be. Do other people struggle with this thinking initially? I'm hoping so and I'm not doomed for failure.
So it goes
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Manchester UK
Posts: 1,620
Have you told them you are quitting because you are in AA. There is the chance that they will support you. I would see if that is an option, otherwise it is probably safer to stay away for now
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: London
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Originally Posted by BillyPilgrim 
Have you told them you are quitting because you are in AA. There is the chance that they will support you. I would see if that is an option, otherwise it is probably safer to stay away for now
I will see them all at a later date, when much, much longer in my sobriety
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
My younger brother won't go to AA...He's too smart....He'll get there one day...It may cost him his family...His house....His job and everthing else....I've never seen someone to dumb to get this program....But I've seen people to smart to get it.
As far as struggling with thinking like that...I kept myself too busy listening to my sponsor and working the steps right off the bat to think about much else....It worked.
As far as struggling with thinking like that...I kept myself too busy listening to my sponsor and working the steps right off the bat to think about much else....It worked.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: London
Posts: 299
Lol at the families link Billypilgrim (it won't let me quote as I'm too new).. he's actually the poet who was based in the town I was born in. I walked past his statue yesterday in the train station. And that poem is very true.. thank you for the reminder.. none of us mean to do it, it just happens.
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,422
Originally Posted by regeneration
Meetings it will be. Do other people struggle with this thinking initially? I'm hoping so and I'm not doomed for failure.
Rooting for you,
Still xxx
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,308
Hi Regeneration,
You know what you need to do and yes it is too early in sobriety. Family is my biggest trigger.
The best thing you can do is achive a successful and happy sobriety. That would be the best example you can show your brothers, show that it can be done.
Good on you.
All the best
CaiHong
You know what you need to do and yes it is too early in sobriety. Family is my biggest trigger.
The best thing you can do is achive a successful and happy sobriety. That would be the best example you can show your brothers, show that it can be done.
Good on you.
All the best
CaiHong
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: los angeles, CA
Posts: 6
Hello Regeneration! I too have a similar situation for attending Easter with my drinking family. I have only been sober for 2 days now. I plan to attend for I love my family,but it will require restraint not to drink.. If they ask me why I am not drinking, I'll tell them I have had enough. I will not preach to them. It will be a delicate situation.
I say this for one of my brothers at the age of 38 died of alcoholism (fatty liver). I wish I spent more time with him...even if he was drinking...
I say this for one of my brothers at the age of 38 died of alcoholism (fatty liver). I wish I spent more time with him...even if he was drinking...
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,422
Originally Posted by losangelesguy
Hello Regeneration! I too have a similar situation for attending Easter with my drinking family. I have only been sober for 2 days now. I plan to attend for I love my family,but it will require restraint not to drink.. If they ask me why I am not drinking, I'll tell them I have had enough. I will not preach to them. It will be a delicate situation.
I say this for one of my brothers at the age of 38 died of alcoholism (fatty liver). I wish I spent more time with him...even if he was drinking...
I say this for one of my brothers at the age of 38 died of alcoholism (fatty liver). I wish I spent more time with him...even if he was drinking...
Wow good luck dude. And welcome to SR
brilliant to have you on board! xxx
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 1,126
I understand about triggers (mine is breathing), but I sure wouldn't want to be around an active alcoholic at 11 days. Could you just hunker in for the holiday weekend and work on you? Read, movies, walks...anything but but place yourself in a tempting situation?
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Ontario
Posts: 806
Originally Posted by regeneration
Hello,
Another newbie question from me....
My younger brother has asked me to spend easter with him and my other brother. Younger brother is an alcoholic, other brother binges.
I love them both, haven't seen them for months so would be great to see them and I'm feeling lonely. But I'm 11 days sober. Is the whole points of recovery admitting you cannot be around situations like this in the early days? I'm thinking negatively as if I don't see them I'll be alone and at meetings, but I'm assuming that unless I get on and do this properly I'll slip back again and again.
Thanks.
Another newbie question from me....
My younger brother has asked me to spend easter with him and my other brother. Younger brother is an alcoholic, other brother binges.
I love them both, haven't seen them for months so would be great to see them and I'm feeling lonely. But I'm 11 days sober. Is the whole points of recovery admitting you cannot be around situations like this in the early days? I'm thinking negatively as if I don't see them I'll be alone and at meetings, but I'm assuming that unless I get on and do this properly I'll slip back again and again.
Thanks.
Have you asked them not to drink around you?
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