Been searching for answers...can you help me?
 

Hi everyone,

I've posted before here only once. It was in January when I tried to stop taking the Xanax to begin with. I've gone through hell. I know a lot of people say that but by God, its true.

I've basically been trying to stop taking Xanax for three months now, and I haven't had any progress. In January I went to an outpatient program and tried to deal with my anxiety issues there and I think I was making some progress but the cost was too much for me to handle and I couldn't afford to keep going. I had stopped taking the drug completely for a week and a half when my insomnia and anxiety crept back up on me and I couldn't sleep again. I went to see a sleep doctor after going an entire week on 9 hours of sleep. He told me to take the Xanax for a week strait and then start to take it every two nights off, one night on. I couldn't follow through with that regime and basically now I've been taking it for the last 3 weeks strait.

This drug has a very strange effect on me that I haven't read about elsewhere, though. After I take it for a certain amount of time, it seems to damage my intestinal track somehow and I become so nauseated I can't eat and I lose a ton of weight. So I literally am killing myself by continuing to take it. I have to stop now, or its going to eat me away. I can't take ambien, or anything like that, either, I have extreme nausea and I throw up from it, so that's why I take Xanax, but it seems to produce similar results after prolonged use.

So, I dont know, I'm just so lost, scared and anxious out of my mind, exhausted, depressed..... I cant take it anymore. I can't take the lack of sleep, and the pills do more harm than good. They don't even get me to sleep anymore, only for a few hours and then I'm up again. It's infuriating. I have anxiety when I even think about sleep, so that makes trying to go to bed a nightmare in itself. I think I'm going to die from this drug. My sleep doctor doesn't know what to do for me. No one does. I feel hopeless, alone. What can I do? If I just stop taking the pills now, how long would my insomnia go on for? Can anyone recommend a good doctor in the Chicagoland area for help? I need help. Someone please help me. Please.

Hello violet:
I think you will find that NA would be a big help to you. Lots of folks at the meetings who know what you are going through and they've done it. Go to NA and tell them how you feel.
I thought I needed a psychiatrist when I first came to AA... turns out the doctors, lawyers and priests were already in AA and I found them at the table.
No need to try to do this alone.....

Wishing you the best.

Bob R

I am so sorry violet, what a terrible merry go round you are on.

I was having terrible anxiety over going to sleep the past year. Many of us abuse drugs and alcohol due to anxiety and sleep related issues. So we may not have the medical answer to your situation, but we surely DO understand the feelings of frustration and hopelessness.

I know it is likely to be a chicken/egg situation, but do you know which came first? the anxiety or the insomnia?

Your body isn't loving the Xanax, there are many many ways to address insomnia, so it may take some time, but there is definitely hope.

how thorough and intensive was your sleep dr's investigations into your sleep habits, etc?

I'm glad that you went to see a sleep dr for your problems. However, you don't know if his plan would work because you weren't able to stick with it. Why not go back to him again and tell him what happened?

Insomnia is very hard to deal with, and it's so tricky because as soon as you begin to worry about it, you're lost. I do best when I'm able to convince myself that it doesn't matter how much I sleep on a particular night. Have you considered napping in the day?

Sorry for your pain Violet.
I think these substances we take hoping to ease the anxiety and sleep issues make them worse over time.

My anxiety attacks about 15 yrs. ago during a very tumultuous time in life, and they prescribed Valium. Geez, I said to myself this is an addictive substance they prescribed-SOME SOLUTION! I might as well drink--at least if lifted my up while it calmed me down. Every time I went off alcohol the anxiety would become overwhelming, as would the sleeplessness. Sleeplessness leads to paranoia for me after 4 hrs. in two nights, plus all that tired, useless ruminating lying in bed for hours-ugh?
I hope you find peace