Dominica2

But I feel better now. I didn't make my meeting, even though I tried my hardest. I have been on SR a good bit of the time. I am starting to feel better and less aggitated. When I think about picking up a drink, I immidiately start recounting the horrible, selfish, stupid acts that controlled my life. complete and utter chaos. This is going to take a lot to mend. My mind has been all over the place. I think the reason I have been wanting to drink so badly is because of the headaches, which is result to the fact that I have absolutely no apetite and I am having to force myself to eat. Anxiety is getting better, it only peeks its head out when I start feeling guilty about the past, really. Anyway, another sober day for me. Day 19 here I come! Thanks for all of the support here at SR. Y'all help me stay sober.

Dom

silly

Your courage is amazing. Keep it up!

Hevyn

Great to hear this Dominica I know we keep repeating "it gets better" - but it really is true. In those first 2-3 months I was very emotional & fragile. I changed completely over time - grew stronger and more determined as I healed. You will too. Proud of you!

2granddaughters

Dom, don't drift too far away from the meetings. There is a lot of education, healing, understanding and forgiveness inside those walls.

All the best to you. You go, girl !!

Bob R

BillyPilgrim

The early days are hard Dom, however, you are doing great, if you cant get to AA dont beat yourself up, just do what it takes. Hanging round SR does it for me

InsertNameHere

Keep it up Dominica!

What do you mean that you "made excuses to be miserable"? I have to force myself to find ways in which I should be happy, there are already plenty of reasons I should be misserable I don't need to compound them. I don't know if that applies to you but I find it helps if I just try to take a little more joy in small things then I would normaly, i.e. if something makes me smile even a little I stop for a moment and focus on that letting myself focus on the positive feeling even if it is something silly. That is helping me during the times that I am freaking out and feeling like crap anyway. Glad to hear you are still sticking to it. From what people are saying including you I think I will check out an AA meeting when I get to the states, not for sobriety I got that handled now but for the social interaction and positive life influence that it seems to provide for us former drunks. I did promise Sapling that I would go to one anyway, maybe if I like it I could make it a habit. At least it would be a good way for someone like me to make new friends, that is something I find difficulty with.

Ghostlight

No use living in the past. If you can't make a meeting, you can't make a meeting. Don't be hard on yourself over it.

You do the same thing I do- when I think of drinking I think of the chaos and horrors it has wrought upon me. That's kept me sober for over two years, along with coming here, of course.

Today's a new day and we get to start again, another chance. What a blessing.

Be proud of your sobriety, and best to you.

Zebra1275

Dominica, keep adding to your string of sober days, one day at a time. Life gets easier the longer you keep it up.

IndaMiricale

This is so true. I am at day 91 much better but still very careful.

Fandy

congrats on your 19 days! I hope you are feeling good today and do something nice for yourself. I know you woke up happy that you didn't drink. you're not hungover, you can have a full happy day with your child and family.

Dominica2

Thanks everyone! I do feel great this morning! even got to seep in! I have lots of cleaning and yard work ahead of me today! Thank you all so much for the support! I hope everyone has a wonderful, SOBER day!

Love,
Dom