panic over my health-is this normal?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: uk
Posts: 24
panic over my health-is this normal?
I just want to say first of all I'm not seeking medical advice, I know this is forbidden! I just want to know if other people have had similar experience as I'm doing this on my own and so have nobody in my life to ask.
So I quite drinking a month ago, and gave up smoking a week ago. And I've become increasingly aware of my health and what I've done to my body and it scares me!
I went to my doc, had all tests done etc and all came back fine! And I am so relieved. However I'm back panicking again! Any little twinge in my chest I think I'm having a heart attack because I smoked so many years, if I get cramp in my stomach I'm convinced my liver is packing in. Sounds so dramatical I know, especially as I've had the all clear. I have never been like this before...I never gave a monkeys about my health before until now its hitting me all at once!
I just want to know if this is normal and have others experienced this when they was new to sobriety? I feel like I'm going slightly crazy.
So I quite drinking a month ago, and gave up smoking a week ago. And I've become increasingly aware of my health and what I've done to my body and it scares me!
I went to my doc, had all tests done etc and all came back fine! And I am so relieved. However I'm back panicking again! Any little twinge in my chest I think I'm having a heart attack because I smoked so many years, if I get cramp in my stomach I'm convinced my liver is packing in. Sounds so dramatical I know, especially as I've had the all clear. I have never been like this before...I never gave a monkeys about my health before until now its hitting me all at once!
I just want to know if this is normal and have others experienced this when they was new to sobriety? I feel like I'm going slightly crazy.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: uk
Posts: 24
I just want to add, I think I am feeling guilt for what I have put my body through health wise. When so many people are sick and they never smoked, drink, drugs etc and then there's me that put myself so at risk all these years and was asking for it basically. Argh I don't know if this makes senseso hard to put in words. Just somebody tell me that its normal and it will go away x
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Join Date: Dec 2011
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Hey melissa86...That happened with me too....Checked out OK with the Doc....But as I started clearing my head up it was like I could feel any possible ailment my body had...Kind of like normal stuff I was to drunk to feel before....You cut your mind off from something you've been supplying it with for a long time...It's going to play with you...My anxiety level was high which only makes it worse....That's why I had to free up some of that crap in my head working the steps of AA. I'd guess you're fine...I was....And I didn't have to keep going back to my Doc for second...third and fourth opinions.....Which I thought about doing.
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 3,452
Fear of what we did to ourselves.
Fear of death.
Fear of our truth.
Someone taught me to get a pen and paper and write down what I was afraid of.
I have fear over my health.
I have fear it's too late.
I have fear I am going to die.
I have fear my liver is bad.
etc.
At the end of the list...write...
Please God, remove my fears. I pray for knowledge of your will for us and the power to carry that out. Amen.
Ask God to remove the fear. It is fear.
Panic is fear.
~
From the book Alcoholics Anonymous, How It Works
"We never apologize for God. Instead we let Him demonstrate, through us, what He can do. We ask Him to remove our fear and direct our attention to what He would have us be. At once, we commence to outgrow fear."
Into Action
"Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them."
Fear of death.
Fear of our truth.
Someone taught me to get a pen and paper and write down what I was afraid of.
I have fear over my health.
I have fear it's too late.
I have fear I am going to die.
I have fear my liver is bad.
etc.
At the end of the list...write...
Please God, remove my fears. I pray for knowledge of your will for us and the power to carry that out. Amen.
Ask God to remove the fear. It is fear.
Panic is fear.
~
From the book Alcoholics Anonymous, How It Works
"We never apologize for God. Instead we let Him demonstrate, through us, what He can do. We ask Him to remove our fear and direct our attention to what He would have us be. At once, we commence to outgrow fear."
Into Action
"Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them."
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Wales UK
Posts: 859
The important thing is it will all get better not worse.
Oh and the chest thing after giving up smoking is normal. Check re growing villi after stoping smoking,
Anxiety is a problem that will also get better.
Dee again has nailed it in so few words.
Just be pleased , you should be .
John.
Oh and the chest thing after giving up smoking is normal. Check re growing villi after stoping smoking,
Anxiety is a problem that will also get better.
Dee again has nailed it in so few words.
Just be pleased , you should be .
John.
Awaiting Email Confirmation
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Iowa
Posts: 25
Hi Melissa,
Your physical health problems will get better. I've been sober for 5 days now (woot woot!) and although the alcohol has long been eliminated from my system, I'm still excreting the associated toxins from out of my body. For example, I have about as many zits now as a puberty stricken teenager all of a sudden which, according to my wife who is a Registered Nurse, is due to the remaining toxins still leaving my body. I'm a Civil Engineer so I'm going to use an engineering metaphor. Think of your abusing days as a magnitude 9 earthquake shaking a building. The first step in the repair is to the stabilize the foundation. Without a stable foundation, there's no way the structure can be expected to hold up. You've already done that, so now you need to focus on the structural elements. Maybe there's drywall that was cracked and needs to be replaced or maybe the structure needs to be entirely retrofitted to prevent it from having to be condemned. It's a long, arduous process, but it can be done.
Trust your physician and be strong. I'm not sure if other people here would agree with me or not, but it might be a good idea to ask your physician about anti-anxiety medication if you're feeling overwhelmed with anxiety. I myself am taking Buspar (15mg) two times a day and, while detoxing at the hospital and since then, have been taking Librium (25mg) basically every time I start to freak out. You could also try taking St. John's Wort which would be a more natural and over the counter way to control anxiety.
Anyway, if your physician says that you are well then trust him/her. Be strong and God bless.
-Peter
Your physical health problems will get better. I've been sober for 5 days now (woot woot!) and although the alcohol has long been eliminated from my system, I'm still excreting the associated toxins from out of my body. For example, I have about as many zits now as a puberty stricken teenager all of a sudden which, according to my wife who is a Registered Nurse, is due to the remaining toxins still leaving my body. I'm a Civil Engineer so I'm going to use an engineering metaphor. Think of your abusing days as a magnitude 9 earthquake shaking a building. The first step in the repair is to the stabilize the foundation. Without a stable foundation, there's no way the structure can be expected to hold up. You've already done that, so now you need to focus on the structural elements. Maybe there's drywall that was cracked and needs to be replaced or maybe the structure needs to be entirely retrofitted to prevent it from having to be condemned. It's a long, arduous process, but it can be done.
Trust your physician and be strong. I'm not sure if other people here would agree with me or not, but it might be a good idea to ask your physician about anti-anxiety medication if you're feeling overwhelmed with anxiety. I myself am taking Buspar (15mg) two times a day and, while detoxing at the hospital and since then, have been taking Librium (25mg) basically every time I start to freak out. You could also try taking St. John's Wort which would be a more natural and over the counter way to control anxiety.
Anyway, if your physician says that you are well then trust him/her. Be strong and God bless.
-Peter
Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Hicktown, PA
Posts: 1,479
HI Melissa - I understand exactly what you are saying. I had those same feelings- fear of bad health (in fact one of my friends here at SR and I can joke now about how when we first became sober, one or the other of us was "dying" every day!) I also felt shame about how I abused my body.
The way I coped, with the help of good health insurance and a very understanding doctor, was to make quarterly appointments with him for the first year of sobriety, after I had an initial physical and got the "all clear" on bloodwork, etc. Just being able to say "I am going to see the doctor soon, so I will bring this up then" helped me get passed the freaking out about every little ache and pain. Most of the time when I finally got to the doctor, I had no "real" complaints and he just monitored my anxiety and we talked about sobriety for a few minutes. That arrangement worked really well for me.
As for the shame of what you have done to your body when others are sick, etc., try to forgive yourself. You might also find some solace in doing something to better your health now- start an exercise program, better your diet - if there is room for improvement for those types of things in your life.
And last of all - know it goes away! Promise!
Jomey
The way I coped, with the help of good health insurance and a very understanding doctor, was to make quarterly appointments with him for the first year of sobriety, after I had an initial physical and got the "all clear" on bloodwork, etc. Just being able to say "I am going to see the doctor soon, so I will bring this up then" helped me get passed the freaking out about every little ache and pain. Most of the time when I finally got to the doctor, I had no "real" complaints and he just monitored my anxiety and we talked about sobriety for a few minutes. That arrangement worked really well for me.
As for the shame of what you have done to your body when others are sick, etc., try to forgive yourself. You might also find some solace in doing something to better your health now- start an exercise program, better your diet - if there is room for improvement for those types of things in your life.
And last of all - know it goes away! Promise!
Jomey
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 1,410
You have a clear mind now and thinking straight. Thinking of the past of you put yourself is scaring you. If you got test and thing fine then you should not worry. If you want to be clear for sure. You can always get a second test from a different doctor.
...not falling down them
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 1,200
I do the same thing. Two weeks ago I was sure I was going to die. I'm on day 14 of my quit now and am well hydrated and making nutrition a priority with my diet. Taking B12 and multivitamins. I feel sooo much better.
About a week ago my ears popped and I got that far away hearing sensation, like being on an airplane. Right away I thought "high blood pressure!!"; "brain tumor!!".
I did a little research and guess what. EAR WAX. So I used the little oil drops you get to soften up that deeper ear wax. All better now.
I do plan to get a physical soon, but I want to settle down from the alcohol first.
About a week ago my ears popped and I got that far away hearing sensation, like being on an airplane. Right away I thought "high blood pressure!!"; "brain tumor!!".
I did a little research and guess what. EAR WAX. So I used the little oil drops you get to soften up that deeper ear wax. All better now.
I do plan to get a physical soon, but I want to settle down from the alcohol first.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,460
I did the same thing, Melissa.
Finally, I accepted that we all only have today, and that I was feeling good today. Who knows what will happen with our health tomorrow, we sure don't. Letting go of my concerns with my health was a big step for me because I had to accept that I could only do my best today.
Finally, I accepted that we all only have today, and that I was feeling good today. Who knows what will happen with our health tomorrow, we sure don't. Letting go of my concerns with my health was a big step for me because I had to accept that I could only do my best today.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: In the South
Posts: 228
Hi Melissa: I think the above posters covered it all pretty well. I think what you're feeling is normal, considering that you are now able to "feel your feelings". I used to go so far as to worry about my AS's health problems, things caused from the abuse he had or would eventually do to his body (codie stuff!), never-even-mind that he could OD at any time. Finally like Anna said, I accepted all any of us have is today, this moment, that perfectly healthy people die in tragic auto accidents and so forth all the time and we have no control over any of it. So I've let it go, as best I can. 
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Midwest
Posts: 471
I had the same thing too...started when I was drinking and continued after I got sober. I went to the doctor, everything looked good, but the more time passed, I got nervous again. I have to admit, I still panic every time I feel a twinge in my chest-- first thought is still "heart attack!" but I'm able to calm myself down better now. I'm SLOWLY figuring out how to live in the moment and realize that worrying about what "might" happen is only going to make things worse. It's hard though...especially after the abuse we put our bodies through.
I felt a lot of guilt as well. I saw a show about a girl who had lung cancer and was most likely going to die. She was very young and never smoked or did anything "wrong." Man, that was awful. I just kept thinking that it was so unfair that she was going through that and I seem to be fine even though I have put my body through so much.
We can only do what we can do though... live our best lives now and take care of ourselves as much as possible. The rest isn't up to us. Best of luck!
I felt a lot of guilt as well. I saw a show about a girl who had lung cancer and was most likely going to die. She was very young and never smoked or did anything "wrong." Man, that was awful. I just kept thinking that it was so unfair that she was going through that and I seem to be fine even though I have put my body through so much.
We can only do what we can do though... live our best lives now and take care of ourselves as much as possible. The rest isn't up to us. Best of luck!
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