ACT10Npack

Last week, after leaving a meeting. I have this strong push to get drunk. I hate this feeling. I'm really weak. I try to hit the gym but I was in no mood to do this. I got out after 25 minutes and went to my friends place to get trash. After night I went to a motel and got drunk for a few nights until my friend pick me up to stay at their place for a few days. I told her that I would not drink but my mind was set to get drunk and could not sleep. I'm not home and feeling stupid depress. Still drinking but hope I will stop tonight. I hate this feeling, just before I start drinking, when I drink and when I'm trying to sober up. I just don't understand why I can't just say no to my craving after a month of sobriety.

Dee74

I kept caving too, over and over, until things got so bad I did something about it act10N.

Don't be dumb like I was and let this go on for years and years and years, like some screwed up groundhog day.

You need to accept the fact you need to make changes in your life.
Make them - & find some support - and use it.

I spent a lot of years being the worlds oldest teenager. It stopped being fun a long time before I stopped drinking because, despite myself, I was growing up.

You're at a crossroads now act10N - you can strike out in a new direction or keep doing the same stuff over and over, man.

You know which way you need to go.
You'll look back and think it the best decision you ever made - you really will.

D

eJoshua

Sorry you are dealing with that act10n. I don't have anything to add on to what Dee said -- those are wise words.

I hope you make the right moves.

ACT10Npack

Dee74, I hate when your right but don't know how to deal with these cravings. If I can learn them then I can stay sober. I want to be sober not a drunken man on the streets.

Jitterbugg

Hi Action,
I've done the 'hotel' vacation too. I used to tell my GF I was going to visit my parents for the weekend in a different city, then I would walk 5 mins down the street and check into a flea-bag hotel to drink and watch TV. I only left the room to buy more booze. Try not to isolate yourself like that. It just gives a free pass to us alkie's to drink away!

langkah

Well remember sitting alone on the edge of a hotel bed crying between gulps of vodka because I didn't want to drink.

What you want doesn't much matter when still stuck in your drinking pattern, where you are now. Oddly, when you're taking the actions in AA it doesn't matter what you think about them or how sincere you are, or if you feel good or bad.

Really is a waste of time to show up until you're willing to do those things.

johnny2times

sit with the cravings, they only last for 20mins at a time, and thats a scientific fact, so just remember...whenever you get a craving, 'sit with it', it will pass in 20mins or less, works for me

instant

It was those times of feeling compelled to go and get booze when I had decided not to drink several hours prior that told me this was getting serious.

I jumped out of the alcohol plane without a parachute

DayTrader

Action, perhaps the reason you can't say no to cravings is because you, like me, are a chronic alcoholic. The type of alkie who's alcoholism is "working" even when you're not drinking.....driving you back to drink again - even when you swear to yourself you won't and you reeeeally mean it.

I see you went to a meeting.....that's nice.....but you should try working the program. Meetings were NEVER designed to keep ppl sober. They help.......and they probably keep some "mild" alkies sober......but they're not gonna be enough for many of us. Look through the steps, yanno, the things we do to get/stay sober and enjoy life. There's no "go to meetings" step. Hence, meetings are important....but not vital.

The first 11 steps get you goin.....and in the 12 step, when you're "working it," you're out helping others. I assume you weren't doing that the night you got drunk.

It's your choice really......but lemme be clear: there's an immense difference between going to AA meetings and working the steps and applying them to all your daily affairs.