needadviceplz

Hello
I am struggling to answer this though I know the answer is probably yes I just am so confused on how to change or move on and how to get involved in aa and na see my problem stands that I don't think I "qualify" as an addict but its just getting worse I can't seem to stop. I have attended aa and na meetings and just feel like I don't belong there or i am not bad enough which is stupid and almost judgemental. I have never been stuck on one substance I drink when I can't find pot and I indulge in hard drugs whenever they come around and I will go on a couple day binge or just use until i run out of money. I put buying drugs and drinking ahead of all other responsibility but does bein a pot head and not being able to stop smoking really mean I am qualified to join na? I do hard drugs monthly but not daily I smoke weed daily but sometimes I don't have it. I just don't know where I stand in this anymore. Do I have a problem or not? Won't they just look at me and think that its silly for me to be there if I go to NA and say I have thrown my life away for pot and occassional hard drugs and if nothing else alcohol. I am so uncomfortable with myself sober and wait for drugs to come to me so to speak. Sure I look for them but I really don't obsess over bein messed up but I do like to smoke pot often I just seem to be in the cross roads of full blown and pull back I just need someone to confirm that I am an addict for some reason because I am not convinced even though the evidence points to yes how do you accept it? I hate who I am sober I have an addictive nature because if something makes me feel good no matter what it is I over indulge but its not just drugs and alcohol its everything I want help but feel out of place when I go to get it. I feel like I don't belong anywhere at all. In the drug crowd in the sober crowd or with other people I just don't know what to do anymore I just want change any advice or help will be appreciated.

justhadenough

I don't think it's a case of being qualified or not. The issue is if you have a problem with drink/drugs. only you can answer that question-no one else can confirm if you have a problem or not. If you feel you have a problem with drink/drugs and wants to stop then AA/NA is a source of help. good luck

johnny2times

firstly ..you DO qualify! drug of choice/amounts/frequency dont mean jack! i know plenty of people like you in aa/ca and na , try not to compare yourself to others and think 'ah well im not as bad as that guy' and rule yourself out...thats the drugs talkin to ya, the main thing what matters is the fact that you want a better quality of life right? then get with the program mate, oh and i know what you mean about feeling like you dont belong anywhere...i had that feeling since i left the forces in 2007 and came back to civilian life, i just didnt fit in or belong anywhere and i ended up in a very dark place from that kinda thinking, drinking myself to death, then i found aa...and for the first time in years i felt a great sense of belonging...felt like i was amongst my own kind...and i cant tellya how happy that made/makes me feel...i know im not alone anymore...try it n keep going for a while...you'll see what i mean.
best wishes

needadviceplz

Thanks, this is hard thing to do, I feel very uncomfortable in meetings but I know that I can't keep goin the way I am I have lost everything and it is getting worse every time I decide to use the guilt kicks in and the self destruction starts. I am just trying to justify not going I suppose. Your absolutely correct in its not a qualifying thing I get caught up on the thought that people won't like me or they will judge me but I know thats just me finding excuses. Thank you for the responses. I hope that someday I will feel ease walking in instead of panic. I need to get over my insecure nature and push through and just go to get help and stay clean I know no one will judge you there for wanting to live a better life just my head gets a little to loud sometimes.

Sapling

That's probably it...I see it a lot. I just have to flip that around...If someone said to me...Here is a way you can save your life...Remove the obsession for what is killing you...Allow you to live better and more happy than you've ever lived...But you're going to have to show up and follow some simple rules. How would I justify not doing that? I went to my homegroup meeting 7 days a week for my first six months...Didn't miss a day....People say "how can you do that?"...I say "the same way I never missed a day drinking for most of my life."....I got a sponsor out of the gate..Worked the steps...Changed my life...And I enjoy helping other sick and suffering alcoholics..."Why?"...You ask... Because that's one of the simple rules I have to follow.

awuh1

Fight the loneliness with people who were once like you. Many of us came into meetings and felt like we did not belong for one reason or another. When you're in meetings, try your best to identify with some aspect of what each and every person shares. I can usually relate to something nearly everyone says, but I have to put in some conscious effort. I can also find the differences between myself and anyone in a flash. That’s easy, but it doesn’t help me. I focus on the similarities because that’s where I find answers to my problems. Nobody is going to match up 100 per cent with anyone else in any given program. Work to find the similarities. If you have fewer similarities to others than most, the hard work you do now will be that much more valuable to that person, who one day in the future walks in, and looks much like you do now. And I will guarantee you one will.

johnny2times

mate, if you get into aa/ca/na (whichever floats ya boat) and start working a program, then trust me...all the panic/insecurities will leave you, and you will start to feel waaaay more confident and happy, you will begin to walk with your head held high everywhere you go, and (this might sound a bit corny lol but its true) it sorta feels like you develop this glow about ya...and nothing what life throws at you can bother ya anymore...then your life takes of from there, great frienships/relationships/work/career/ everything! i was the same as you in the beginning mate...and all this ive just described is what happened to me...it totally blew me away! putting down the drink n drugs was just the start for me...then all this happened.. an its brilliant! now do you see what i mean about a 'better quality of life' ?

keltie

In a word, yes. You are qualified. Go.