I've hit the wall.
 

I have been off prescription opiates for 57 days. This was my first treatment. I got out of treatment on day 54 and missed the residential and the people there right away. Everything was awesome while I was in treatment. I am back to my job and I am really struggling. I don't want to use but I feel like I am the EXACT same person as I was when I was using but now I am just clean. I go to a meeting every day and have a sponsor. I am just feeling like I am not making progress anymore. Have any of you people with years gone through stages like this? I know I need to do what is suggested to me and start working the steps and doing service work but I am working 8 hours a day and start out patient tomorrow night for 3 hours a night. I am ******* drained by the end of the day. I guess I am just looking for some comfort from others who have been through it.

-kevin

Hi Kevin

My drug of choice was alcohol, not opiates but I definitely needed to take some time to figure out not only who I was sober, but how to live sober.

It took a while, but then I'd drank and drugged for years.

If you have support use it - you're obviously busy but can we really have a higher priority than happiness and contentment? :dunno:

my advice is try and think of it as not something you have to do but something that will help make things easier and get you up and about on your sober feet sooner :)

I know you'll find a lot of support here too :)
You might also like to check out our substance abuse forum too:

Substance Abuse - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

D

If you had asked me "how's it going" at almost any point during my first 2 or 3 years, my honest answer would have been "ok, but I'm not as far along as I should be."

I came to see that that line of thought had more to be about me not being happy with the way my "turned over" life was going and a false belief that I'd be able to manage better. It was the same darn false ego that had been leading me astray during my drinking years.

If you feel like you need to get into the steps....and do more work in AA....then maybe you do. I dunno. Maybe you're already doing your best under the conditions you're in. (that was a tough one for me to swallow too....I always felt like I could be doing 20, 30, or 50% MORE.....no matter what I was doing).

When I got out of rehab and into the real world, yeah, my comfort zone changed. It was hard to make the change. I ended up not following a program of recovery for very long, I was playing a big game with my life. Fast forward 12 years, I now have 10+ months sober/clean with the help of AA.

I wish you well!

My sponsor always used to remind me early on that you don't get 5 years of clean time/sobriety until the earth goes around the sun five times. Hang in there.

You probably aren't...What step are you working on?...I'd make that my priority and get through them...Otherwise you're going to end up like a lot of people that go to rehab...Leave that safe little caccoon...Go back to the real world and right back to drugging....If NA is the program you are choosing to work...I'd suggest working it...I know you're tired...But I'm sure you could find an hour a day and put it towards step work..I'm sure you had an hour a day for drugging. Best of luck to you.

I haven't even started the first step... All I got through in treatment was my life time line and usage history. I have read the traditions and steps book but have yet to start working at it... I guess it is pretty obvious what I need to do. I start out patient treatment tonight.

Go to your meetings, stay close to your sponsor. Stay the course.

I find that helping others gets me out of me.

My sponsor used to say "You are right where you are supposed to be"... I hated that !!

Stay on the beam, cutsman, all will be well.

Bob R

That's a good one to start on....It'll take a little work...Not physical labor....Just getting completely honest with yourself...Is it worth it?....Yeah....Very much so...See what you can learn from the OP treatment tonight....You just got to get busy and change your life.

that timeline is telling you something. have you looked at it again?

sounds like step one progress is happening, get on with more of 'em!

You can do this sober!! :)