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What's best for me?

Old 03-15-2012, 05:39 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
KableTown
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Boise, ID
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What's best for me?

Hi there. New to the forum.

Here's the situation: I love someone who's an alcoholic. We split up because he chose alcohol over spending time with me one too many times. I'd made a rule (which I don't like to do) with him some months ago that I wouldn't hang out with him if he'd been drinking. At any rate, he chose to go to the bar and blow off our plans together last week. It was like being cheated on by someone who chose a really ugly chick with a crappy personality instead of me.

A few days later, he attempted suicide by alcohol and ended up in a rehab hospital. I was so angry and felt very manipulated. He apologized for doing this to me, and to his family and friends. Frankly, I was so relieved to see him alive and well and committed to recovering that I took him back.

I don't know if this is the right thing for me or not. This guy is smart, funny, highly moral, and very attractive *on the days he's sober*. As a drunk, I can't stand him. It would be a horrible loss for someone like him to waste his life and end up drinking out of a paper sack under a bridge somwhere, which is where I feel he was headed.

I am really confused by my feelings now, and I'm at a loss about whether or not to trust the idea that he can successfully recover. Just being honest.
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Old 03-15-2012, 05:55 PM
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This is the ultimate dilemma for all partners of alcoholics/people who drink too much: Will they ever get better.

Only one person can answer that and does he want to get better?
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Old 03-15-2012, 05:58 PM
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Welcome,

It might be a good idea for you to find an AlAnon meeting in your town. No one can know what's best for you, but you. I hope that you find peace in your life.
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Old 03-15-2012, 06:16 PM
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Welcome!

I was a jekyl and hyde personality at times, too. I offer hope that recovery is possible.

I wish you well in your choice!

Hugs,
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