Im desperate for help
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 90
Im desperate for help
Im scared im gona die. Im 26 and have been an alcoholic and bullimic since i was 13. I currently drink over a liter of vodka a day and i have no idea the last time i went a day without drinking (years). My entire life for the past 13 years has been nothing but alcoholism and eating disorder related. I have no friends due to my alcoholism and my entire family are alcoholics. My father is currently in liver and kidney failure but still drinks. My moms a fall down drunk. I dont wanna die and i need help, but im physically dependent on alcohol. I will get sick if i dont drink. I have no health insurance so i cant go to a hospital and im a little nerves about detoxing myself bc its dangerous. Will someone please tell me how to kick the booze. Ive been to multiple rehab centers and AA, it doesnt help. Its not my style and I still need my vodka to function.
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((Suffering))) - Welcome to SR!
I don't know where you live, but I don't have insurance or $$ either, and I just went to an ER 2 nights ago (not drug/drink related) and they had to take care of me. I may be on a payment plan until I'm 90, but I was taken care of.
Please, please, please go to a hospital. Be honest...they can't help you if they don't know the truth (I used to be a nurse, lost that career to addiction). Alcohol withdrawal can be serious at best, fatal at worst.
We are, and will be here for you. Please don't try this on your own.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
I don't know where you live, but I don't have insurance or $$ either, and I just went to an ER 2 nights ago (not drug/drink related) and they had to take care of me. I may be on a payment plan until I'm 90, but I was taken care of.
Please, please, please go to a hospital. Be honest...they can't help you if they don't know the truth (I used to be a nurse, lost that career to addiction). Alcohol withdrawal can be serious at best, fatal at worst.
We are, and will be here for you. Please don't try this on your own.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,560
Welcome suffering. I agree, you need help to detox safely. I was a daily drinker too, and my blood pressure was all over the place when I tried to quit on my own.
We're glad you found us - please keep reading and posting here - we care about you. You can have a whole new life, don't give up on yourself.
We're glad you found us - please keep reading and posting here - we care about you. You can have a whole new life, don't give up on yourself.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 90
Yes i went to a rehab for a drug addiction when i was 18 and i stayed there at the center for 6 months. they gave me medication for the alcohol withdraw, and i didnt feel a thing. I got arrested when i was 21 and had to attend a court mandated alcohol program, but i drank throughout the entire thing(im actually in a court mandated program now due to another arrest, but i could never tell them i still drink. Id go to jail). Im guessing the last time i was sober was prob. around 20.
Ive been hospitalized so many times due to alcohol poisioning that my medical bills are through the roof. I cant add to that amount. Im looking at city sponsored detox centers
Ive been hospitalized so many times due to alcohol poisioning that my medical bills are through the roof. I cant add to that amount. Im looking at city sponsored detox centers
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
We can help you kick the booze...Quite a few people here have done it...And would would be glad to help you...There's different ways if AA is not for you..We have some people that know them well....First you have to safely get cleaned up...That's priority number one...You can't help yourself if you're drinking...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 90
I live alone now. I moved out of my parents house at 21. I know i need to go somewhere to detox, but the hospital is not a good idea. Its wayyy to expensive. Im in alot of debt to hospital bills and i eventually want to clean up my financial situation.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 90
I havent even begun the research on city detox centers yet, but i live in a huge city (NYC) and i know there are tons of them. I would never go to my parents house. They make me worse and they get violent. Thats why i moved out. I talk to them as least as possible.
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by suffering0605 
I just wish i didnt physically need the alcohol. ughhhh
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
Sweetie, I am 5 years into recovery today, and I am STILL working on cleaning up my finances. That's why I didn't want to go to the ER..one more bill I'm going to have that I can't pay.
Thing is, you're not going to get a chance to clean up your finances if you have a stroke or die from trying to do this on your own. I hope you find another option, but this is your life you're talking about. You're worth it.
BTW, NYC is really great about helping out addicts/alcoholics. My stepsister is up there, in recovery, and I know of someone from here who also was helped out in recovery from the city.
Regardless, please don't do this on your own.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Thing is, you're not going to get a chance to clean up your finances if you have a stroke or die from trying to do this on your own. I hope you find another option, but this is your life you're talking about. You're worth it.
BTW, NYC is really great about helping out addicts/alcoholics. My stepsister is up there, in recovery, and I know of someone from here who also was helped out in recovery from the city.
Regardless, please don't do this on your own.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by suffering0605
I havent even begun the research on city detox centers yet, but i live in a huge city (NYC) and i know there are tons of them. I would never go to my parents house. They make me worse and they get violent. Thats why i moved out. I talk to them as least as possible.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 90
I know, i have plenty of options here in NYC. Im gona google detox centers and make some calls. If they cant help me, i'll have to go to the hospital and deal with the bills later. I know i cant detox on my own, i might have a seizure. It just really sucks about the finances. I support myself and dont have the option of asking my parents for help if i fall behind on my bills or rent. i REALLY appreciate all your concerns and feedback. Its making this decision alot easier to kick the damn boos. atleast im not the only one that got myself stuck in this boat.
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((Suffering))) - I'm not even to the point where I can support myself...50 years old, living back at home, though grateful I have that option. Thing is, my stepmom is an A, dad is a codie/enabler and my 18-year-old niece is something like a 4th or 5th generation ACOA and budding A.
Not the BEST of circumstances, but it is what it is. I'll pay the ER and surgeon (that I have to see on Monday) $5/month if that's all I can do. There are a slew of people in this country who can't pay their bills. Don't let it get you down....right now, you need help and if we, or whoever, can help get you into recovery? You'll do the best you can do.
My stepsister has 2 felonies, recently out of prison, but has found all kinds of help up there. I've been to NYC and it's HUGE, I don't know where she is, but she is the 2nd person I've seen receive help and despite her past? She is about to enter school (paid for) for substance abuse counselor.
I know that, right now, you aren't in the position to do all that. I want you to focus on your health. When the time comes? I think you'll find the help you need to get back on your feet.
You can do this, and there are a lot of us who will be here for you, but right now? Your health is my main concern.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Not the BEST of circumstances, but it is what it is. I'll pay the ER and surgeon (that I have to see on Monday) $5/month if that's all I can do. There are a slew of people in this country who can't pay their bills. Don't let it get you down....right now, you need help and if we, or whoever, can help get you into recovery? You'll do the best you can do.
My stepsister has 2 felonies, recently out of prison, but has found all kinds of help up there. I've been to NYC and it's HUGE, I don't know where she is, but she is the 2nd person I've seen receive help and despite her past? She is about to enter school (paid for) for substance abuse counselor.
I know that, right now, you aren't in the position to do all that. I want you to focus on your health. When the time comes? I think you'll find the help you need to get back on your feet.
You can do this, and there are a lot of us who will be here for you, but right now? Your health is my main concern.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
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