Hopefully this time will be different
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: London, UK
Posts: 92
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Congratulations on one month 
Don't hope, SB - do
Remember - you're not a passive passenger in your recovery - you're the engine driver
D
Don't hope, SB - do
Remember - you're not a passive passenger in your recovery - you're the engine driver
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: London, UK
Posts: 92
Now I have 2 months sober!
My original post wasn't strictly accurate, I gave the impression I didn't ever have blackouts, but I did frequently. When I finished the alcohol I had and the shops were still open I'd race down there and get another 4 cans (2 liters). I'd drink the first one or two and the next thing I know I'm waking up in bed hungover and wondering what I did the night before while blacked out. That would happen a couple of times a week sometimes more.
The alcoholism got to a point where I emailed a load of recovery centers in the UK asking for brochures and prices. I figured I'd get a month sober in a center with my savings then I'd probably last a month by myself for 2 months total. I thought if I could do that every year then 2 months sober per year would extend my life quite a bit. I really couldn't see myself quitting for good. The sober periods I'd had were so hard and I'd obsess about alcohol all day and give in eventually.
Back to this month just gone and I found the bank/public holidays hard. We have 2 around the Easter weekend which gives you a 4 day weekend and they were always massive drinking days in the past. But I did it. Boredom is a massive trigger but fortunately those alcohol thoughts are dismissed as soon as they appear. This is now the longest I've been sober in 10+ years and I'm feeling good. I'm so lucky to have had that epiphany 2 months ago. Here's looking forward to the future.
My original post wasn't strictly accurate, I gave the impression I didn't ever have blackouts, but I did frequently. When I finished the alcohol I had and the shops were still open I'd race down there and get another 4 cans (2 liters). I'd drink the first one or two and the next thing I know I'm waking up in bed hungover and wondering what I did the night before while blacked out. That would happen a couple of times a week sometimes more.
The alcoholism got to a point where I emailed a load of recovery centers in the UK asking for brochures and prices. I figured I'd get a month sober in a center with my savings then I'd probably last a month by myself for 2 months total. I thought if I could do that every year then 2 months sober per year would extend my life quite a bit. I really couldn't see myself quitting for good. The sober periods I'd had were so hard and I'd obsess about alcohol all day and give in eventually.
Back to this month just gone and I found the bank/public holidays hard. We have 2 around the Easter weekend which gives you a 4 day weekend and they were always massive drinking days in the past. But I did it. Boredom is a massive trigger but fortunately those alcohol thoughts are dismissed as soon as they appear. This is now the longest I've been sober in 10+ years and I'm feeling good. I'm so lucky to have had that epiphany 2 months ago. Here's looking forward to the future.
dude in recovery
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Gulf Coast, TX
Posts: 1,504
Congrats Sometime!
You will love it even more past 90, or I sure did & do. At 180 I broke down emotionally for a bit and honestly found it hard believe the overall change in me.
Sure hope you stick with it and be grateful for every sober day.
You will love it even more past 90, or I sure did & do. At 180 I broke down emotionally for a bit and honestly found it hard believe the overall change in me.
Sure hope you stick with it and be grateful for every sober day.
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