Just another drunkard scared of dying...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Airdrie
Posts: 6
Just another drunkard scared of dying... Hello everyone,
This is my first time posting on this site and I can't say I'm proud of myself.
This thread would probably belong in the Alcohol Withdrawal section, I just didn't know how to post there...
First I would like to say how thankful I am to those who started this site, who run it and maintain it: I don't know who you are, why you do this, what you get out of it, but I think you are truly amazing people.
Now the reason I am posting this is that I am a little worried...
On the 31st of January, I decided to clean up my act and go "cold turkey", after binge-drinking throughout the Christmas Holidays.
Two days later I was in the ER with pretty scary symptoms. I was having very disturbing chest pains, I had trouble breathing, I thought I was going to faint and then, out of the blue, I had a panic attack. All Hell broke loose: my heart started racing and it felt like it was going to come flying right out of my chest - I never experienced anything like it, although I have gone through withdrawal before!
This made me think and I decided to stop drinking.
Three weeks later, I got the results of the scans I had done on my liver to see if it had been damaged by a 10-year drinking "career", which involved drinking at least a sixpack of extra-strong brown ale every night of the week (9%), and then turning into the consummate weekend-warrior on weekends.
Turns out everything was fine - I also got the results of the bloodwork and even my enzymes were fine!
Well, I think most of you can guess what happened next: I decided that if putting my liver through this kind of abuse didn't do so much as give me fibrosis, I was made of steel and good to go.
So two nights later, completely oblivious to the withdrawal symptoms that had scared the living cr*p out of me three weeks earlier, I did something I never did before: I drank a fifth of Vodka and started on a Mickey - and then duly passed out.
The next day (yesterday), I drank the remaining half of the bottle (about 200 ml.) and to my surprise, got almost no withdrawal symptoms.
I guess, at this point, my question is whether the best is yet to come...
Perhaps drinking the other half of the bottle the next day would count as "tapering off" and I have nothing to fear, or am I to expect another panic attack in the near future?
I am not asking for medical advice and I will seek medical attention if I have to - as I have done in the past, even though I find it humiliating - but I know you people are used to dealing with this sort of thing and would probably know what to expect, according to my drinking pattern.
Any help would be greatly appreciated.
Once again, I must say I am extremely grateful for what the selfless members of this community do, providing much-needed encouragement to the many hapless and ill-informed victims of the scourge that is alcohol abuse.
This is my first time posting on this site and I can't say I'm proud of myself.
This thread would probably belong in the Alcohol Withdrawal section, I just didn't know how to post there...
First I would like to say how thankful I am to those who started this site, who run it and maintain it: I don't know who you are, why you do this, what you get out of it, but I think you are truly amazing people.
Now the reason I am posting this is that I am a little worried...
On the 31st of January, I decided to clean up my act and go "cold turkey", after binge-drinking throughout the Christmas Holidays.
Two days later I was in the ER with pretty scary symptoms. I was having very disturbing chest pains, I had trouble breathing, I thought I was going to faint and then, out of the blue, I had a panic attack. All Hell broke loose: my heart started racing and it felt like it was going to come flying right out of my chest - I never experienced anything like it, although I have gone through withdrawal before!
This made me think and I decided to stop drinking.
Three weeks later, I got the results of the scans I had done on my liver to see if it had been damaged by a 10-year drinking "career", which involved drinking at least a sixpack of extra-strong brown ale every night of the week (9%), and then turning into the consummate weekend-warrior on weekends.
Turns out everything was fine - I also got the results of the bloodwork and even my enzymes were fine!
Well, I think most of you can guess what happened next: I decided that if putting my liver through this kind of abuse didn't do so much as give me fibrosis, I was made of steel and good to go.
So two nights later, completely oblivious to the withdrawal symptoms that had scared the living cr*p out of me three weeks earlier, I did something I never did before: I drank a fifth of Vodka and started on a Mickey - and then duly passed out.
The next day (yesterday), I drank the remaining half of the bottle (about 200 ml.) and to my surprise, got almost no withdrawal symptoms.
I guess, at this point, my question is whether the best is yet to come...
Perhaps drinking the other half of the bottle the next day would count as "tapering off" and I have nothing to fear, or am I to expect another panic attack in the near future?
I am not asking for medical advice and I will seek medical attention if I have to - as I have done in the past, even though I find it humiliating - but I know you people are used to dealing with this sort of thing and would probably know what to expect, according to my drinking pattern.
Any help would be greatly appreciated.
Once again, I must say I am extremely grateful for what the selfless members of this community do, providing much-needed encouragement to the many hapless and ill-informed victims of the scourge that is alcohol abuse.
MINEr
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Bay Area, Ca
Posts: 505
Withdrawals vary from person to person, and from time to time. I've had some easier ones, my last ones came damn close to killing me(3 seizures and six days in the ICU). If you are planning on following through without another drink, keep an eye on things and get a doctors opinion, there is no set answer as to what may happen, Most of my most serious symptoms didn't hit till the second or third day. Good luck.
Sober Alcoholic
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 3,539
I’d say the short answer is that nobody knows for sure. Given your description, my guess is that it’s just a matter of time…. unless, that is, you address the underlying causes and conditions of your alcohol use.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Welcome KnowledgeSeeker.....It amazes me the things an alcoholic will put themself through....To go through a scare like that and go right back to it...I know...I did that for 35 fricken years...And it only gets worse....I think the best thing you can do is to stop...For good...As bad as that may sound to you...It's the only way to do it...There are ways...Have you put any thought into something you'd be willing to do...To stop for good?
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,373
Well, I think most of you can guess what happened next: I decided that if putting my liver through this kind of abuse didn't do so much as give me fibrosis, I was made of steel and good to go.
Noone here can accurately predict whether you suffer another panic attack or not now...the reson we recommend people see Drs here is that withdrawals can often defy prediction....
but it stands to reason to me that not drinking at all will not only keep your liver in he state it's in, but will afford you the best chance of not suffering the same sort of panic attack again
D
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,960
I was told at 94% the liver results are "normal" and at 95% they are abnormal. Third party information, but I'm not testing it out.
Withdrawal, as you noticed, changes. Next time could be your time for a seizure.
Your choice in playing this game of life and death.
I wish you well in sobriety!
Withdrawal, as you noticed, changes. Next time could be your time for a seizure.
Your choice in playing this game of life and death.
I wish you well in sobriety!
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Welcome, Knowledge Seeker. I agree with your comments concerning SR. This site and the stalwarts who support it have saved thousands of lives I would estimate. I know of one for sure. Dee74, you know who I refer to as an SR stalwart I hope. Some sorta ninja councilor/moderator/addict-whisperer superhuman creation who amazes me on a regular basis.
Back to you, KnowledgeSeeker. I think your question is along these lines: given my drinking history, what can I expect next? That is very very easy to answer, my friend. Get ready for a helluva ride, and each stop along that road will be the loss of something that makes your life worth living. Loss of self respect, health, respect of others, loving relationships, sanity, employment, shelter, these are the big stops along that journey you are on. But you knew that already.
Keep posting here because you will find support and encouragement. Great folks.
Back to you, KnowledgeSeeker. I think your question is along these lines: given my drinking history, what can I expect next? That is very very easy to answer, my friend. Get ready for a helluva ride, and each stop along that road will be the loss of something that makes your life worth living. Loss of self respect, health, respect of others, loving relationships, sanity, employment, shelter, these are the big stops along that journey you are on. But you knew that already.
Keep posting here because you will find support and encouragement. Great folks.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Airdrie
Posts: 6
Thank you all for taking the time to read this.
I got some sleep last night - I hadn't slept at all the night before, as I was afraid something dangerous might happen in my sleep. Truth of the matter is, I feel fine now - and that's what scares me: could the worst be yet to come?
As for my determination to stop drinking, I will only say this: had I known how dangerous drinking was, I would never have started in the first place - at this point, I believe governments are guilty of not speaking out against a potentially lethal drug. How come cannabis, cocaine or heroin are illegal and not alcohol? But that is a discussion I don't really care to get into. I know it can degenerate quite easily.
In fact, I quit drinking for ten years when I was 21 and I also quit smoking at the same time. This is proof enough for me that I have some measure of control over what I do. Like I said, the main reason I started drinking again was that I honestly thought it was just clean, innocuous fun - the adverse effects of alcohol not being very well publicized, in my opinion.
As for the self-loathing, the inexplicable hatred of humanity that overcome me after an episode of binge drinking, I know all about them and I do not wish to go on experiencing them.
I have a lot of things going for me - I have a great career, I am affluent and, most importantly, I have purpose in my life. When I don't drink, I am a genuinely happy person and I only did drink because I thought I would get an kick out of it - at no extra cost.
Well, I guess it doesn't quite work that way.
Thanks again for listening to my rant and have a most pleasant day.
Phil
I got some sleep last night - I hadn't slept at all the night before, as I was afraid something dangerous might happen in my sleep. Truth of the matter is, I feel fine now - and that's what scares me: could the worst be yet to come?
As for my determination to stop drinking, I will only say this: had I known how dangerous drinking was, I would never have started in the first place - at this point, I believe governments are guilty of not speaking out against a potentially lethal drug. How come cannabis, cocaine or heroin are illegal and not alcohol? But that is a discussion I don't really care to get into. I know it can degenerate quite easily.
In fact, I quit drinking for ten years when I was 21 and I also quit smoking at the same time. This is proof enough for me that I have some measure of control over what I do. Like I said, the main reason I started drinking again was that I honestly thought it was just clean, innocuous fun - the adverse effects of alcohol not being very well publicized, in my opinion.
As for the self-loathing, the inexplicable hatred of humanity that overcome me after an episode of binge drinking, I know all about them and I do not wish to go on experiencing them.
I have a lot of things going for me - I have a great career, I am affluent and, most importantly, I have purpose in my life. When I don't drink, I am a genuinely happy person and I only did drink because I thought I would get an kick out of it - at no extra cost.
Well, I guess it doesn't quite work that way.
Thanks again for listening to my rant and have a most pleasant day.
Phil
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: LA, California
Posts: 372
Prohibition was known as one of the governments biggest failures. Alcohol will never be illegal again. Sorry, I'm just a history buff, not starting an argument haha. That being said I still don't know what you're trying to do. Have you quit drinking yet? Or are you trying to quit?
I'm here to learn!
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: I'm on it!
Posts: 2,038
No one here is qualified to give you advice about withdrawal symptoms. My best suggestion is to go to the doctor if you're concerned.
Best wishes in pursuing a life free from alcohol going forward.
Best wishes in pursuing a life free from alcohol going forward.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Airdrie
Posts: 6
Sugarbear, I'm not so sure I understand what you mean... Is it that one doctor told you that your results were normal and the other said they weren't, even though they were almost identical?
Thanks for your kind words and apporpriate warning, Freshstart. I really do appreciate it.
Dee, you speak words of wisdom, as always.
And Camedown, one of the main reasons I want to stop drinking is precisely the Kindling effect which I had no idea even existed before I started coming to this site.
Thanks again everyone!
Thanks for your kind words and apporpriate warning, Freshstart. I really do appreciate it.
Dee, you speak words of wisdom, as always.
And Camedown, one of the main reasons I want to stop drinking is precisely the Kindling effect which I had no idea even existed before I started coming to this site.
Thanks again everyone!
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,960
Talking about an oldtimer who used to get his results from his doctor, and every time he was "okay with his levels" he chose to drink, then went into the hospital when the levels weren't okay. He played a nasty game with his liver. When you go to your doctor, see if it's true, I got this third hand. Might have just been a scare tactic someone heard from rehab, I'm not sure.
I wish you a sober life.
I wish you a sober life.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Sober State
Posts: 1,126
Knowledge, I too quit drinking/smoking at 23ish for 7-8 yrs. now the past 5-6 yrs, just started as weekend fun, stress relief, then every other day, then everyday. I'm only 110 lb woman & I was drinking 10-15 shots of vodka.
Started as 2-3 shots.
It's a progressive disease. It will only get worse, never better.
Someone quoted Dee as saying its not the drunks that are bad, but the ones that are good that cause more damage b/c you think you can keep doing it. Like you got away with it. But eventually it catches up to you.
You can quit now before it's even harder.
Withdrawals suck & I'm happy I will never have to experience them again.
Started as 2-3 shots.
It's a progressive disease. It will only get worse, never better.
Someone quoted Dee as saying its not the drunks that are bad, but the ones that are good that cause more damage b/c you think you can keep doing it. Like you got away with it. But eventually it catches up to you.
You can quit now before it's even harder.
Withdrawals suck & I'm happy I will never have to experience them again.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Airdrie
Posts: 6
Well, Purplecatlover, I think it is in the process of catching up to me and I don't like it.
As I said before, I have learned a lot since I started coming to this site - a lot of things that are not widely known. The effects of smoking are so much more apparent. They're not insidious like alcohol. I don't want to damage my health and when I see that something does, I quit it.
As I said before, I have learned a lot since I started coming to this site - a lot of things that are not widely known. The effects of smoking are so much more apparent. They're not insidious like alcohol. I don't want to damage my health and when I see that something does, I quit it.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by KnowledgeSeeker 
As for my determination to stop drinking, I will only say this: had I known how dangerous drinking was, I would never have started in the first place - at this point, I believe governments are guilty of not speaking out against a potentially lethal drug. How come cannabis, cocaine or heroin are illegal and not alcohol? But that is a discussion I don't really care to get into. I know it can degenerate quite easily.
In fact, I quit drinking for ten years when I was 21 and I also quit smoking at the same time. This is proof enough for me that I have some measure of control over what I do. Like I said, the main reason I started drinking again was that I honestly thought it was just clean, innocuous fun - the adverse effects of alcohol not being very well publicized, in my opinion.
As for the self-loathing, the inexplicable hatred of humanity that overcome me after an episode of binge drinking, I know all about them and I do not wish to go on experiencing them.
I have a lot of things going for me - I have a great career, I am affluent and, most importantly, I have purpose in my life. When I don't drink, I am a genuinely happy person and I only did drink because I thought I would get an kick out of it - at no extra cost.
Well, I guess it doesn't quite work that way.
Thanks again for listening to my rant and have a most pleasant day.
Phil
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Airdrie
Posts: 6
I am sorry to say, Sapling, I can sense a lot of sarcasm and intellectual dishonesty in your last post.
Unless I am mistaken, I get the impression that the only way out of a bad habit, in your opinion, is AA.
I don't believe this to be the case. In fact, I have personally proven, for then years, that this is not the case - unless you are prepared to regard 10 years of sobriety as insignificant.
Like I said, this site has opened my eyes to the dangers of alcohol abuse. For this I thank you all.
I will bother you no more.
Unless I am mistaken, I get the impression that the only way out of a bad habit, in your opinion, is AA.
I don't believe this to be the case. In fact, I have personally proven, for then years, that this is not the case - unless you are prepared to regard 10 years of sobriety as insignificant.
Like I said, this site has opened my eyes to the dangers of alcohol abuse. For this I thank you all.
I will bother you no more.
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