eh1988

Wow, I've had a very productive, sober day. Went to work early, stayed late, came home and made dinner for my fiance and I. But she is going to leave to her parents house in about an hour and I think this is the toughest part of sobriety. Being alone in my house, with no one looking, is a scary thought. I don't have any alcohol in the house right now(poured out a 12 pack this morning) but I know that urge, and being within a quarter mile of 3 liquor stores isn't exactly the best thing for a person like me. I just hope I can watch some tv and fall asleep early, God I hope that happens. Wish me luck guys!

desertsong

I get that, eh. My husband is still an active alcoholic and every other night he heads to the bar, probably because he no longer has his "drinking buddy" and he needs to be around other alkies. I get it. Months ago, his leaving for the bar would have given me just the excuse (and lack of supervision) that I needed to go on my own drinking binge. Not anymore.

Watch TV, find a diversion (SR, music, TV, whatever it takes to get your mind off the bottle) and then fall into bed for a nice, sober sleep. I wish you all the luck in the world (although it isn't luck so much as a choice ... but you already know that, my friend).

Enjoy a sober night and a sober night's sleep.

Dee74

you can do this, eh

D

Eliz181144

Wishing you much fortitude. Look forward to tomorrows post about you restful night and another day sober. It's not easy but it is rewarding.

Anewlife4me11

You can do this eh1988!! Stay strong and use the support you have in this wonderful group!

gaffo

Figuring out how to be comfortable without drinking in your own house--priceless.

artsoul

Being alone felt weird at first for me, too - it was the time when I gave myself permission to drink without reservation. Not good!

Take in minute by minute if you have to - the urges will come and go but just remember they don't last forever. Time will go by and before long it will be tomorrow - think about how you want to feel in the morning and don't let your addiction win this time!

eJoshua

Hang in there. Browse around SR, play some free internet games, read a book, do something to keep your mind busy.

Snarf

Don't worry about being alone in your house with no watching eyes. I once heard someone say, "Character is what you do when nobody's looking." I spent so much of my life hiding things from other people, or doing things when other people wouldn't see me, that I had absolutely no control over myself. Sure, it's one thing to blame problems on "peer pressure" or hanging out with other folks who overindulge, but what's our excuse when we're by ourselves and STILL make foolish decisions?

I had to learn how to be by myself, with no one around, and make the right decisions simply because they were the right decisions, not because someone else could see me doing it. I had to realize that it didn't matter who saw me do or not do something. I would know the truth, and God would see me, so if I can't hide it from myself or God, what's really the point in hiding it anyway? So I had to understand that in order for me to avoid that internal conflict, I just had to stop doing things that I would have to hide or lie about. Don't want someone to find out I'm drinking? That no longer means finding a clever way to hide it; it now means not doing the thing I don't want other people to see, namely drinking.

sugarbear1

XA-Speakers - The lights are on! take a listen! I still fall asleep to it.....

GirlFromCO

Hang in there. I used to live a block away from the liquor store. It was almost like walking to the fridge, lol. A very expensive, dangerous fridge. Sometimes it's best if you can go to bed a bit early. Tomorrow's a new day and you want to be bright eyed and busy tailed to face it

eh1988

thanks for the replies. I've been trying to stay busy and not fall asleep just yet (even though I'm tired) because I know my sleep routine and I'd end up waking up at 3am or so. So I'm trying to hold off until midnight or a little later.

GirlFromCO

That's only 90 minutes from now. You can make it You can do 90 minutes standing on your head.

eh1988

haha, true. Just hope I can stay asleep tonight.

Anewlife4me11

I hope so too!!!!!

GirlFromCO

Even if you don't sleep through the night tonight, you will someday soon. Trust me My buddy ReadyandAble posted this in someone else's thread but it's so good and so true: what you do today is an investment in tomorrow. 45 minutes more... halfway there!

eh1988

Haha, yea I understand. I've been here before, the first few days is always the hardest. The difference between now and the other times, is this time I'm trying to quit for good. I'm not just saying "I'm going to stop drinking for a month".....this is it for me, I'm done with alcohol. I'm only 23 but I've had more experiences with alcohol than most 50 year olds and that's not right.

GirlFromCO

I used to think that... now I realize that the first few days were pretty easy because I felt like crap and I remembered how awful it was, lol. Not trying to be a bummer or anything - you're going to feel better soon and then watch out because it will seem like a good idea again. Learning how to delay gratification was so so hard for me, personally. I was always like, well I'm not feeling bad right now tonight, so why not? The first few days of THAT were the toughest for me. That gets easier too though, with time. 15 minutes!

eh1988

Haha, I'm laying in bed with my laptop (probably not the best idea if I want to sleep) but I get like this when I stop drinking. Body is tired, mind is racing. Sucks