Missy7

So it's Day Eight. Evening actually. I am so proud of myself for what I have achieved. I have done fine. Haven't even been seriously tempted. Even though we went to a charity bowling thing last night with my kids and gkids. The gkids were quite challenging and we had free drink vouchers but I had Sparkling Water!! Then we went and played cards with the adult kids, and while we didn't win, I was pretty funny and never did anything too stupid. Yay.

But I just don't feel that good yet. I keep falling asleep and I'm not motivated. And we HAD to go grocery shopping today, but as we were driving I started feeling sad about not being able to go into pubs. I love pubs. They are little vacations from life. Of course, they then become big vacations from life, but even the worst look friendly. Does this longing stop?

Anyway, stories of when my sober friends' energies became more solid would be appreciated.

Hope all of you are doing well. I hope I start to feel better so that I can get active and move on.

quitforme79

I don't have much advice for you...I'm too new but sounds like you had a great day and you should be proud of yourself

janiebluebird

Its easy to forget how bad going to bars/pubs is for you the further removed you are from your last hang over or withdrawal. I'm 2 weeks sober and going strong, but I have had fleeting thoughts of "good" times I've had out at the bars. Thinking that you can never do something again inherently makes you feel sad in a way. Then I remind myself of my very last hang over, and ones before that, and of how good I feel today.

Dee74

It stops

But looking at it this way - drinking was a huge part of my life for 20 years - it was all I knew as an adult...

It will take a while for you to accept that, then to be happy about it, and then prefer the change

I used to wonder why recovery was so hard - then I worked out if it wasn't so hard, I'd probably just take it for granted.

D

instant

Missy . My take is that the 'longing' and 'wistfulness' , feeling left out, experiences are the long tail of withdrawal. What I came to see as emotional episodes happened to me on and off for about six months, but that's not to say I was miserable the whole time.

I think my emotional system was totally corrupted. It gets better.

Terminally Unique

Missy:

Part of me is quite hesitant to tell you how long it too me to "settle in," since I am mindful that it might dissuade you or otherwise not correlate with your experience, but it took me about four and half months for the clouds to start to part. I was, however, drinking hard liquor all day every day for a couple years by the end, so YMMV.

I've followed your posts, however, and the best advice that I can give you is that you have to go into this 'recovery' thing for better or for worse — kind of like marriage. Things will certainly improve over time, but if you go in with conditions attached, you'll likely end up throwing in the towel before you ever get there.

neferkamichael

I'm proud of you too. 8 days, you are FANTASTIC!

frances2011

Totally gets better.

My experience is that my energies became more solid and the longings receded when I went through the hard, scary, difficult emotions/situations SOBER and I came through it learning, knowing, owning and feeling proud of myself.

I avoided most trigger situations for the first two months because I felt prickly and raw and defenseless. I had my half-marathon goal & training so that was a perfect excuse for turning down invitations.

My experience is that the white-knuckling phase (NO FUN) lessens as you get better at surfing the urges (SORTA FUN) and then riding the wave of being Sober (FUN)

One HUGE milestone was attending a friend's baby shower sober. Hoooo boy that was hard, I went in with a plan and brought a case of seltzer. I texted SR from the bathroom and took breathing breaks. I threw myself into being the the best helper ever and by the end of the day I had contributed 1000% to making it a success instead of being the drunky-drunk woman making snide remarks.

frances2011

LOL on your comment about falling asleep and not feeling motivated. Boy I relate! My experience was that I did a LOT of sleeping in early recovery because my body needed it to heal physically. That's a GOOD thing.

2granddaughters

Going to meetings, working the Steps and helping others gets me motivated.

Left on my own I tend to slow to a crawl and start complaining about being bored and/or discontent. Life seems to "fall short" when I'm in my own head.

Recovery is a lot like school for me, as long as I'm showing up and participating things go well and keep improving. I can quit anytime I want but then the progress would cease and I'd likely start sliding backward. My choice every day.

Wishing you the best on your road to recovery.

Bob R

sober4metoday

8 days! Congratulations! If you walked into that pub how many of those folks would be proud of you?

Purplecatlover

Day 8, I was curled up in the fetal position on my bathroom rug, sobbing my eyes out. That was my worst day.
But getting better & better everyday. I'm happy again.
Congrats! Keep going. Never give up.

FlyerFan

Keep hanging in there Missy. I was a wreck for at least 2 weeks, lol. It does get better, I promise you that.

jocata

Great job on the 8 days.

My emotions were pretty unstable for awhile. Still don't have the energy that I used to but it's coming back little by little.

Are you working any kind of program to keep you busy?

God bless.