zorah

I made it two weeks. I'm not even that addicted (physically) and 2 weeks is hard. The reason: I'm depressed and hate myself. I vacillate between trying to be compassionate and feeling like the most worthless piece of crap in the world. Was I God's lab experiment gone wrong? I feel like a freak of nature.

I know this will pass. I'm on medication for bipolar and adhd and anxiety disorder. I had to get of the booze because it was messing with my meds as well as me. I can see why I went for booze though: that relieving aaaahhhh feeling that takes all the torment away.

Coming off, though, has skyrocketed my self-loathing.

Grateful to be able to share this with caring souls.


Zorah

Fubarcdn

Hang in there. It will probably get better soon. It is possible that the alcohol was and still is affecting the job that your meds are supposed to be doing.
Keep at it. The first few weeks are the toughest.

Dee74

I think nearly everyone suffers depression once they stop drinking Zorah - 2 weeks is by no means unusual.

I had self image issues too - my perception changed after I was sober for a while - I think yours will too - hang in there

D

scrambled2012

it gets better zorah; one day at a time

Elisabeth888

You are not alone. Some days I feel like jumping out of my skin.

MycoolFitz

Keep the faith freind I have been diagonsed with GADs, Depression, PTSD but drinking drugs never a solution just a cover up, my friends here learning how to laugh again walking dog, been on major depression cycle but should get on bicycle. You take care. Thanks for posting

Sharzy

I'm 2 weeks too and get waves of pure hatred for myself but as someone posted above, hopefully I will find a better perception soon, and you too.
Keep going. x
xxx

zorah

thanx everyone. perspective is hard when you're stuck in the crazy brain. but you've helped me to see beyond this moment, this pain.

blessings

zorah

sissy07

The hard thing about the first few months of quitting alcohol is that your mind starts clearing, and you realize all the bad and sad things you did to others, the opportunities missed, and the general mess that is now there to clean up. The kicker is you have to do all that sober, without the crutch that temporarily helped to escape those feelings. Dealing with the mess I made and the regrets that I have is devastating. The great thing about this is that as you get more clarity and begin to clean things up (it takes a lot of time....be patient) you begin to acquire self-esteem and self-respect. The solution of calming your nerves and depression with alcohol is the problem. After all, alcohol is a depressant, and it screws with medication in a big way. Give yourself some time. I know it is hard and I am sorry that you are going through this, but give yourself some credit for weathering the storm. Take care and try to be good to yourself. You are living in the solution now, and it will get better. Promise.