perea3

I woke up today realizing that even though I have still been drinking that I love , the AA meetings, the people, what they tell/offer me. WHAT I DON'T LIKE, IS MY LIFE. I come home to a drugged up drunk husband, yes he has cancer but they can't find it any more so why all the pills.
HERE IS A LIST OF THINGS I MISS,
Someone to hold me
kiss me
listen to me
talk to me
SEX 8 years now
I'm 63 not 93
to all of you suffering at the hands of a [LOVED ONE] I know how you feel.
We have been married 20 years in June. I want to run and hide.
I can't leave but I don't want to stay.
Good luck my friends
Diana

scrambled2012

Prayer is not an old woman’s idle amusement. Properly understood and applied, it is the most potent instrument of action.
~ Mahatma Gandhi

Dee74

I think there's speal challenges that come with dealing with a loved one who's sick, just as there's challenges with dealing with someone who's addicted.

I'm not really sure from your post where your husband falls in that sick/addicted spectrum but there are support groups out there, Diana.

Don't let the stress of whatever you're dealing with drive you back to drinking. Drinking is no solution - ever.

D

Sapling

Then change it.....You can let it drag you down and drink yourself to death with your husband....By the way...If they can't find the cancer anymore...How is he getting the pills?...Or you can continue to go to AA which you enjoy and work the program and at least be around people that are sober. You are right...You have a lot of life ahead of you...You sound like you want to live it......Not real sure why you HAVE to stay...My wife left me because I was a hopeless drunk...It was the best thing that happened for both of us. I wish you the best. I hope you find what you are looking for.

MsJax

Perea, I feel the pain in your post Being free of alcohol will help you make decisions to better your life, but you know that! I too was in a loveless, sexless relationship for over 15 years. Getting out of it 2.5 years ago was the best thing that could have happened. I see it now as our years are slipping by. We have only a blink of an eye here. How do you want to live? Are you being a martyr? Why do you have to stay in this relationship? You are in a mire right now but you can get out. You have so many years left to live the life you deserve. You don't have to drink. You can start today.