quitforme79

I know someone who was sober 7 years and went back to drinking. So far (for the past 5 months) , he has been able to control it-- having 2 beers or a glass of wine with dinner. I don't get it...isn't that impossible for a so called alcoholic? I am not looking to use him as my excuse to try moderated drinking..hell I have tried that many many times and I know it doesn't work. But I'm just curious if anyone has seen this happen? Is it really only a matter of time before his disease takes over or will he be the lucky 1 in a million?

augustwest

who knows? time will tell. in my experience everyone i know who has relapsed returned to their old patterns, typically worse, and typically quickly.

i relapsed on "two margaritas". that lasted two days. day three i bought a bottle. day four i was at my drug dealers house.

quitforme79

Yes august...many others I have seen relapse turned to old behaviors pretty quickly. I genuinely worry about this person which I guess is why it's bothering me. I know we all have our journey and I need to just focus on myself. Thanks for your response

GirlFromCO

Is he cured? I don't know. I do know that if I try to moderate my drinking, it will end in disaster and I'll have to start this whole process over from day 1. Day 1 is not my idea of a fun time

Sapling

I don't know what his drinking history is...It's possible he was never an alcoholic to begin with...Did you know him when he was drinking?...I know for myself...I could never pull that off.

Terminally Unique

No, it is not impossible, nor do people always get 'out of control' overnight. More often than not, people drink, and nothing bad happens, at least at first. So, since they didn't get 'out of control' right away, as is often incorrectly claimed will always happen, they keep at it. That said, re-addiction usually occurs much faster than the initial addiction, so he is certainly playing with fire if he doesn't keep this in mind. If he believes his body has magically 'forgotten' how to adapt to increasing amounts of alcohol, he may be in for a surprise.

nairb

Its hard to say but that story is more the exception than the norm. I gave it up for nearly 20 years and then thought I could handle it. For the first year or so I was giving the impression that I was in control to me and others around me but a few years later and here I am

keepfinding2

Many people can just return to normal drinking just fine. It does happen probably more often than we think. I know I could at the length of sobriety that I've had, but I'm not going to test it just yet. 3 beers would probably make me vomit and I don't want to ever go back to vodka/rum.

The term "alcoholic" is just a term. Kind of like saying an alcoholic has a "disease". It's not really a disease like cancer, it's just a fake label. You are bound to hear all kinds of terminology on this site: illness, disease, condition, predisposition etc... I like the other response by August West in that "Time Will Tell". So far he is playing it safe with Beer and Wine. Hard to get too out of control with this combo, though not impossible, but it could always give rise to the hard stuff and that is dangerous.

I guess if he keeps it up at the pace he is going he is bound to live longer than the rest of us.

jocata

Beer was definately not safe for me. Nor do I believe it to be safe for anyone who cannot control the amount of alcohol they consume. I have gotten out of control many times consuming just beer.

God bless.

macknacat

beer and wine "safe" ? wow. not for me. And i have plenty of ol drinking buddies who now have bad livers, multi DUIs, gutter dwelling lives etc etc on "just" beer and wine.
I buy into the "disease" motif- takes the moral issue off the playing field, also puts the "ism" into a place where i could gather a bit of objectivity- and so far as i have seen, it really does seem to have a capacity to lie dormant for some time and then its off to the races. So i don't get too hung up on what we call it- OCD, genetic predisposition, brain anomaly , or just a rational response to an irrational world- just glad i am sober today
of course i want to fixate on the one possible exception to the rule- but then again, I figured if Keith Richards or Hunter Thompson could do it , so could I... turned out- not so much.... never mind...

Anna

I have an aunt who was addicted to alcohol and tranquilizers. I now see her drink a glass of wine occasionally and I don't question it. In fact, the circumstances in her life have changed dramatically from when she was addicted. She is now in her eighties and is making the choice to drink very occasionally.

Sapling

I have no problem calling myself an alcoholic...I have no problem saying I suffer from the disease of alcoholism....And I have no problem saying beer almost killed me.

Dee74

I have no idea about your friend quit - but if his head is anything like mine would be doing that, I feel for him.

I know my dysfunctional relationship with alcohol is a permanent one - because I figure it's not really about the alcohol so much at all - it's about me.

I had dysfunctional relationships with a lot of other things and substances too.

There's no day in the future where I'll be able to go back to drinking and be 'normal' about it - and I'm at peace with that - in fact I'm happy about it

and...beer and wine nearly killed me - so go figure....

D

penny74

Yes That can happen.
l have seen people do it.
Some people can just turn a switch.

Sapling

I'm not real sure I get the point here Anna. The circumstances have changed dramatically in my life too...In just a short eight months. But I know that I can not pick up one beer and drink it safely. I'm sure my life will continue to change dramatically as I continue to not drink. I guess I just don't understand the message here..I mean...I'm not sure I would want to try and find out in my eighties...If I can or can not drink safely. I know I can't.

penny74

Sapling, l too have seen this.
Some people have such life changing experiences that they can do that.
Even alcohol loses it's power over them.

Sapling

I'll have to take your word for it...Because I'm not going to try and find out. Now that I see I can live content and at peace with myself and others without alcohol....I don't think I'd go back to drinking even if I knew I could.

sugarbear1

Alcoholism is a disease in the DSM in the medical community. I'm sure there is a definition of "disease" in there, too.

Labels aside, some of us can't drink again after stopping or we'd be back where we left off, or worse, and some can moderate or limit their intake.

I prefer not to take that chance. Like the spectrum of Autism, I believe there's a spectrum of "those of us with problems drinking, moderating, or abstaining from alcohol." Whew!

katrinka

I have known people who changed from abusing alcohol to being moderate drinkers but I don't think I could. Maybe when I'm 80 I'll try it......or not. And I'm definitely addicted to wine! There's beer in the house and it doesn't tempt me.

langkah

Know a guy who wanted to prove everyone wrong who had said he couldn't control his drinking and did that for almost a year and a half before falling off the usual cliff. He drug himself back into sobriety and stuck for another 2 years before just getting tired of all the people saying controlled drinking is a bad idea and doesn't last, so he did it another year before collapsing in a drunken mess and doing the usual detox follies.

The funny thing is he thinks that he proved everyone wrong and that he can control his drinking, not even a clue that people were never saying loss of control was always immediate.