Baffling...some opinions?
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: United States
Posts: 184
Speaking with personal experience only, I have never known an alcoholic that tried to drink casually and succeed.
I tried to "control" my drinking for a few months. It seemed that as time went on, I kept adding more alcohol to my regimen that I considered "normal." lol! When I finally fell off of the casual drinking wagon, I fell hard.
Whenever Dad told Mom that he was "cutting back", that just meant that he found a new place to hide his booze.
I tried to "control" my drinking for a few months. It seemed that as time went on, I kept adding more alcohol to my regimen that I considered "normal." lol! When I finally fell off of the casual drinking wagon, I fell hard.
Whenever Dad told Mom that he was "cutting back", that just meant that he found a new place to hide his booze.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: east coast
Posts: 1,711
Wow lot's of great responses all, thank you! I am finally home from work and was really glad to see so many of you chime in. I didn't know him while he was drinking and drugging back in the day but a really bad event occured that caused him to get clean. He will admit he's an addict (to all things) but I have seen him control use of things such as a painkiller after surgery while still sober a couple years ago. I do agree with Anna in that some people's circumstances change and they are able to have a different relationship with alcohol/drugs. Maybe I will start drinking when I'm 80 hehe 
But seriously, it is a HUGE risk to take to try and moderate ones consumption after already having had a disastrous relationship with it. And I never drank hard liquor...the few times I did I puked my guts out (sorry so vivid) and beer? If I had a 12 pack here rt now I wouldn't have any desire to touch it. BUT, put some white wine in front of me and I tell you I can make some of my demons come out pretty quickly. We are all different and who knows the whys and even the hows of addiction (not everything is black and white). Even the best forms of treatment don't always work. I believe it really has a lot to do with choice---do I want to live this way or that? and then set up support systems accordingly. Thanks again SR friends, you all rock ((hugs))
But seriously, it is a HUGE risk to take to try and moderate ones consumption after already having had a disastrous relationship with it. And I never drank hard liquor...the few times I did I puked my guts out (sorry so vivid) and beer? If I had a 12 pack here rt now I wouldn't have any desire to touch it. BUT, put some white wine in front of me and I tell you I can make some of my demons come out pretty quickly. We are all different and who knows the whys and even the hows of addiction (not everything is black and white). Even the best forms of treatment don't always work. I believe it really has a lot to do with choice---do I want to live this way or that? and then set up support systems accordingly. Thanks again SR friends, you all rock ((hugs))
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by langkah 
Know a guy who wanted to prove everyone wrong who had said he couldn't control his drinking and did that for almost a year and a half before falling off the usual cliff.
dopeless hope fiend
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Here. Now.
Posts: 1,021
the disease of addiction had me doing things I didn't want to but could not stop. it had me deluded and isolated. it gave me liver damage and caused avascular necrosis in my hip, requiring a hip replacement at age 34. it forced me steal, lie, cheat, and manipulate to satisfy its never ending thirst. it had me risking the lives of innocent people driving around in a drunken stupor. it had me committing a series of crimes that culminated in a prison sentence. it had me stealing narcotics from my sick grandmother, mother, and dog. it had me desperate, afraid, and wanting to die.
but aside from all that yeah its just a term.
but aside from all that yeah its just a term.
01/28/2017
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 74
i just finished trying the moderation thing. i managed to make it work.......for about a year. i found that i was kidding myself, and even if i had managed to keep things under control for so long in the end the addiction started taking over again. did i go right back to where i left off? no, not even close. but i truly believe that if i don't stop now, it will get to that point eventually.
that said, i have known people who had severe drinking problems and years later be able to drink normally. my grandmother is one of those people. my dad had a rocky childhood, with an abusive stepdad and a mother who drank to cope. she is in her 80s now, and as long as i have known her i have never seen the alcoholic in her. she would always have 1-2 glasses of wine at family dinners and be fine. she's been sober for the last year though, not because drinking got out of control but because she feels healthier at her age without the booze.
i'm sure i used her as an example and excuse to try out the whole moderation thing. i'm on day 1 right now and i'm looking forward to some sobriety again.
that said, i have known people who had severe drinking problems and years later be able to drink normally. my grandmother is one of those people. my dad had a rocky childhood, with an abusive stepdad and a mother who drank to cope. she is in her 80s now, and as long as i have known her i have never seen the alcoholic in her. she would always have 1-2 glasses of wine at family dinners and be fine. she's been sober for the last year though, not because drinking got out of control but because she feels healthier at her age without the booze.
i'm sure i used her as an example and excuse to try out the whole moderation thing. i'm on day 1 right now and i'm looking forward to some sobriety again.
instant
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Australia
Posts: 5,711
The issue is though who of us wants just one or two then done. Often people seem to confuse moderation with retaining the right to get intoxicated infrequently . From what I have observed of normal people they stop drinking at a place I was just getting a taste for it, and get a run on.
In my periods of moderation I tried to work out when the urges would be triggered. I found if I drank 375mls of 4% beer over one hour I would be OK. When it boils down to it why bother?
In my periods of moderation I tried to work out when the urges would be triggered. I found if I drank 375mls of 4% beer over one hour I would be OK. When it boils down to it why bother?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 651
I wonder why being able to "drink normally" is such a big deal? Some people can't eat shellfish. Do they obsess over being able two eat one or two oysters?
One or two would be torture to me anyway....why the **** would I want one or two? I've never even understood the idea of alcohol moderation....what's the point? I damn sure wouldn't want to take the chance of falling back in that hell hole for "one or two" beers!
One or two would be torture to me anyway....why the **** would I want one or two? I've never even understood the idea of alcohol moderation....what's the point? I damn sure wouldn't want to take the chance of falling back in that hell hole for "one or two" beers!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by jv369
i just finished trying the moderation thing. i managed to make it work.......for about a year. i found that i was kidding myself, and even if i had managed to keep things under control for so long in the end the addiction started taking over again. did i go right back to where i left off? no, not even close. but i truly believe that if i don't stop now, it will get to that point eventually.
that said, i have known people who had severe drinking problems and years later be able to drink normally. my grandmother is one of those people. my dad had a rocky childhood, with an abusive stepdad and a mother who drank to cope. she is in her 80s now, and as long as i have known her i have never seen the alcoholic in her. she would always have 1-2 glasses of wine at family dinners and be fine. she's been sober for the last year though, not because drinking got out of control but because she feels healthier at her age without the booze.
i'm sure i used her as an example and excuse to try out the whole moderation thing. i'm on day 1 right now and i'm looking forward to some sobriety again.
that said, i have known people who had severe drinking problems and years later be able to drink normally. my grandmother is one of those people. my dad had a rocky childhood, with an abusive stepdad and a mother who drank to cope. she is in her 80s now, and as long as i have known her i have never seen the alcoholic in her. she would always have 1-2 glasses of wine at family dinners and be fine. she's been sober for the last year though, not because drinking got out of control but because she feels healthier at her age without the booze.
i'm sure i used her as an example and excuse to try out the whole moderation thing. i'm on day 1 right now and i'm looking forward to some sobriety again.
Sorry to hear she set the example for you...I think I'm going to stay on the path that I'm on...
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 45
I'm new to recovery, but the big book states there is a difference between a real alcoholic and a hard drinker. maybe he is/was just a hard drinker?
I've quit for 6 months or so, and when i got back to drinking it was 4-5 beers at first, then a month later 10-15 plus shots every night. only time will tell if he's a real alcoholic or not!
I've quit for 6 months or so, and when i got back to drinking it was 4-5 beers at first, then a month later 10-15 plus shots every night. only time will tell if he's a real alcoholic or not!
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