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Scared of AA meetings, am I a AA meeting snob???

Old 02-16-2012, 01:51 PM
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Scared of AA meetings, am I a AA meeting snob???

Ok, I hope no one thinks I am too snotty for saying this, if you knew my current state, you would know that is definetly NOT the case. However, I want to start going to AA meetings, but it is so overwhelming the choices that are out there, it confuses and scares me. With that said, I have been looking into nicer area's that hold AA meetings, dare I say I feel I need to be around hardworking middle class people like myself? That sounds terrible I know as alcoholism is a disease and class shouldn't matter. I am worried and scared, there is a meeting in the small town I live in, but don't wanna go to that one because I don't want anyone knowing this about me right now.....UGH! When I pull up meetings there are so many different kinds, some are opened, some are closed, some are big book,some are for beginners, some are this, that and everything else in between! Waaahhhhhhhhhhh, I really hate this!!! Woe is Meeeeeeee.......LOL!
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Old 02-16-2012, 02:01 PM
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I don't think anybody walks into their first AA meeting because their life is at the top of their game.....Everybody is scared...For me...Ashamed...Terrified...Is probably a better word. Open meeting. You don't have to be a member of AA...You can bring a friend if you want....Closed...Members only...How to become a member....Have an honest desire to quit drinking.....Big Book...Goes through the book...Step meeting...Usually a step every meeting...It varies...Beginners....Might be good for you...Mens...Womens...They're all good. The fear will be gone when you walk out out of the meeting...All I felt was hope...I didn't have much when I went in....All you have to do is sit and listen...Talk to some people before and after..Tell them you are new...They'll take care of you...They are people just like you and me. Alkies.
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Old 02-16-2012, 02:01 PM
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Everyone is scared at first. The first thing to do is calm down and breathe. And don't worry about seeing someone you know at a meeting, because they are there for the very same reason you are and they will keep your secret just as much as they want you to keep theirs. that is why it is ANONYMOUS! What happens in those rooms stays in those rooms.

For your first meeting I would suggest an open meeting, because those are for people who aren't sure if they have a problem or not, or just people in general who are interested in the fellowship. Also you can take someone with you to an open meeting for support, such as a spouse or partner. I took my boyfriend with me to my first open meeting and after that I was okay going alone to other types of meetings.

Don't let everything overwhelm you. I know there is a lot of things to choose from and such, but just take it one day at a time. Any meeting is a good meeting! So just pick one and get there.
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Old 02-16-2012, 02:08 PM
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I'm not an AA person, but I think you should do whatever works for you in your recovery.
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Old 02-16-2012, 02:09 PM
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Why not be as comfortable as possible? Finding any type of crowd in AA shouldn't be too hard.
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Old 02-16-2012, 02:12 PM
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Smile

It dosen't sound snotty of you at all. It just sounds honest, dont worry about it, its okay to be wondering what is what with different meetings. You have really good suggestions above from Flyer and Sapling and not much more for me to add. Perhaps phone the local AA Inter-group or any AA local number and just chat with the member and ask first hand about different meetings in your area of choice where ever that may be, it dosen't matter its really just up to you.

Good luck!
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Old 02-16-2012, 02:22 PM
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Wouldn't it be cool if you did go and found
someone you knew, maybe in HS, or someone
you've seen in church or the grocery store?

To know they are there at a meeting for a
reason, in fact, the same reason as you and I?

To know you can walk up to them or them to
you and smile and say, hey Ive seen you in HS
and u reply, yes and i remember you too.

You start up a conversation, go for coffee, begin
sharing your story of why you and they are at
a recovery meeting because you both have some-
thing in common. An addiction to drugs or alcohol.

When i began AA 21 yrs ago, I didnt know anyone
personally. Then when i went to my first AA convention,
I saw several people from my hometown and my
first job. Never in my wildest dreams who'd i'd think
we had the same thing in common. And to know our
paths were meant to cross.

Anonymous part of the program stands for what you
hear or who you see in meetings stays there. How
comforting is that?

I went to a zillion meetings for 7 yrs till i relocated
and listened and absorbed all i could comprehend
of what recovery was all about and how those with
many yrs. sobriety continue to stay sober or clean
a day at a time for as long as they have.

I went to those meetings not for the social aspect
of it but rather for the support of the fellowship to
help me within my little family.

People knew i was married and there was no hitting
on me, but rather respect and they were there to guide
me along each day i went helping me stay sober.

In meetings I saw a sign that said Responsibility. I am
responsible for me and my recovery and it's up to me,
to pass on the knowledge of recovery to others still
struggling with addiction.

That is what im doing today and grateful that AA was
available to me 21 yrs ago or I would surely be dead
by now.
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Old 02-16-2012, 02:24 PM
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Somebody recommended the meeting I go to every morning...Said it was a Blue Collar meeting...I checked it out...It's right down the street from a homless shelter...Not bums...Just people that have drank or drugged themselves out of everthing they had...So we have from 40 to 60 people every morning...Half from there and half middle class working people with some long standing sobriety.....Always have new people coming and going...Makes for some fantastic meetings...Find one you like and make it your homegroup...Makes you part of something. I made that my homegroup on my second day there. Shop around...You'll know the one you like.
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Old 02-16-2012, 02:30 PM
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Yes, it IS scary, that is normal. I think it's called wandering out of our comfort zone? And from what I gather, we have to move out of that comfort zone in order to change.
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Old 02-16-2012, 02:36 PM
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None of us have class at an AA meeting. lol
Seriously, we're all there to stay stopped from drinking.
Get to any meeting and just sit and listen. Or start with listening to speakers online.
You aren't alone anymore!
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Old 02-16-2012, 02:41 PM
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I'm ashamed to say, I've left many a bar in a very inebriated state back in the day. I can say, I've never been ashamed to walk out of an AA meeting with my held held high for being sober.
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Old 02-16-2012, 03:07 PM
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I think you will be surprised at how much in common you have with people from different walks of life. I know I feel a bond with people that have the same disease as I do.
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Old 02-16-2012, 03:27 PM
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I agree, my guess is you'll probably feel quite a bit in common with whoever's there.

Meetings do vary quite a bit in quality though, so it's worth "shopping around" to find one that makes you feel at home.
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Old 02-16-2012, 03:28 PM
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I agree, my guess is you'll probably feel quite a bit in common with whoever's there.

Meetings do vary quite a bit in quality though, so it's worth "shopping around" to find one that makes you feel at home.
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Old 02-16-2012, 03:42 PM
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Wish I could add something but I'm guessing you get the picture. Everyone there has gone through the first meeting jitters. May I suggest an Open Meeting to start with? Good luck.
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Old 02-16-2012, 04:20 PM
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Hey there fellow Ohioian

I am up in Cleveland and been in AA here now since June. Love it wouldnt change going to that first meeting.
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Old 02-16-2012, 04:23 PM
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What interested me about AA was a feeling that there was a common bond which transcended all class differences, the brute fact that addiction knows no differences, the terrifying slavery brought about by chemistry simply does not care And so, like passengers in a lifeboat, saved from disaster, at least for the immediate future (hours, days, weeks, months, years or even a lifetime) the normal differences in life simply disappear. When you have seen their eyes and they have seen yours, you know that they have been where you have been their hands reach out to help or just to say that they are glad you've come. Here on this website it's the same way. We're glad you've posted your concerns. Do stick around and- good luck.

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Old 02-16-2012, 04:34 PM
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Thank you so much everyone! I can't believe this is happening to me!
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Old 02-16-2012, 04:43 PM
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Wai till you go to a meeting...It's even better.
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Old 02-16-2012, 04:47 PM
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Better as in good, or OH GOD!!
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