canguy

Pangur,
Tomorrow would have been my son, Ben's, first birthday. His mother isn't here, I've cleaned the house so I don't have to find her hair anywhere. Alcohol numbs me to all of this. I have never felt so much loss, so much emotional isolation. Our son is dead. After he died people, well meaning, sent us flowers. We had the watch them die too...

I just have to shut the eff up and wear it. This is how it is. Hey, there's a line in the Clash record....."nembutal numbs it all, But I prefer alcohol".
Just gotta accept it as it is.

G'nite all and thanks.

canguy

Hi Pangur,

Don't beat yourself up too much, yeah? Both of us seem to be on here, still drinking, amoung all the crazy brave people proudly announcing their third or fourth day soba. The reason we're here is that we want to get off this sht but personal circumstances make it like impossible @this moment. Losing both parents together...can't imagine that. How did you lose your baby? We're drinking to blot it. Hey, maybe we try a double act of sobriety in front of all these people if we've got all this in common? Love to you, man

instant

Is there any danger in waiting for a good time to stop? The time was never right for me, and stuff was piling up- no real disasters ....yet............but I could see them coming

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Sorry to here about what is going on with you. Time heals all. In time you will get over this hard time with or with out alcohol. Don't be confused about alcohol is a drug. Once I crossed that line into addiction there was no coming back for me. I can't even count the times I wanted to quit or or tried to quit. I tried to quit for a very long time with no good luck. I was in and out of the program sense 1988. I could just not get it and kept going back out. Today things are different for me. Come June I will be clean and sober for 7 years. I found a new way of life and a new way to live. Love and Respect. logo