violet82

Hi, I'm new here, and I need some help, please.

I started using xanax two months ago. I got it at first from a co-worker who said "Here, take this, it will help you sleep." (I'd been going through a lot, and having bad anxiety and insomnia). Well, needless to say, I slept like a baby that first night. So I asked for more. I've been using about .5 mg every night and sometimes .25mg during the day.

Over the past two months, my anxiety has worsened, I've not been able to eat, have had nausea, vomiting, and extreme insomnia (not sleeping for 3 days sometimes, my dose is not helping me sleep anymore). I didn't know about the extreme addictive qualities of the drug and I am REGRETTING my decision to ever ever take it. Worst move of my life. I realize after finally doing research on the drug that what I've been going through during the day are withdrawal symptoms. It's just getting worse and worse.

I've set up an appointment to talk with drug counselor at my local hospital, and, hopefully they will be able to set up some sort of tapering program for me. I know that I haven't been on these that long, and that my dose is fairly minimal, but even that has had such a drastic effect on me!! I've lost 6lbs over the past two months. I only weighed 98 lbs to begin with...I'm 5'4, always been very skinny. I can't eat anything, when I do try, I gag and almost throw up. I'm scared. I'm scared of these drugs, I'm scared of myself.

Has anyone out there had a similar experience with these drugs? Has anyone taken them for only about two months and experienced such severe symptoms? Can you tell me what I should expect from coming off them, and how long it might take to recover from two months of use? Is a hospital the place to go for help? I don't have a regular doc. I'm just so overwhelmed....thank you for any help.

ChrisM

Let me just say, last year I started taking Xanax prescribed by my doctor to help taper me off of another medication. First of all, you must remember that Xanax is a fast acting anti-anxiety med, which means it has a short half life - rapid onset, followed by withdrawal symptoms, anxiety often being at the top of the list.

The incredible danger with this drug, is that not only is the user inclined to take *more* in order to feel the relief felt the first time you took it, but it also has a high potential for "blackouts". I was prescribed the drug last May, and by the middle of July, I'd been in a blackout for four weeks, having started with 0.5mg once per day, to taking a total of (25) 1mg tablets in a 24-hour period, all because I couldn't remember when I'd taken it last nor how much I'd taken.

Certainly not trying to scare you -- just don't want to see anyone else potentially go through even a fraction of what I did...it was almost fatal

-Chris

jocata

Hey violet. Welcome to SR, you will get lots of support here. Keep reading and posting often, so we can support you and see how you are doing.

I abused xanax off and on for about a year. I would take anywhere from 5-10 mg a day. I finally just quit cold turkey. All the symptoms you listed above I had as well. The anxiety and insomnia were the worst for me. I did lose my appetite somewhat, but I didn't lose much weight. Depression was also a big one for me.

It's good that you are talking to a professional about it. Withdrawals from xanax can be very dangerouse, even deadly. Talk with your doc also if you have too.

Stay with us, you will get alot of love here.

God bless.

Threshold

Hi violet, and welcome.

You are off to a great start. I hope you address the anxiety issues with a dr, and then a therapist. There are non narc medical options as well as lots of various behavioral methods of dealing with anxiety.

I truly find anxiety the worst feeling of all. It is the one that led directly to my substance abuse. I am using other options now to address it and am doing much much better.

It's nice to have you on the forum.

GirlFromCO

Hi Violet, and welcome to SR.

Do you think that what you've been going through might have more to do with your anxiety than with the xanax itself? Xanax of course does have potential for abuse, but you're not taking very much of it, honestly, and not for a very long time either. My humble, non-physician best guess is that it's your anxiety worsening, not the xanax itself that is causing problems. Is there any way you can get in to see a doctor about your anxiety? Dee has some helpful links to options for people without health insurance if that's an issue.

violet82

Thank you all for your responses. It makes me feel better to know that I'm not alone in this.

I know what I've been taking is a very small dose, for a very short amount of time comparatively to some. I've been looking around the internet and this forum at various stories of others dealing with xanax withdrawal. Most of them have come off much higher doses and from years of using it. I've had a lot of questions floating around in my head about what I've been going through. (Is this really the xanax or is it ME? Am I just being paranoid about addiction/withdrawal from a drug and that's whats feeding the frenzy? Is it all psychological?? Can I just quit tomorrow and be fine?) The answer to all those questions is totally unknown for me, and I feel like it almost impossible for me to tell what is the drug and what is my own anxiety. However, I've never never gone through any kind of anxiety like this before. I've had anxiety, for sure, but this is waaaaay farther than its ever gone. I have an appointment with a counselor tomorrow, and I pray that he/she will have some insight and knowledge to help pull me out of this hole.

Thank you again for all your thoughts. Mine are with you as well.