GalFriday

I'm going to my 2nd N/A meeting tomorrow. I am not bashing it at all, and I'm trying hard to have an open mind about it. BUT....

#1) I'm not convinced that it is what I want to do, but I am going again mainly because those of you in-the-know suggest it so adamantly, so there must be something to it.

#2)Working the steps seems like a huge "to-do list" when I already have my plate full.

#3) I am not comfortable talking (especially one on one) to a stranger about my personal problems and secrets.

So do I really need to get a sponsor at this point? Is it really important enough that I need to just grit my teeth against my own unwillingness and do it anyway? I would appreciate some opinions from those who have been there, done that.

Sapling

How bad do you want to quit drinking and drugs for good and live life with power, peace, happiness and a sense of direction in it?

Sapling

Oh...A sponsor is someone that will guide you through the steps from the book...

UofI2008

I had the same feelings and ended up not choosing to continue the AA/NA route. It's ok to not like certain programs and there are many ways to get sober. No way is the right way.

I would give NA your best shot. Get a sponsor, work the steps etc. A sponsor is someone that you pick from in the rooms to show you how to work the steps and live the program. If it ends up that program isn't a right fit for you then do something else. Remember the only thing that really matters is that you don't pick up, EVER.

UofI2008

Look for a woman in the program that has the kind of sobriety that you want. Someone who preferably has several years in the program, has worked all the steps, and truly lives the program.

Ask around at meetings for those who are available for sponsership. Talk to a chairperson at the meeting if they know who is available. People in the meetings will be more than happy to guide you in the right direction. Go to a women's only meeting and get to know the people in there, listen to them speak.

I found my sponser at a meeting that appointed temporary sponsers. He and I got to know each other, and he is my sponser today.


I stole this from another thread btw.

Dee74

I'm not in a 12 step programme but I think UofI has some great advice

D

Sapling

And he's honest enough to admit that he stole it....

jocata

That would be my post UofI.
Gal, this is what I posted in an earlier thread you had started asking how to choose a sponser. This is what I was told to do.

Good luck and God bless.

GalFriday

Thanks!

Anna

I hope you find something that works for you.

Threshold

#1..the door swings both ways you are free to come and go as you see fit. If nothing else you meet some people in recovery and get some ideas and support until you choose another program.

#2...The 12 steps are a road to freedom. A path that many have taken to recover. If you prefer to choose another route that's fine, but whichever road you take some effort is going to be involved. You will have to schedule time and put effort into recovering.

#3...Neither was I. So I found someone I was comfortable with before I went to that depth. I also found that I redefined what "secret" was. When I got into NA, there was pretty much nothing those people hadn't seen, heard or done themselves, so it put my stuff into perspective.

A sponsor is someone to help you go through the steps. If you aren't ready to do that, you don't need a sponsor yet. I'd just go to some more meetings...and try one's in different times and places if you have that option. All meetings are not equal.

UofI2008

Totally agree. No matter what you do it is going to take some work. None of this is easy at all.

Luckyv2

For one there is no time limit on anything. One of the first things I remember hearing was, go to 6 meetings and if you don't like what you are getting than by all means you don't have to continue.

I am not sure if I even had a sponsor after the first month or so. I do remember they just kept saying "Keep Coming Back" which I did. You have already basically admitted that you are Powerless over you addiction or you sure wouldn't have even gone to the 1st meeting.

One of my best friends on the Internet told me the last time to do a time-line. Now all of this time in the Program none of my Sponsors here even mentioned anything of the sort, cause it isn't really in the Program. Maybe she will see this thread here and you can hook up with Her. She is a very awesome Lady and she sure will tell you like it is as well LOL

So the time line consisted of I think it was three things.

Starting from the first time you used to the last write down

1. What you used
2. When you used it
3. What happened
4. And what were the consequences of the use.

Now you do this from the very first time you used to the last time. And yeah it takes time, but there is not a rush in recovery we each do it Just For Today