I don't label others issues either, but I found your comment interesting. You said you go to sleep at 3 or 4am on weekends and sleep 8 - 10 hours. That has you getting up around Noon or later. Do you think your children might enjoy spending more time with you on the weekends?

I also have a problem with sleeping patterns since childhood that is seperate from alcohol consumption. It's another issue I'm trying to address as well. I take care of my kids all week so we have plenty of good time together. This is besides the point of myself addressing my drinking issue, though.

I also have a problem with sleeping patterns since childhood that is seperate from alcohol consumption. It's another issue I'm trying to address as well. I take care of my kids all week so we have plenty of good time together. This is besides the point of myself addressing my drinking issue, though.

Sleep issues from childhood, yup!

Last night I heard a speaker tape. He said, "What makes me an alcoholic is how I feel before I drink and how I feel after I drink; I drank to change how I felt."

Stay stopped, your sleep patterns will be better/healthy.

Have you considered AA? The steps, specifically 4-7, changed everything negative in my life to a positive. No fear or anxiety, sleep is great, you name it!

you don't need to drink daily, drink during the morning, drink before 10, 9, 8, 7, 6 pm or have negative consequences to drink alcoholically. And try early exercise and earlier bedtime to address sleep patterns, your family needs you awake! Get up at the same time every day, eat healthy foods, no tv/computer/cell phone 1 hour before sleep....sleep problems have their own set of solutions. For me, it was living with fears & anxiety that didn't let me sleep well.

The way I sleep is seperate from drinking alcohol. It's something that I've struggled with from my early teens. There were a few instances in the past 2 years where I went several months without drinking and it had no bearing on the way I slept, it's a different problem that I also feel I need to face. Don't want to sound like I'm in denial or anything as I'm open to all input. But seeing as I'm the person who knows me best , the way i drink and the way I sleep are not related. Quitting drinking altogether will not change the way and times I sleep.

Bool...something brought you to this question. Something about your drinking is bothering you. Don't look to others to validate or not. Examine deeply and honestly.

Hi, I don't know if this helps you, but, I have a sleep disorder (adult night terrors) and have irregular sleeping problems that are not only caused by the disorder but also exacerbate it! It's like a cyclical problem. To me I find that it is related to my drinking, and my drinking is related to it, because I am one person and everything in my life is related to everything else, if that makes sense. I have had the night terrors since I was 12 years old, and didn't drink until I was 18, so, clearly I'm not saying that I have night terrors because I drink, or I drink because I have night terrors. But my disorder is caused by anxiety/stress and my reaction to it... it is part of my personality and who I am/ how I deal with life. I feel similar things about my drinking problem. So addressing all of it is critical for me, and looking at it as an entire package rather than separate issues. I have found that I have less anxiety/stress, and a better reaction to it, when I don't drink and when I work a recovery program. Also I need to take action to correct my sleep issues to the best of my ability, just like I need to take action to correct my drinking problem. To me the same concepts apply to every issue, so that I can become a better person. Best wishes.

Your story sounds very familiar to me. Starting in my mid twenties, for the next 10 years I drank a LOT of beer, almost every weekend. But I never craved alcohol during the week, if I had my car, was able to drink 3-4 beers and stop - and maybe out of 1,000 times getting drunk, there were half dozen that I did or said something I regretted, but no major consequences; useless every Monday, but otherwise no complaints.

When I hit 35, my health started to decline. My liver enzymes were elevated, and cholesterol high. After six months abstaining, blood tests back to normal -but doctor advised if I went back to my weekend binges, my liver was very much at risk. So I cut back to once a month. But now, my hangovers lasted until Tuesday, and instead of embarrasing myself once out of every 150 times I drank, it was more like once out of every three times. So in 2011, decided to cut it back to five times for the year. It didn't go all that well. Now my hangovers were lasting until Wednesday or Thursday, and I regretted my actions four out of the five times. Was this simply a result of getting older, or was alcohol was getting a tighter grip on me, the less I used it; the opposite of what I hoped for? Not sure, but I didn't want to find out, and decided I won't be getting drunk in 2012.

reason I share this is that I know when you read some of the stories here, about the difficulties people are facing, it might make you think you're in better shape than you actually are. I have an older brother in AA, and a couple friends who I've seen really struggle with addiction. I think I've looked at them in the past, and thought, oh, lucky me, since I'm not that bad, I must have no problem. But now I think perhaps I was kidding myself the whole time.

What we're trying to say is it's not just about quitting drinking-- the physical act of drinking-- it's about addressing why you have sleep problems and changing certain aspects of your personality/reactions to life for the better, and taking action... all of which you need to stop drinking to be able to do. Believe me, I have been there... I have tried not drinking alcohol, not drinking caffeine, etc. for periods of time and always still had night terrors. To some extent I will probably always have night terrors. However, they are much improved when I not only stayed stopped from drinking, but also look at/work on myself to overcome the issues that caused me to drink AND that caused me to have sleep problems. Just give it a try, it can't hurt, right? Stay stopped from drinking AND work a program of recovery, which means commitment and action, and see if your sleep problems improve. :) Since it's something you haven't tried before in this capacity, it just might work!! It sure has for me so far.

This is great practical advice. I recently saw a sleep specialist and underwent a sleep study and was told all of this same stuff. I had been told it in the past but never really listened to it. I had to realize it was so bad off that I need to take consistent action, and be committed to it and make it a priority in my life, or things would never change. Just like my drinking issues, that, like my sleeping issues, are tied to my emotional/psychological issues. It really is all related. Our fears and anxieties contribute to our quality of sleep. We need to be committed to combatting everything that plagues us. You can do it!!

I could quit drinking tomorrow and will still be sleeping irregular hours 10 years from now - they're two different issues with me. This much I know.

But I *do* agree that if I ever want to get a normal full-time sleeping pattern, that I'd have to give up alcohol on weekends, because alcohol on weekends makes me sleep poorly. So yes, in order to live a normal life with normal sleep, my alcohol consumption must either be reduced on each occasion or stop altogether.

That said - I'm on these forums to concentrate on my drinking, not my sleeping.

After reading everyone's helpful responses here, I'm fully positive that I do have a drinking problem in some shape or form.

I realize this by seeing that I go all week without even thinking of beer. So why is it that on the weekend I drink these quantities of alcohol? It's like a jeckyl/hyde thing for me... a person who's totally normal during the week but then when there's free time on Fri/Sat I'm a person who's downing an 18-pack of liquor. It's like 2 different "me's".

I think back to all the times I've returned several cases of empty beer bottles.. I tend to wait several months to return them and by that time I'm returning 5 or 6 empty cases.. may not seem like a lot over that stretch but it's several hundred cans and bottles... all consumed within 60 days... it's too much, which means I'm drinking too much.

I can sugar-coat it all with the "only on weekends", "I don't crave it", "I'm not dependent on it" (which are all true), but the fact of the matter is that I am drinking up to 18-20 beer per weekend regardless of my excuse and I think that is too much to be drinking by myself.

I'm also thinking about my health and it kind of scares me to find out about the really bad consequences. I reckon I'm okay now, because I feel no physical problems, but if I keep up this behavior for another 10 years who knows, I might be in trouble. (I'm mid 30s).

From here, my first step will be to try and reduce the amount I'm drinking per weekend and see where this takes me.

There was a time I drank like that. Many years later I was using the same logic on a very different kind of drinking. Try not drinking for a couple of weeks and see what happens

been there done that many many times. Still do that. In the summer time especially, with my work, I'll go 3, 4, 5 weeks without a single beer and it doesn't phase me. The same will happen this coming summer. In a few weeks, I have work on consecutive weekends, which means I'll be going 3 weeks without drinking a beer. And it won't be a problem.

My concern is that when I do have 'free' weekends, that I'll most likely drink in the evenings, so long as there isn't an obligation early the next day. It's like if I drink 8 cans of Coke in one evening... I know it's too much and it's bad for me. Same with beer. There's no logical reason that I should be drinking 8 beer in one night.

I realize I'm exhibiting odd symptoms of alcoholism, but they're in me to some degree, and it's why I've began to think about it. I guess the older I get, the more I look back on... and there are literally hundreds of weekends gone by that I drank... started out in night clubs, then with the neighbors, and now on my own. The weekend pattern has never changed, not even once, but the pattern is there, so I'm taking a closer look at it.

To be honest, it's why I've always wondered if I have a problem... I'm not showing signs of dependance and the days and times I drink are restrictive and I don't have any urge to change those times... so why then am I allocating two evenings a week to do this? Sure it may not be interfering with my life in any major way, but the fact remains that I am drinking an 18 pack a weekend and I see this every time I go to the beer store and return empties. This is when I realize what I've been doing all these years. Why don't I just relax on a Friday/Saturday night, watch a bit of TV/do a few projects then go to bed?

I'm in the middle ground and yes, confused. But my deep gut instinct says there's a problem here to some degree.



...Put it this way:

if someone smokes cigarettes only on weekends... are they an addicted smoker and at risk as any other full time smoker?

update

the past two weekends in a row, I've limited my alcohol consumption to 6 beer on Friday night and 8 on Saturday night.

Anything over 8 beer for me in one night causes me to reach the 'regret' stage, where I wake up the next day and say yep, I think I drank too much again last night. Saturday nights would start after the kids are in bed (9pm or so, and go until 3-ish.)

Anyhow, the way I did this was to first tell myself that "it is 6 beer tonight and that's all". Second would be for me to open the beer case, but 6 beer in the fridge, then put away the rest of the case on the shelf.

It's worked fine, and after 6 beer, I'm tired and have no desire for any more. I'm able to say, 'well, I could drink more, but what's the point.. I'm going to feel like I'm 'medicated' instead of 'buzzed', so 6 is it'. It's worked well and the next day I feel no effects whatsoever.

As for saturday nights, I allow myself 8, using the same parameters as friday nights. It has also worked fine.

I also noticed that after the first weekend of limiting my drinking, that I felt quite a bit more happy during the week, for whatever reason. Kind of like an excitement of youth returning. I don't know why, but was it related to slowing down my drinking. Or maybe it was just a happy week. I'll know this coming week after I've limited my alcohol intake two weekends in a row.

In all honesty, it seems the difference of just 2 beer in one night seems to make quite a difference for me the next day and how I feel during the week. For example, if I drink 8 over a spread out time (6 or 7 hours), I feel fine the next day and into the week. If I guzzle those beer in 3 or 4 hours then it hits me a lot harder. So the difference between drinking say, 7 beer or 9 beer makes a huge difference on me. 7 beer and I'm good, but if I hit 9, I risk feeling more like sh*t the next day and into my work week. I wonder why just 2 drinks can be the 'teeter-totter' for me.

I'm learning to realize that fine line between drinking the first set of beer and feeling the buzz or exceeding that amount and starting to feel like I'm becoming 'medicated'. Thankfully at that medicated stage I realize that the "party" is over for the night and it's time to stop

sounds like a lot of work to me Bool - but I'm glad you feel it's working for you :)

D

try limiting the amount of alcohol consumption by putting a certain amount in the fridge and putting the rest away, like in the closet, in the garage, etc. What's ijn the fridge is what I get for the night. 6, 8 beer, whatever.

If i find that after what's in the fridge is finished that I sneak out to the shed to grab another 2, then I know I have a problem creeping in.

Because if there's 8 in the fridge, that means I told myself at the start of the night that 8 will be all for this evening- so have fun. But if i went out and brought in 2 more beer, then I broke my own rules for the night and I have a problem. I want this to work.

That sounds exhausting.. we all find our own path :)

what's exhausting about it.. going out to the shed to get more beer? :gaah

I believe Flutter was referring to all of the effort you are putting into coming up with & analyzing all of your parameters & formulas to find your particular level of drinking that you are comfortable with. I get it, I was once coming up with all sorts of formulas & theories as to my drinking (like a mad scientist), I eventually proved them all wrong by coming to the conclusion I was an alcoholic and needed to stop drinking ;-)

All of the best to you :ring

Yeah...it's just a lot of focus on alcohol. Wouldn't it be nice to not have to think about it, plan, limit? If you don't drink it at all, then you don't have to do all that. How important is it?

I'd rather plan and limit and have fun with it other than abstain altogether


just being honest.


so I want to see how well I can plan and limit and follow my guidelines of control for myself.

If I can follow them, then would it be considered responsible drinking?

Only you can answer that.

Boy, is that ever the truth, Bool. Been there, done that, and know I'm not alone. Smokers would rather smoke, junkies would rather use, and alcoholics would rather drink. But people who are able to control themselves, and stick to their limits, usually don't end up at SR. And you first came here in 2006...so do you think maybe it's time to evaluate whether that's a realistic goal?

Well A for honesty & E for effect. Drinking is affecting your sleeping patterns & how you feel afterwards (in a negative way), enough so that you decided to search, sign up & post on a sober recovery forum. I think you know that this is not good for you (18 plus beers on the weekends ;-).

I'm not exactly sure what you are looking for to be honest... us to tell you that "No. you don't have a problem... go ahead & drink a case or two every weekend!" Sorry but that is not going to happen.

We are here to support you if you want it, I do also understand how difficult it can be when you are first trying to come to terms with the idea that you may have a problem.

Keep posting & keep working on your problem. You will know when you move in the right direction of a solution.

Take care & all of the best ~ NB

Getting honest about where we are at and asking for help is a wonderful thing. Placing this question here is just that i believe, in your own words you are asking for help and guess what.... we alcoholics LOVE TO HELP. So you're in the right place. No one of us can say if you are or are not an alcoholic, that glorified decision is squarely placed on your head. If you are there is a solution to a better life, if your not... have a drink on us. Good luck!

thank you everyone. Let me play this out for a while and see where it leads me now that my concern is more in my mind.

Does not matter if you drink a 24 pack of beer or 1 beer. If you feel like you have a problem with alcohol then you have your answer.

Bool, I came from an environment where alcohol was not present at all. I started drinking once in a month during business trips. Slowly, it progressed to level that I changed my job to a city where alcohol was easily available and it became daily. As all SR friends have mentioned, alcoholic or any type of drinker, does not matter. If it causes any problem at this stage or not, even a drink once in year is a problem. The reason being Alcoholism is a progressive diseases .

Bool, Please ask this one question to yourself and answer it honestly. Did you drink 8 beers , on the very 1st day, you started drinking ? Most probably, the honest answer , will tell you the truth.

[QUOTE=Bool;3239267]If I tell myself I'm not drinking this weekend, I can do it easily. But I find it a waste of time knowing that I can do it, so I just drink it. "[QUOTE]

The problem starts here. Right now, you are finding it waste of time knowing that you can do it. But please look at it this way, all your weeks ends are getting wasted in hang over. So I were you , I would rather waste time for " not drinking " , knowing that I will have lots of time saved from having no hang overs during week ends.