Innerchild

While in psych ward, I was introduced to Ativan. I refused it at first but once my anxiety increased I tried one and realized that it made me numb just like alcohol. When I told me inpatient psych I liked it because it stopped me from thinking she took me right off it. I wasnt happy because the non addictive atarax I was prescribed takes longer to kick in and doesnt give you that same feeling.

I saw an outpatient psychiatrist today and asked him if there was anything to prescribe for anxiety that works quicker and he responded that there is xanax, klonopin or ativan that is highly addictive but if I needed it he would prescribe one to me.

I thought for a minute and responded that because I used alcohol to numb my emotional pain I dont think its a good Idea as I do not want to become addicted to some kind of benzo. I almost had it right in my hand too. lol.

I just know how I am and even if Ive never had any addiction to pills I dont want to pick up another bad habit on top of the drinking I know I have a n addictive personality its all or nothing when it comes to me.

WantToHeal

You should be proud...well done!

desertsong

Often we can substitute one addiction for another. You SHOULD be proud! Good job!

Innerchild

Thank you. Ive been substituting caffeine which has made me anxiety worse. I am craving the coffee lmao

Peter G

Smart thing to do. Benzos can be the absolute worst things to come off and the easiest thing to become dependent on. Not to mention they've caused many an alcoholic to relapse back to booze, once the benzo kick gets weaker over use/abuse and time. Benzos are helpful, I guess, but only as an extremely short term solution to anxiety or acute stress overload. Long term they are nothing but horrid, evil drugs and I wouldn't wish addiction to those on my worst enemies. I've said this before, if offered a choice between being shot in the head or being whacked out on benzos again, I'd take the bullet in the head. Seriously.

I don't know if you are aware but once whacked out on benzos, there are heroine addicts who swear that withdrawal from a benzo is worse than heroine withdrawal. I can vouch for that. My worst stint in an ICU, coming off a 100+ day booze bender and close to death was nowhere near as terrifying as the protracted withdrawal from my xanax + ambien abuse. I literally spent 5 months thinking I was certifiably insane. Hands down that period of time was, for me, the worst experience of my life. It's also what drove me to become the alcoholic that I became.

So again, smart move. Nicely done.

Innerchild

Thanks Peter that is really scary and I never want to go down that road. I do have phobias like Doctors and Dentists and certain situations will put me in a full blown panic attack. Thankfully the psychiatrist recommende Cognitive Behaviorial Therapy for my phobias but I may ask him next time I see him if getting a pill or two prescribed for events like dentist, doctor visits etc and maybe prescribe only a few pills that I can take in these situations so I dont get tempted to take them on a regular basis and do not become addicted to them. I believe if extreme situations they can be effective but definetly not something you want to pop every day.

Threshold

awesome job of turning down the little white nightmares!

There are non narc options to help with panic/anxiety. Ask your dr about those if you feel you need something. They are normally Rx'd for blood pressure but can also help with panic.

Threshold

awesome job of turning down the little white nightmares!

There are non narc options to help with panic/anxiety. Ask your dr about those if you feel you need something. They are normally Rx'd for blood pressure but can also help with panic.

Impurrfect

(((innerchild))) - GREAT!! FWIW, I have a friend who is in recovery for opiates. She also has "white coat syndrome" - any time she sees a dentist (moreso than her doctor) she gets anxious, blood pressure goes up, etc. Her dr. has given her a benzo, but only a few pills and only when she has a dentist appt.

I'm really proud of you for recognizing what the pills made you feel like and realizing that it was not a good thing For me, anything that changes my mood is something I need to be wary of.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

quitforme79

That's awesome inner child!! Way to go in taking care of yourself

lisa29

Good for you! That was a very responsible move and is a great step in the right direction!

sissy07

Innerchild,

You should be proud of yourself! You did yourself a big favor.

jocata

That's the way to do it innerchild! I took xanax for quite awhile, and they are no fun to stop indeed.

Give yourself a pat on the back! That's huge!

God bless.

Innerchild

Awe thanks guys. I am on Busiprone for anxiety and take as needed I am on Atarax which is in the antihistimine category. They make you retty drowsy but they arent addictive and dont make you feel like you are on something. Just trying to be responsible because thinking that I was almost physically addicted to alcohol was pretty scary and was a big wake up call.

I took a three hour nap before and usually if I nap during the day its because I passed out bc of alcohol. I woke up feeling grateful I wasnt drunk and feeling like crap. Not drinking really makes you feel grateful for the small things in life.

handsome11208

Kudos to u....