Trying something different.
 

I am a binge drinker. I get drunk every Saturday night and sometimes I get drunk on Friday as well. I typically have a 12 pack of beer, maybe a little liquor and a smoke some Black and Mild Cigars. It's a disgusting habit...both the binge drinking and the smoking. It is by far the worst thing I do. Fortunately, nothing really bad has happened as a result of any of this...it's just a terrible habit that has been going on for about 7 years. I do this all by myself...not at parties. This habit absolutely has got to go. This is especially true when I consider the fact that I never smoke unless I have at least 4-5 drinks in me. I am concerned about my health and safety...that's reason I consider it a problem. The smoking has to go (I've read articles...people who smoke 1/2 pack of cigarettes per week have similar blood vessel damage as those who smoke a pack a day). The binge drinking also has to go.

I have tried to just moderate my drinking, but I find that that doesn't work. I have also tried labeling myself as an alcoholic and vowing to never drink again. When I do that, I just feel angry that I am an alcoholic (whatever that means) and feel sorry for myself and then my thinking turns obsessively towards alcohol. I think it's the forbidden fruit syndrome kicking in. So just resolving to cut down drinking or cut out drinking doesn't seem to work for me.

What I have noticed about myself is that I never get drunk before I have work the next day. So at least I have my priorities straight about that. The reason I drink on the weekend is because I clearly have nothing better to do. It's just boredom. I have no wife/girlfriend or kids that I need to be sober for...I am an Agnostic/Atheist so I don't need to be sober for church. I just have nothing going on on the weekends. I drink to cope with boredom.

If I resolve to "never drink again" the little voice in my head says "oh come on...you can't be serious." It basically drives me nuts. That's no way to live. I still believe in having fun. I have no moral problems with getting drunk or smoking pot... victimless crimes. The only reason it's a problem for me is that I am concerned about the long term health risks and immediate safety. Honestly I'd have pot all the time in vaporized/eaten (not cancerous) form because I like having fun and the health risks seem minute enough that I believe that the risk is worth it for me personally...but obviously the access to it is inconsistent and possible drug testing from work makes that something I can not rely on as a way of keeping my alcohol usage in check.

Instead of driving myself crazy about all of this like I have been, I am going to simply add more things in my life that are non-conducive to drinking. I am starting up a Sunday "Breakfast Club" with my friends for us Atheist societal misfits. I will therefore have more to do on the weekend and have some positive non-alcoholic socializing that I won't want to be hungover for. I am also kind of close to having six pack abs, which is really cool...if I cut out the 1500 empty alcohol calories per week and the missed workout from the hangover and drop the alcohol calories down to 400 or so and no missed work outs, I would likely achieve that goal. So there's more motivation.

But the overall theme of this is that I am going to try and look at this like a challenge rather than a problem. I am going to try and build a bigger non-drinking life with more fun rather than having the same boring life that's dictated by self imposed alcohol usage rules. I am going to try and push alcohol usage out with better things to do rather than cut it out/down and feel deprived. I think that whether I decide to go abstinent or moderate in the long run, it will definitely help to have a busier life just to keep the boredom down...a big busy life that is non-conducive to getting drunk would be perfect.

So from here on out, I will plan my weekends so that I have better things to do than get drunk.

My question: What helps you guys keep alcohol usage in check (abstinent/moderate)?

Hey, welcome to SR. I'm abstinent from alcohol so I can't help you with moderation, but having a plan definitely helps. The tipping point for me was when I had more reasons to stay sober than I did to not drink, if that makes sense. My life is so much bigger without alcohol now and that keeps me in line way more than the fear of having a hangover or getting sick ever did.

You answered your own question with having goals and changing up routines.

I ultimately chose abstinence - and it's given me the best 5 years of my life :)

I do identify a lot with your story though - coming here and finding support definitely changed things for me :)

Welcome to SR HarmReducer :)

D

I can't have any alcohol, simple.

Hi HarmReducer & welcome. I was like you once, but I couldn't get past the "oh come on-you can't be serious" stage (when I told myself I needed to quit). Therefore, I kept drinking - and my life turned into chaos. Any attempts at moderating failed spectacularly. SO, due to the wreckage I caused by drinking - I keep myself sober by remembering the hell that it turned into. I want to live - that's my motivation.

I know you aren't as far gone as I was - and it's great you are looking at this now and coming up with a solution. I'd love to go back and reclaim the part of my life I lost. You're on the right track by building a bigger non-drinking life, as you put it. That's definitely necessary, or you'll just sit there bored and anxious. Joining SR was a wise step, too - the more you read & participate here the less you'll be looking for something to fill the empty hours. Glad you are here with us, HarmReducer. :)

I totally agree with using 'challenge' rather than problem. It's one of my strategies. Also about focusing on the richness of a life not dictated by alcohol rather than getting into the mindset of being deprived.

I think you are off to a good start. I don't know what to tell you about abstinence vs. moderation. For many people moderation truly isn't possible for them, but you will only know if you try.

Since you found you couldn't stay stopped or limit your drinking you're going to keep yourself very busy and eat less and keep to your workout schedule.

Sounds great, try that.

I think your plan to do a Breakfast Club with your friends on the weekend is a good idea.

And, how about looking into doing some volunteer work in your area? There is always some group that is looking for help. It's a great way to keep busy and get outside of yourself and a chance to meet some new people.