The more I read the more I see myself
The more I read the more I see myself
I have been spending a lot of time reading this site and the more posts I read, the more I see myself in them. There are a lot of people like me- Party, social, binge drinkers. My husband told me I don't have a problem bc I don't drink daily, but it seems that doesn't matter. It's what happens when I drink that matters. I have made so many plans with people and agreed to things while drunk...and then had to fake that I remembered them the next day so I wouldn't look like an idiot. I have been carried home, I have woken up on the bathroom floor naked...more than once. I don't think normal drinkers do that. Do they? I went into the backyard naked and kissed my neighbor...dear god- what if my kids or husband saw that??? This has to stop.
It's like my body know today is saturday. I want to go out and drink with friends tonight and realized I have already texted 2 friends to see what they are doing later. I am going to a movie later with my daughter and want to have a friend over after to drink with. I won't drink alone, so the smart thing would be to quit texting people. i have that heart racing excitement feeling right now anticipating a drink with friends.
Also, how come my husband acts the same sober as drunk? He is a "normal" drinker and I can never tell if he's had a drink or not- acts the same after 1 drink or 10.
Also, how come my husband acts the same sober as drunk? He is a "normal" drinker and I can never tell if he's had a drink or not- acts the same after 1 drink or 10.
I think you're spot on, aeo....... When I was drinking, I found a lot of "reasons"
to say I wasn't "that bad." I finally decided to quit anyway - no point in letting it get worse just to prove the point.
You know in your heart what alcohol does to you and that's what matters.
to say I wasn't "that bad." I finally decided to quit anyway - no point in letting it get worse just to prove the point.
You know in your heart what alcohol does to you and that's what matters.
aeo1313 I know what you mean totally, since finding this website I can't stop reading posts and seeing myself in some of them. Be strong, a few weekends away from friends temptations will help, you can do it;-)
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 34
aeo1313..I am finding the same thing as you, stories that mirror mine. I am only day 8 w/o a drink, my longest ever in 15 years. Our stories are a bit different. I have been taken to the hospital a few times over the years. When I worked, if anybody had questions about alcohol, everybody knew to send them to me for answers. Questions from which bar/bartender, type of wine for what food, etc.. Since I have retired, only one person keeps in touch with me out of about 350. He is the only one at work I could go out with and only have a couple drinks. That's who I text and for good reason, alcohol was not part of our friendship. Hope this helps.
It's also worth noting that alcoholism is progressive. I started out as a 'just weekends' drinker in 2004, graduated to 'just weekends and maybe once or twice during the week' in about 2007, and finally made it to 'plastered whenever I can find the money' by 2011. Alcoholism is not just the state of being physically dependent on alcohol, it is a predisposition to alcohol abuse, and something that alcoholics deal with whether they're actively drinking or not.
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