ZACHk

why do i have to go through this this is miserable. im 113 days clean. i hate it. i can barely make it thru my day. sometimes i think about overdosing on my love and not going back to it again. why would god do this to e i dont understand. sometime i wonder if i should jus go back. this love is kiling me quickly too. im sickinin to the bottom fast andi havent even used yet. i was to young to understand completly when i started because i was TEN!

doggonecarl

Zach, 113 days clean and sober is remarkable. Don't blow it now. As for help, you sound like you need it desperately. Call your sponsor!!!!

artsoul

Hi ZACK -

It's impossible for any of us to do this by ourselves. We don't know how to cope without self-medicating. It's especially hard when you're 17 and this is all you know. But just because you can't see the answers right now doesn't mean they aren't there.

Can you talk to someone, your parents, a school counselor, doctor? There's no shame in asking for help - a lot of us found that we needed professional help in addition to a recovery program. Just don't listen to the lie that happiness lies in a drink or drug - if you read the posts around here, you'll know that it's not true.

You deserve a huge congrats for 113 days.

P.S. There's a couple of 24-hour hotlines in your area for drug and alcohol abuse:
614-948-1191
614-726-3388
AA and NA should also have hotline numbers listed in your phone book.

jocata

113 days is awesome friend. Don't give that up! Get to an AA meeting, talk to someone. Call a therapist, your doctor, anything, but talk to someone and keep posting here. Don't bottle this stuff up. Please hang in there.

God bless.

LoftyIdeals

Zach...you have considerable time committed to this. It will get better, but you need to give it more time, and do what you can do to better understand the problem. Maybe you need to go to more meetings, like suggested by others, or talk with someone who understands. Posting here is always a great idea. Bottom line...do whatever it takes to keep from using, and fight through the pain. And, find another love.

Dee74

I'm sorry you're so low Zach.

I hope you'll reach out and get some help from somewhere - some good suggestions here.

Like Artsoul said, none of us do this alone - there's no shame in finding some support

113 days is awesome - keep going in the right direction
D

CaiHong

You definitely need some outside support. You found the strength to make it this far. You are hurting now I understand that, many of us have been where you are and have recovered what makes you any different? You have shown fortitude and deternination hand in there and go down the road to recovery.

You deserve to recover and lead a happy and productive life. What options are open to you?
Take the care you need, it is your right.

CaiHong

sugarbear1

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