Do I have a Problem? I'm sober quite a while...hubby drinking secretly
 

He has never been supportive of my sobriety...for over a year he drank 4 or 5times per week...I asked him over and over and over to slow down. Now he is doing "really well"...but I have smelt it on him and his reasoning is "I found a little drink of wine downstairs"...now I have found and empty wine bottle hidden under the deck. He says he hid it so I wouldn't think he was doing it every day...am I in trouble here?

D.

I removed your other threads...we had a brief site hiccup.
You might have a problem mama - hard for outsiders to judge...whats your gut telling you?

welcome back btw :)

D

My gut is telling me to get out...that this is no different than my first marriage and he is not going to change. I can't be around booze all the time...nevermind hiding booze.

I'm TERRIFIED.

D.

I'm sorry, D.
I hope others will join in soon with more experience of this than I have.

D

I'm sorry this is happening and I hope you can find your way through this.

So sorry to hear you are going thru this. I haven't had more than 6 months sober in about 7 years but the message I get from these threads, self help recovery books and in therapy is that you do whatever it takes to support your recovery. ((hugs))

Don't be scared; you got sober, which shows you have huge courage and moral strength. You can deal with whatever comes along. Do you have a support network?

I wish you the best. Talk it through with him as best you can and talk to a sponsor if you have one, a counselor, somebody. Don't be alone with stumbling over hidden bottles; it's dangerous.

the family and friends forum peeps might offer additional insight as well Mama:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/#friends-family

Definitely check out the forum Dee gave you the link to.

You too can become a "Double Winner". Many of us Alcoholics/Addicts also have co dependency problems, and having a "Toxic" person in our life, be they spouse, significant other, sibling, parent, child, niece or nephew, etc can be dangerous for us.

Thus there is also Alanon and yes Alanon accepts us with open arms.

I cannot tell you what to do ........................ I do think you see there is a problem, and now it's time to figure out what to do about it. If not Alanon, please find yourself a counselor who specializes in addiction.

Know that we are here for you, be it yuor recovery from alcoholism or your other issues (ie 'toxic' mate).

This site has so much for so many of us!

Love and hugs,

I used to hide bottles and drugs all over the place. That's because I knew what I was doing was wrong and that I had a serious problem, but it didn't stop me until I just got sick of the life I was living. Stay close to this community, we are here for you.

God bless.