Joined 1/1/2012 ... 2nd. day of battle of the bottle!!
 

It is noon hopefully by 6:00 I'm still winning for the day/night. Which is when I start drinking every evening 6:00 to 9:ish which I hit it hard!! (2 shots of rum in a glass of diet soda which is about 14 shots in that time spam) I wake in the morning scared, ashamed,feeling guilty... swearing I'm not gonna drink that night... I have had a drinking problem for at least 15 years. I hope this time I succeed! I'm tired of feeling like crap and beating myself up. I hope we all can fight this battle of the bottle cause it really sucks!! Hopefully I can get day 2! :-)

Welcome, and keep posting. It really helps get through the tough times!

Welcome nel, you can do it, but you don't have to alone... seeing a doctor is a really good idea.
Thank you for the reminder and I really mean thank you. Today has been rough for me, the 'battle of the voice' is doing it's best to get me drinking again. Your post has allowed me to sit back, take a deep breath and remember why I got sober in the first place and that's where I need to stay. It does get better, but you need to be in it for the long haul mentally. "To thine own self be true", You know you cannot keep doing this, the 'illusion' of just having a few drinks is just that and there is only so much a person can take. I knew I had to quit 100% or I would be dead in a short time, most likely by my own hands due to that horrid anxiety (which will get MUCH BETTER, I assure you.) My bad days (at three months) are nothing like what you are going through right now. Stick with it, fill the drinking time-slot with something you enjoy, keep coming here or go to face to face group meetings in your area.
Best wishes.

welcome nel - there's a ton of support here :)

Good to have you with us :)

D

Welcome nel!

How has day 2 been? I made a lot of morning promises, too..... I felt like I was living the same miserable day over and over.

We're here to support you. You're not alone.....:grouphug:

Day 2 gone working on day 3!!!
 

I made it threw day 2, just kepted myself busy around 6:00. It felt great not waking up feeling scared,guilty and ashamed!!!Plus I was 3.5 pounds lighter!!! I know I was retaining a lot of water due to drinking!I did have trouble sleeping and I sweat thru the night again, but I expect the insomnia. I read some post and they say day 3 his hard hope I can stay strong....no..I will stay strong!!I woke up craving a smoke cause when I drank that's when I would chain smoke!!I have weird smoking habits like my drinking a lot of people don't know I smoke, cause no one really seen me drink besides my husband that's when I would smoke. Plus I can only smoke by the fireplace in the basement family room which is where I drank in the evenings.

Good job on getting through day 2! Watch out, those hang-over free mornings can get addictive, lol!:bigok:

Welcome to SR! Are you going to get some face to face help like counseling or AA? Quitting drinking and actually staying quit are easier if you have support.