I believe I found something I have been searching for:
Fear can be powerful ally. That basic instinct can provide the stimulus to run to safety when we are threatened by a danger to us. Alcohol certainly falls under that category. This threat is real and is trying to kill me. When I drink, the fear leaves and is replaced with a pair of rose-colored glasses that blocks true vision to what is actually occurring to my well-being. By being afraid has given me that missing catalysis to return to sobriety.
Congrats on your decision and progress Creekryder. You sound like you have a great head on your shoulders.
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