Hello all
 

Just a short introduction, I typed out a VERY long first post and lost it, it said I wasn't logged it (but I was).
I really want to make 2012 my year to get sober. Day 1 was the first of the new year. I'm frustrated already just trying to post, lol, so it's not a great start. :( Happy sober New Year everybody...

Happy SOBER New Year to you! Congrats on making it here and Day 2!

Hi FallenAngel,

Welcome!

If you like, you can cut and paste a post in Word before you post. :)

Welcome, and to a great 2012!!

It's the first day of the rest of your life! :) Make it count.

Welcome Fallen. I too am on day 2. I am here if ya need support. We can do this!

Fallen hang in here!
It does get better, much better. The more and longer you drank the more and longer it takes to get all well again, but most feel wonderful compared to drinking within a week or two. Then it is just working your recovery plan. What have you worked out for a recovery plan with your counselor?

Gotta hate when that happens . Good luck OP in your recovery , its the right path to take .

Thank-you All for the wonderful welcome, it has made my day a little brighter. :) I have tried numerous times to get sober, the longest was 2 months of sobriety, not even sure then what threw me off track.

My biggest challenge I beleive is social interaction while sober. I am painfully and awkwardly shy. When I discovered about 5 years ago that alcohol helped so much with that, I wondered how I ever lived without it. :(

My most cringeworthy moments in my life were when I was sober. I can't talk or walk properly when around people and if somebody so much as looks at me, I turn red, and I can feel it, making it even worse. I've been on medication for it, but it never helped. Alcohol took it all away. Drunk or buzzed I am talkative, fun, relaxed, and likeable, ..sober I'm a freak.

Anyway, I'm getting sober so I can live a healthier life. Hangovers are the worst they've ever been and my depression is at an all-time high. I never feel well, and I've gained weight. I don't know how I'll deal with the social anxiety but I need a more permanent and healthy solution. Thanks again for the welcome. :)

My most cringeworthy moments in my life were when I was sober.

Maybe, maybe not.

It's hard to remember stuff clearly when we've been drinking.

Anyway, Welcome to SR!

Hi Fallen Angel :)

I'm shy too and I turned to alcohol to help - I'm surprised your most cringeworthy moments are when you're sober tho - my drunken embarrassment list was truly mortifying.

These days - I accept I'm shy.
It's me.
I am what I am.

I've accepted that - and recovery helped - by working on myself I've become comfortable with who I am.

I no longer cringe at my behaviour - I no longer feel like a freak.

My life's immeasurably better for leaving alcohol behind :)
Welcome to SR :)

D

Thanks Dee for making me feel not alone in my awful shyness.
I have had a few embarressing moments drunk of course but nothing really that I cringed over or dwelled on. There have been so many humiliating moments for me when I could not carry on a conversation or even just be around people. I actually will feel a panic attack coming on, sweat like crazy (it can be seen) and I'd mumble something and escape to a bathroom or wherever.
When I'm drinking I'm a different person, I've made so many friends drinking actually, friends that I can't even talk to when I'm sober. Being shy has ruled my life, and held me back in so many ways and alcohol became my answer. Unfortunately, it also became an addiction that will eventually kill me, if I let it.

FallenAngel - I also used alcohol to stop feeling shy & self-conscious. I always felt all eyes were on me, and everyone was looking at me in a critical way. I couldn't get up in front of a class in school, or participate in gym normally - all those things were agony for me. So when I found my 'cure' I was very happy until everything came crashing down around me.

What I needed to do was grow and mature so I could get over my shyness. I never learned to face up to things in a normal way, without my crutch. It was a fake feeling of confidence - I never changed at all. It's ironic because I feel much more outgoing and self-confident without alcohol. It took a little while to get used to feeling real emotions, but it's what I needed to do. I hope you'll enjoy the feeling of freedom as you break free of your addiction. We're so glad you found us, Angel. You are not alone.

FA,
As said and you said too, it is better to be a healthy and shy person than a sick drunk with a failing body and internal organs that is sick and tired every day.

I'll bet that after six months or so of sobriety you find that you have grown some in spite of yourself. And can handle it now. Once you have stared your own slow suicide by drink eyeball to eyeball, there really isn't a whole lot that will rattle your cage.

Think about that.

Hey Angel, I can completely relate to the shyness thing. Drinking made me a complete social butterfly. I felt so awkward in social situations if I wasn't drinking. I was always worried about what other people were thinking.
I have come out of that quite a bit, although I am still somewhat reserved. That's ok though. Sharing at AA meetings has helped me to overcome my shyness. It's not always easy, but if I step out of my comfort zone on a regular basis, it becomes much easier the next time.
Glad you are here.
God bless.