12 days sober today, better, but still having nightly anxiety.
 

Today is 12 days sober. Tonight is also night 5 of taking 1 clonazepam and 1/2 beta blocker per night. It seems to become less effective each night. Tomorrow I have laid out a plan of activities to keep myself busy during my anxiety such as disassembling some old LEGO toys and remaking them into new stuff (childs play but still distracting, and I still love LEGOs), playing Super Smash Brothers Melee on Gamecube, chatting on SR Recovery chat, and watching Netflix. Going to try to suffer through it tomorrow without the meds (unless I really need them) and then call my doctor on Monday to come up with a new plan. Perhaps an anti-anxiety med that is non habit-forming and doesn't develop physical dependency. I guess we'll see.

Thanks again everyone for all the support you've shown me for the last week. I have tried to repay the support as much as possible. And, just so I'm clear, I'm not looking for medical advice of any kind, just wanted to update my status in a fresh thread.

Oh, and HAPPY NEW YEAR! It is a great year to be sober! =)

Congrats on becoming sober and good luck for the new year, I've been sober 3 days and feel awefully weird but I feel better than i would have done if I was drinking.

Happy new year xxx

Congratulations, and good job on seeing a doctor.

I found the anxiety lessesns with time, but eveyrone is different.

Best to you.

http://www.cheesebuerger.de/images/s...tlich/g035.gif 12 days C&S is outstanding Xyphen!

That's right! Medical advice is between you as an educated patient and your doctor.

Have fun today! Wish my13yr old still liked Legos! :)

Thanks guys. Thanks, Ghostlight yeah someone told me that anxiety can last months. Not a very settling thought but at least I know it won't last forever. 1undone, your 13 year old probably still likes them but will never admit it because its not "cool" anymore. =P

Congrats Xyphen!
I'm on day 7 here and get anxiety also, especially at bedtime.
Something that helps me is to acknowledge the anxiety and even talk to it like its a person.
This is going to sound silly but I use a Mrs. Doubtfire voice (from the Robin Williams movie) when I speak to it. It's silly but it helps!
When I feel it coming on I say "why hellooooo there dear!"
I used to try to ignore the anxiety which only made it increase and worry more. Finding a silly way to deal with the anxiety to take some of the seriousness away helps me. Maybe give it a try?
Good luck and feel better!

Thanks for the tip, Jallen83! Congratulations on day 7! I will definitely try that when it starts to come on tonight. Could I ask one favor? Could you describe the anxiety you feel so I can compare it to my own? Mine is basically increased heart rate and palpitations, which when paid attention to seem to only make the anxiety worse. And just an overall feeling of fear that makes me wonder if it'll ever go away. Is this the same for you?

Oh and I love your avatar!

That's a wonderful start and 12 days is quite an accomplishment, for me anything over three days used to be a miracle. Now I'm just over 100 days I can tell you that the hell of withdrawal is mostly over, I can go to sleep much easier than in the first two months and insomnia was one of my main reasons for drinking so much in the first place. The other being anxiety, social phobia and agoraphobia, which is clearing up very well (one day at a time); I posted elsewhere that back in mid December I was able to sit down in a restaurant alone and eat, the restaurant was not very busy but it was busy enough to wear in the past I would've felt very uncomfortable and would've had to walk outside several times due to the anxiety. I wish you the best to stay strong, stick with it, stay sober and you will not have to go through this again.

Edit to add: I have one of those things I say as well, when I started driving again and I went through an intersection without panic setting in I would say "WINNING" as Charlie sheen would say. For some reason saying that just as he said it, made me smile and think of something else, kind of a weird irony thing. :)

Xyphen,
For me it begins as a tightness in my chest, then my heart begins to beat faster, then my breathing increases and my mind begins to race. The minute I would begin to feel any of these things I would begin to worry. I would think "How bad is this going to get? How long is this going to last? This is going to keep me up all night!" The worrying definately made the anxiety worse for me.
Thats why now the minute I begin to feel any of these things I just think "Well I guess my friend anxiety is going to visit me for a bit. Hi there. While I don't enjoy your company I know I can't make you leave so lets do this." And then I talk to it in silly voices.
For me the worrying was the part that made the anxiety even worse. So I decided I'm powerless against it, its not going to kill me, so no need to worry and make it worse.
Hope this helps.

Scolova, wow congratulations on passing that 100 day mark! That is a serious accomplishment. I will reach that eventually as well! Your anxiety must have been extremely hard to get past. The fact that you stayed sober through all of that is a true testament to your will power. I salute you. Thanks for sharing the experience.

Jallen83, thank you so much for that. That describes my nights exactly. Worrying about my heart rate and whether or not it'll go away just makes it worse. So the trick is to just accept it for what it is, joke about it, and just continue with whatever it is I'm doing. I'm sure this is a bit harder said than done but I am going to give it a try. Thanks again!

I am on day 37 Xyphen and the anxiety and insomnia are still there, but it is better than it was. Mine comes on as irritability and the feeling I want to jump out of my skin. I think I might try to talk silly to it too, try something different. When I sit and dwell on mine, it also gets worse.
Congrats on your sober time!
God bless.

13 days sober and finally... finally tonight my anxiety was manageable. I still took just half of a clonazepam and 1/4 of the beta blocker just to take the edge off but I'm positive I would have been okay without it. Normally my anxiety kicks in at 3, I was okay at 4:30am. I'm finally getting through the anxiety. And it feels great! Thank you everyone on SR for all the support. I won't be going anywhere, though. I'll still be here everyday.

Good to hear!