alcohol is my only friend
 

makes me feel warm and fuzzy

my life sucks

zero direction, zero structure, zero consistent social structure

getting to an AA meeting and watching television is what I do all day

I'm afraid. I couldn't finish my last semester of school because of anxiety, depression, and alcohol. Fkn pathetic. Had no consistent social circle. ONly time I had social contact was when I called a couple other people who liked to drink and when out with them. Other than that nothing. GPA sucks. Feel like sht. I haven't been able to achieve orgasm in 5 years due to some meds ive been on.(even since discontinuation) and alcohol is truly my best outlet for relief.

p.s.
I have urinated my pants passed out drunk countless times. Including in bed with women. This has done wonders for my self esteem.

No words. But {hugs}

I'm speechless. Will let the more experienced posters comment. I could just pray and wish u the best.....

Hey bud, you can wipe all that clean today- forget about the past and focus on today- nothing more. Dont drink and do something kind for someone. On Monday try and get an appointment with a good doctor/psychiatrist. It can get better, just avoid alcohol today! Good luck- life can get better.

ive had about 5 shrinks bro

current one is good, doesnt change my damn situation tho

none of the doctors ive talked to can help me fix my cawk problem either

Why don't you try something different? Go meet some sober people and ask for help. It sucks asking for help but at this point what do you have to lose?

I'm sorry for your situation, but I think you need to make some change, A change, any change. Changing one thing in your situation will cause a ripple effect in your life. I finished my university program using online courses because I couldn't manage the anxiety/depression at the times I was in the classroom.

There are tons of opportunities for you to move forward, but you need to take action. I have found many good books on dealing with anxiety. No, it probably won't go away, but you can learn to live the best life you can.

And, I've said it a thousand times on the boards because I believe so strongly - if you want a social life with sober people, volunteer. Get out in your community and do something to help others.

Alcohol is very like that controlling friend or partner who keeps you away from other people, tears down your self esteem. and makes you believe It's your only friend and that you really need It to survive.

There is a life without alcohol and it's far better than I ever imagined - but you have to take that first leap.

I know you have anxiety issues - but alcohol's not helping those. It wouldn't helping whatever meds you're on either.

I agree with Anna too - I used to hate my life - but all I did was drink and watch television too, so it no wonder I hated it.

There's so much more to do - the only limit is your imagination.
Volunteering really helped me too.

Make some changes Brah - you're not alone - you'll find a lot of support and encouragement here :)

D

i just wanna numb myself out with some god damn booze

Alcohol was my solution for a long time. I don't suggest it.

When you're sick & tired of being sick & tired, there are other solutions available.

Five years ago I was a full-blown crackhead, "working" on the streets, running from the cops, and couldn't imagine life any different.

Today, I'm back in school and doing well. Life isn't perfect but it's way better than the one I had. I thought crack was my friend, it was my crutch - I could blame all the bad stuff on it. I could avoid reality with it. Problem was, reality hit whether I liked it or not. My first dose of it was jail.

Early recovery was tough - I was broke (still am), had a gazillion consequences from my using days, and I couldn't seem to see the light of day. I kept working at it, though, and my attitude totally turned around. Not worrying about, or being ashamed of what I do when I get high is a gift in itself, and helps a lot with the anxiety.

You really aren't alone, there are a lot of us here to support you.

Hugs and prayers

Amy

Hi there, Brah. You might get this book and read it: When Things Fall Apart, by Pema Chodron.

Suffering is part of life. It isn't because you personally did something wrong. Without running away from it by numbing yourself out with booze, you can try to abide it and do what others here have suggested: do something for someone else. It takes the focus off your own feelings of suffering and helps you extend kindness to another. It might give you some space around what you're feeling long enough to find something in your life you can appreciate (a sunrise or sunset even). Then you build from there.

I hope this helps and sincerely wish you well.

Your situation stinks to high heaven! You sound like someone who has been beaten repeatedly; a slave so to speak. What got you to this type of attitude? You've had shrinks but is that really the answer?

I feel for you as you are suffering. No one should suffer like that and so we have to make a choice. Hope your choice is to escape your own prison and get real help and real honest.

Hugs.

Soberah,

Take alcohol out of the mix, I mean really try, get and follow a program. I know you find this hard to believe but it is the alcohol that is making you feel bad. I don't know what turned the corner for me but I am so glad it happened and I see clearly that life with alcohol is no life for me.
You can do it, there is a good and happy life out there for you. Let 2012 be the year that your life turned around.

CaiHong

alcohol just makes everything feel right in the world

I don't think it really does, or you wouldn't be here, SB

D

You aren't alone. I was deceived also. Alcohol was never my friend.

After reading your first post, I would say 90% of your problems are caused by alcohol...that's not a friend.

Oh? What is right, do tell?

makes me feel good