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Old 12-29-2011, 08:22 AM
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Hi I am new

Hi everyone, I am new to this website and not even sure if I am posting in the right place, maybe I should have posted on someone elses thread. I am working on Day 5 of alcohol free. I took my last drink in the early hours of Christmas morning and I have really had enough of the deep depression alcohol brings me. I know I am depressed and I feed my depression with its drug of choice = alcohol. I have 3 beautiful boys and I can remember so many of my own chilldhood Christmas moments ruined by my parents and family members alcoholism. I just dont want the same for these 3 boys, I never want them to have the shame, embarrasement, or bad memories that I still recall. I want them to have a stress free childhood, not like the one I had. I know I need support, I have tried to quit so many times before, but I really feel there is a change in me this time. As I approach 2012, I just want a better life for them and me.
Any advice would be soo appreciated. The evenings are very hard.
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Old 12-29-2011, 08:26 AM
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Welcome Mammy! This is a wonderful place. It helped change my life. It is a wonderful journey. Keep up the good work!
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Old 12-29-2011, 08:28 AM
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Hi well come. Great on the time already. That's all it really is. My very best to you.
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Old 12-29-2011, 08:28 AM
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Yeah...You're not alone and you are in the right place...Welcome. I guess somehow you just know when you've had enough.
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Old 12-29-2011, 08:40 AM
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Yes I do think you just know when the time is right. But every other time I always had an excuse - a birthday or the weekend or superbowl, etc. This time it was Christmas. Recenetly, I would spend a lot of evenings drinking and trying to control how much I drank, drinking water in between drinks, taking breaks. So whats the point in drinking then?
I am trying to stick to it this time, other then my 9 month pregnancy, the longest I have not had a drink was 3 weeks in the last 3 years so, I have a long way to go. And I am not worried about these days, I am worried about a month from now when my brain tricks me into thinking that I can handle it again, that I will have self control with alcohol but I know right now I can't. I wish I could freeze this moment in my brain and revisit it when I have the cravings again. But thats impossible....
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Old 12-29-2011, 09:28 AM
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Welcome to SR!
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Old 12-29-2011, 09:32 AM
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Old 12-29-2011, 09:56 AM
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(((Mammy))) - Welcome to SR! When I first began recovery, I worried about future stuff too. I found out, though, when I just focused on the day in front of me, it was a lot easier. SR has been a huge part of my recovery, and I'm glad you're here.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy
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Old 12-29-2011, 02:33 PM
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Welcome Mammyof3boys

SR really changed things for me - I was no longer alone and I had a place of support 24/7 - when those thoughts did come down the track, I knew exactly where to come

good to have you with us

D
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Old 12-29-2011, 03:02 PM
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Hi Mammy - I'm so glad you found us. I instantly felt calmer when I discovered SR - not being alone made all the difference to me.

It's especially hard on the holidays to make the decision you've made. Be proud of yourself for wanting a new life - you can do this!
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Old 12-29-2011, 03:17 PM
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Smile foxy

Originally Posted by Mammyof3boys View Post
Hi everyone, I am new to this website and not even sure if I am posting in the right place, maybe I should have posted on someone elses thread. I am working on Day 5 of alcohol free. I took my last drink in the early hours of Christmas morning and I have really had enough of the deep depression alcohol brings me. I know I am depressed and I feed my depression with its drug of choice = alcohol. I have 3 beautiful boys and I can remember so many of my own chilldhood Christmas moments ruined by my parents and family members alcoholism. I just dont want the same for these 3 boys, I never want them to have the shame, embarrasement, or bad memories that I still recall. I want them to have a stress free childhood, not like the one I had. I know I need support, I have tried to quit so many times before, but I really feel there is a change in me this time. As I approach 2012, I just want a better life for them and me.
Any advice would be soo appreciated. The evenings are very hard.
well done my freind and keep up the recovary, foxy
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Old 12-29-2011, 03:49 PM
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Hi I'm Diana,
This is my 23rd day sober in35 years of drinking. You have the best reason to stay sober. Those kids need you. I have 10 grand children and one great. They have all made it clear that they want me to be in there lives. I don't want to do that drunk. They deserve the best that I can be. I watched my daughter abuse her kids on drugs. She made them hate her. They are grown now and the 19 year old lives with me. She made me a poster on my 10th day that said how proud she was of me. I can't start again. OHH I want to. I wanted a drink so bad today I could taste it. My husband drinks so we have everything in the house. I guess I need to talk to you as much as you need to here this. If you start you can't stop. If we could stop we would'nt be here. Go to meetings if you can. Get the ladies phone numbers and don't be afraid to call them. Your future depends on it. GOOD LUCK MY NEW FRIEND, thank you for helping me stay sober tonight. You have reminded me why I'm going through this. No one made me quit. I'm doing this for me. Good luck dear.
Diana
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Old 12-29-2011, 03:51 PM
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Welcome Mammy! You're at the right place at the right time. My first suggestion is for you to write up a relapse prevention plan. Write down your triggers (ones you're aware of and ones you continue to come across as time passes) and write down coping skills you can use to deal with your triggers. Explore new hobbies and rediscover old ones. Plan your day so you have minimal boredom time. Take time for yourself to experience a few minutes of quiet and relaxing time. Breath. Seriously, remember to take a deep breath from time to time. I keep physical reminders (in the form of my rehab coin and my 24 hour coin) on me so when temptaion hits, I touch them, breath and remember the pain alcohol has caused in my life. Good luck and utilize this website to it's fullest extent. It's an amazing tool!
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Old 12-29-2011, 04:37 PM
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Hi Mammy! I'm also a mom of 3 boys. "Boy Moms" are special, but then again I am biased LOL So glad you're here!
Originally Posted by Mammyof3boys
And I am not worried about these days, I am worried about a month from now when my brain tricks me into thinking that I can handle it again,
yeah...there is tons of stuff to read about that on this site.
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Old 12-29-2011, 07:10 PM
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Welcome Mammy!

Congratulations on day 5! I'm so glad you're here and have decided to get sober. No one deserves the kind of life we put up with, depressed and anxious, just waiting until we can have the next drink. It's scary and strange at first, but then it just gets better and better.

I am worried about a month from now when my brain tricks me into thinking that I can handle it again
I found that coming here once a day served as a great reality check...... You may even want to start a blog here to help you remember what you've been going through.

If we can do it, you can too!
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Old 12-29-2011, 08:38 PM
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Thank you everyone for all the welcomes and kind words. I will have to work on ways to pass the tough times especially in the evenings! Thanks for all the advice I am happy to be going to bed sober on night number 5. I really find such strength in your messages and insight. Good night.
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Old 12-29-2011, 09:29 PM
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Welcome Mammy. This is a great place for support. Wishing you the best.
God bless.
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Old 12-30-2011, 07:23 AM
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Any coping skill suggestions? A quick glass of wine has been my number 1 way for 3 years. Not sure how else to handle things yet.
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Old 12-30-2011, 07:27 AM
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Originally Posted by perea3 View Post
Hi I'm Diana,
This is my 23rd day sober in35 years of drinking. You have the best reason to stay sober. Those kids need you. I have 10 grand children and one great. They have all made it clear that they want me to be in there lives. I don't want to do that drunk. They deserve the best that I can be. I watched my daughter abuse her kids on drugs. She made them hate her. They are grown now and the 19 year old lives with me. She made me a poster on my 10th day that said how proud she was of me. I can't start again. OHH I want to. I wanted a drink so bad today I could taste it. My husband drinks so we have everything in the house. I guess I need to talk to you as much as you need to here this. If you start you can't stop. If we could stop we would'nt be here. Go to meetings if you can. Get the ladies phone numbers and don't be afraid to call them. Your future depends on it. GOOD LUCK MY NEW FRIEND, thank you for helping me stay sober tonight. You have reminded me why I'm going through this. No one made me quit. I'm doing this for me. Good luck dear.
Diana
Thanks Diana, I find such hope you are on your 23rd day. I love that your grand daughter made you a poster, that is wonderdful! Good luck to you too!
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Old 12-30-2011, 07:29 AM
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[QUOTE=artsoul;3222244]

I found that coming here once a day served as a great reality check...... You may even want to start a blog here to help you remember what you've been going through.

Thanks thats a great idea to blog. I know that would be helpful to go back and see how I have felt. Thanks for a great suggestion.
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